Appeal.................

[tezz79]

f***ing hell fellas just thought I'd say as much as we all rib eachother on here, when it comes to feeling that bad I'd like to think we are all friends (of sorts) & are here to av a natter if you needed it

 

[Gus is god]

The very fact you're still breathing oxygen is an achievement. Keep going mate, you should be proud of yourself.

I know deep deep down i dont actually want to die, my goal is to help Kids through things that i went through, i think it was a cry for help in the end pleading for someone to take the pain away, only once have i not called the ambulance and that was when i just had enough and felt i wanted to do it, and my neighbours thought something was a miss and called them.

Live is amazing most of the time for most people but for some its horrific, i feel im kind of in the middle, i have had some amazing things happen my son and my child on the way, but the i have been hurt in ways il never understand.

life sadly is cruel i am pleased im not dead, but i also hate how i feel.

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Gus is God. A remarkable story and pleased to hear you are coming out through the right end.

I was feeling very bad about things not so long ago.

I am/was (last day today) a tennis/bowling ticket seller. I was walking under a cloud. Wandered up to the tennis courts to check on Cherish (a charity for disabled adults). No sooner had I entered the tennis courts, a chubby hand was thrust in my direction - "Hello, I'm Ben. Do you want to play tennis with me?". The little guy was a Down Syndrome sufferer and whipped me (I was wearing flip flops). It was then that I decided I wanted to pursue a career in making people less fortunate happy.

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

I am/was (last day today) a tennis/bowling ticket seller. I was walking under a cloud. Wandered up to the tennis courts to check on Cherish (a charity for disabled adults). No sooner had I entered the tennis courts, a chubby hand was thrust in my direction - "Hello, I'm Ben. Do you want to play tennis with me?". The little guy was a Down Syndrome sufferer and whipped me (I was wearing flip flops). It was then that I decided I wanted to pursue a career in making people less fortunate happy.

Best career going, honestly. I work with a bloke with cerebral palsy. Wheelchair bound, can't talk, but is the funniest, happiest bloke I know. I can be in the worst mood in the world and turn up to work, and he'd make me laugh. I took him to the Withdean two seasons ago and a stray ball came into the disabled area, and I hoofed it back onto the pitch. I've never seen the man so happy in my life. If half the people I knew were as full of life and cheer as this bloke, there wouldn't be any problems in the world.

 

[tezz79]

Best career going, honestly. I work with a bloke with cerebral palsy. Wheelchair bound, can't talk, but is the funniest, happiest bloke I know. I can be in the worst mood in the world and turn up to work, and he'd make me laugh. I took him to the Withdean two seasons ago and a stray ball came into the disabled area, and I hoofed it back onto the pitch. I've never seen the man so happy in my life. If half the people I knew were as full of life and cheer as this bloke, there wouldn't be any problems in the world.

Where do you work mate ? My eldest son has cerebral palsy & is wheelchair bound, can't communicate & is registered blind.... He also has heart probs & has had 3 lots of open heart surgery.... He's only 11 & is a right little warrior, do u do any work at hillside school in portslade by any chance ?

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

Where do you work mate ? My eldest son has cerebral palsy & is wheelchair bound, can't communicate & is registered blind.... He also has heart probs & has had 3 lots of open heart surgery.... He's only 11 & is a right little warrior, do u do any work at hillside school in portslade by any chance ?

Nah, Broadwater for a company called CMG. It might tell you something about my personality that I get on with people with learning disabilities better than most 'normal' people

I'm so glad that society is starting to come around and accept them for the people they are, I can't begin to imagine what it must have been like for them 30 or so years ago.

 

[tezz79]

Nah, Broadwater for a company called CMG. It might tell you something about my personality that I get on with people with learning disabilities better than most 'normal' people

I'm so glad that society is starting to come around and accept them for the people they are, I can't begin to imagine what it must have been like for them 30 or so years ago.

Very true mate. There are some very good people around now though yourself included by the sound of it, massive respect to you all because from a parent of a child with severe disabilities I can tell you 1st hand that you people who care are a god send

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

Very true mate. There are some very good people around now though yourself included by the sound of it, massive respect to you all because from a parent of a child with severe disabilities I can tell you 1st hand that you people who care are a god send

It's very weird you should say that. I work with 4 people, and all their parents are so grateful of the time and respect we give their children. To me, it's the way they should be treated, like people. I can, hand on heart, say that I love going to work every morning and spending time with these guys. And I don't think many people can say that about their job.

 

[tezz79]

It's very weird you should say that. I work with 4 people, and all their parents are so grateful of the time and respect we give their children. To me, it's the way they should be treated, like people. I can, hand on heart, say that I love going to work every morning and spending time with these guys. And I don't think many people can say that about their job.

