Teenage Chat - Help Required

[ryeseagull]

When you were 16 Beachy, did you tell your dad truthfully and 100% accuratly what you were doing and with who? And would you have been pissed off with him if he did it?

That misses the point really. I lied to my parents and did stupid things at 16. I was never hurt or arrested, but they were still stupid things to do. If facebook had been around, I would have been devious enough to hide my posts. I would also have been annoyed and talked of invaded privacy if I was some how found out. I would have been wrong, though. 16 year olds don't know what is good for them.

I speak as a parent and, at 28, probably one of the younger crowd.

 

[Starry]

This 'anyone can view it' thing is bollocks. If Beach Hut went onto facebook with the sole intention of seeing what his son was doing then it is wrong.

no it isn't.

if junior beachy wants his butchin to be a secret let it be a lesson to him that the internet is not some secret hideout, it's public and if his dad, next door neighbour or perfect stranger wants to read it it's tough luck.

 

[Walkers Cajun Squirrel]

I would be interested to see what Jr Beachy Hut thinks.

 

[Stoo82]

Also, isn't there a 'statues update' thing aswell that pops up on your own home page.

No, Beach Hut you have done nothing wrong. Your only crime is being a careing perant.

 

[Acker79]

I Agree, Going about it that way is wrong whether your friends on there or not, why not just be upfront and ask him straight because you will lose his trust by going behind his back
In my mind being honest is the best policy.

For many people, facebook is another way to stay in touch, like phoning, emailing, texting, etc. Perhaps BH Jr made BH a friend, or gave him his FB address so that there's anoter avenue of communication. Maybe it wasn't a spoken agreement, but it is another communication connection.

For some people posting something on facebook is the same as telling them.

 

[Hiney]

I would be interested to see what Jr Beachy Hut thinks.

If he's got any sense he will realise that his Dad cares about what he's up to and is not 'spying' on him.

 

[NF9]

Also, isn't there a 'statues update' thing aswell that pops up on your own home page.

No, Beach Hut you have done nothing wrong. Your only crime is being a careing perant.

You & BH

 

[Westdene Seagull]

This 'anyone can view it' thing is bollocks. If Beach Hut went onto facebook with the sole intention of seeing what his son was doing then it is wrong.

No it's not - so now anyone, and I mean anyone, can read what you've posted on here - if your parents now decided to look at all your posts on this PUBLIC forum would it be spying ? Get real !

 

[Walkers Cajun Squirrel]

Also, isn't there a 'statues update' thing aswell that pops up on your own home page.

No, Beach Hut you have done nothing wrong. Your only crime is being a careing perant.

No, a caring parent would have spoken to his son and not gone on to facebook with the sole purpose of checking what his son is doing.

 

[Box of Frogs]

Read Beachy's original post again - he simply asks what butchin is cos he doesn't whether to be worried that his son was gonna meet his friend for some 'butchin'. He 'checked out' his son's FB page much the same as I check my friends FB pages to see what they are up to and maybe have a chat.

He is not spying if the info on BH Jr's FB page is public.

 

[Stoo82]

No, a caring parent would have spoken to his son and not gone on to facebook with the sole purpose of checking what his son is doing.

You are 16, so although your views are being heard. They mean nothing. When you have a child (and i have none) think about this thread.

 

[clapham_gull]

No, a caring parent would have spoken to his son and not gone on to facebook with the sole purpose of checking what his son is doing.

If the point of facebook isn't about letting others know what you are up to, I think you've missed the point.

 

[Walkers Cajun Squirrel]

You are 16, so although your views are being heard. They mean nothing. When you have a child (and i have none) think about this thread.

Ahhhh right the 'I have a child so I know better than you' bit. As a son, the same age as this one, I think I know more how BH's son will react if he found out his dad was checking his facebook page becuase he didn't trust him and it will not be well.


This isn't about the fact he did it, it is about the fact he doesn't trust his son. And I think his son will feel very let down. Show your son that trust is the most important thing in a relationship and don't snoop around behind his back.

 

[Collar Feeler]

I'd be mightily pissed off if my Dad was checking my computer and seeing what I was up to. Mind you i'm 40 and he's 72 and he'd have to break into my house as he doesn't have a key so I think i'd have good reason.

PS What's Facebook?

 

[Mackenzie]

I'd say Beach Hut is being a responsible parent myself, 16 year olds are generally idiots and still need looking after (I know I was!)...but perhaps, in hindsight, it would have been better making descrite enquiries into what 'butchin' is, rather than opening it up to NSC.

I've still got all this to come I fear, my eldest is only seven.

 

[Stoo82]

Ahhhh right the 'I have a child so I know better than you' bit. As a son, the same age as this one, I think I know more how BH's son will react if he found out his dad was checking his facebook page becuase he didn't trust him and it will not be well.


This isn't about the fact he did it, it is about the fact he doesn't trust his son. And I think his son will feel very let down. Show your son that trust is the most important thing in a relationship and don't snoop around behind his back.

Re-read my post.

(and i have none)

Yes but like i said, you and BH son are 16 - you views do not matter.

EDIT: That does sound a tad harsh. What i ment was, your view do not matter as you have very little experience on life.

 

[Old Greg]

Ahhhh right the 'I have a child so I know better than you' bit. As a son, the same age as this one, I think I know more how BH's son will react if he found out his dad was checking his facebook page becuase he didn't trust him and it will not be well.


This isn't about the fact he did it, it is about the fact he doesn't trust his son. And I think his son will feel very let down. Show your son that trust is the most important thing in a relationship and don't snoop around behind his back.

But it's got nothing to do with trust! You've got to understand that.

 

[sam86]

I'm not going to get deeply involved, because I'm not sure there's a right or wrong answer to what BH is doing or has done. But to those that are saying his son should have deleted it, or should not have had it on his profile if he didn't want his parents seeing it, do you not think kids have enough to think about? I know people with hundreds of "friends" on their accounts, and log on to Facebook over 10 times a day, should they really have to have in the back of their mind, every day, every time they log on, that they should check every message their 500 friends have sent them to see if there's something they wouldn't want their father to see? I doubt very much we're talking about illegal activity here. Just lads banter. Probably means looking for girls to chat up.

If he has added his dad as a "friend", then ok, it's his own fault, but he probably added him as another mean of communication, rather than thinking his dad is going to read through every wall post between friends.

Anyway, BH, you haven't achieved anything by asking your question here, as no-one knows for certain what it means. Maybe you should now confront your son, and ask him? I'd recommend not telling him about this thread.

 

[Stoo82]

I'd be mightily pissed off if my Dad was checking my computer and seeing what I was up to. Mind you i'm 40 and he's 72 and he'd have to break into my house as he doesn't have a key so I think i'd have good reason.

PS What's Facebook?

If your dad had a computer and was a memeber on NSC and was reading your post - would you be pissed off then?

Its the same thing. (kinda)

 

[Walkers Cajun Squirrel]

Re-read my post.

Yes but like i said, you and BH son are 16 - you views do not matter.

EDIT: That does sound a tad harsh. What i ment was, your view do not matter as you have very little experience on life.

Really? Even though we can legally have kids, get married and live on our own? If the government thinks we are old enough to do all that then don't you think our parents should think we are old enough to go out with them knowing where we are?