Well you sound like a diamond mate, maybe oneday you'll meet my boy ..... Actually wanna try and get him to a game as my seat is just behind the w/chair section in the north corner of the WSL so that's handy

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

Well you sound like a diamond mate, maybe oneday you'll meet my boy ..... Actually wanna try and get him to a game as my seat is just behind the w/chair section in the north corner of the WSL so that's handy

Tell me about it, after going to a few games at the Withdean, they're all aching to get tickets to the Amex, but I can't get any for love nor money! How big is the wheelchair area by the way?

 

[tezz79]

Tell me about it, after going to a few games at the Withdean, they're all aching to get tickets to the Amex, but I can't get any for love nor money! How big is the wheelchair area by the way?

It's pretty big in that section you shouldn't have much of a problem
Get nagging em, they should be looking after our disabled supporters

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

It's pretty big in that section you shouldn't have much of a problem

Excellent. If you see a twatish looking tall blonde fella (with a giant head) roaming around there then it's probably me, say hello and I'd love to meet you and your son!

 

[tezz79]

Excellent. If you see a twatish looking tall blonde fella (with a giant head) roaming around there then it's probably me, say hello and I'd love to meet you and your son!

Haha I'll look out for ya buddy I'll be the 6ft 1 skinhead right in the front row about 17 stone haha don't be put off I'm nice & polite really

 

[DerbyGull]

Going to bed late is bad for depression. Early to bed, early to rise.

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

Going to bed late is bad for depression. Early to bed, early to rise.

Sunshine, lollipops and...moonbeams and childrens smiles...da dadadaaaaaaaa

 

[DerbyGull]

I know deep deep down i dont actually want to die, my goal is to help Kids through things that i went through, i think it was a cry for help in the end pleading for someone to take the pain away, only once have i not called the ambulance and that was when i just had enough and felt i wanted to do it, and my neighbours thought something was a miss and called them.

Live is amazing most of the time for most people but for some its horrific, i feel im kind of in the middle, i have had some amazing things happen my son and my child on the way, but the i have been hurt in ways il never understand.

life sadly is cruel i am pleased im not dead, but i also hate how i feel.

A cry for help I can understand that. Sounds like your kids are a blessing in your life

 

[Gus is god]

I dont know if many on here are adopted or would admit it, as i have found that not many people are open about that a stigma they feel which is sad as being adopted is not a bad thing at all. But what i found was that after i was adopted i see a social worker for a little while and that was it, then it was kind of like ya on your own, by the time i had hit 13/14 i started asking questions i was told nothing by my parents for a while they felt i was not ready when i got to 16/17 i found my dads death certificate, it said pretty much that he hung himself, rocked me to the bones that did finding that out then i was told everything, kind of felt maybe my adopted parents should have got some help telling me looking back now, but what i do feel is that there is a huge gap is care there, in the space of being adopted and the being old enough to understand what has gone on.

I get alot of shit for not working at the moment, but its impossible il admit one day i could wake up and in a sense run the london marathon but on another day i could find myself at the cliffs wanting to jump.

Its sad in a way, and this is going to sound a little mental, but i do really really want to die, im in so much pain inside, people dont get it councillors dont get even family dont, but i cant die i have to much to give, its such a horrible conflict to be in, i want to be dead but i know i cant be as i have something i want to give back.

I going to stop typing getting upset time for bed.

 

[Gus is god]

Going to bed late is bad for depression. Early to bed, early to rise.

i take sleeping tablets believe it or not took them 3 hours ago and im still going, all tablets are a placebo i swear.

 

[Thinker]

i take sleeping tablets believe it or not took them 3 hours ago and im still going, all tablets are a placebo i swear.

Assume zopiclone...?

 

[Thinker]

I dont know if many on here are adopted or would admit it, as i have found that not many people are open about that a stigma they feel which is sad as being adopted is not a bad thing at all. But what i found was that after i was adopted i see a social worker for a little while and that was it, then it was kind of like ya on your own, by the time i had hit 13/14 i started asking questions i was told nothing by my parents for a while they felt i was not ready when i got to 16/17 i found my dads death certificate, it said pretty much that he hung himself, rocked me to the bones that did finding that out then i was told everything, kind of felt maybe my adopted parents should have got some help telling me looking back now, but what i do feel is that there is a huge gap is care there, in the space of being adopted and the being old enough to understand what has gone on.

I get alot of shit for not working at the moment, but its impossible il admit one day i could wake up and in a sense run the london marathon but on another day i could find myself at the cliffs wanting to jump.



Its sad in a way, and this is going to sound a little mental, but i do really really want to die, im in so much pain inside, people dont get it councillors dont get even family dont, but i cant die i have to much to give, its such a horrible conflict to be in, i want to be dead but i know i cant be as i have something i want to give back.

I going to stop typing getting upset time for bed.

Try looking at website of grassroots training.-really good local group can really help you with this stuff..the support is ASIST -a way of working with suicidal feeling...also maybe check their video on youtube 'i am alive.'
You are not on your own with this,i promise.
Feel free to pm if you want more info on them/a chat.
Take care as much as you can.