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Likes your rectum. I take it the other person above you thread has disappeared into the ether with a lot of other stuff? *snigger*

So i've lost 400 from my post count. Oh well, just means my secret that I was going to come out with at 1000 will have to wait. :cool: :rolleyes: ;) :moo:

Woody Allen's quote about coming back as Warren Beatty's fingers was class. Some species of mice after reaching maturity shag continuously then drop dead. That sounds good.

They forgot icebergs in the shipping lanes.

Posh Spice is a slapper Her husband wears Armani When he's playing for the national team She's shagging the Turkish army

You want the stunning French bird with huge tits who dances with you for half an hour then goes off with Mike. You'd settle for Caroline who laughs at your jokes for half an hour then goes off with Toby. You end up with a whiny Australian travel agent who sticks her tongue down your throat for...

I missed all this Lizard King stuff. I work in work hours. A summary please?

Urinal Ritchie? - you takin' the piss?

Keep 'em. They're hypnotic...

You want to bring in 100k of coke on the tide, submerged beneath marker buoys. You'd settle for posting an envelope of drugs to your mate in Milton Keynes. You end up in Dover with a Custom Officer's fist up your arse.

I thought it was going to be a thin as a wafer joke

Snake. Mastermind the other day had a guy whose specialist subject was The Simpsons. I got more than he did. But then I've got them ALL on video, up to season 11. After that it's shit. Done to death. And a travesty IMHO. It's painful to watch today's episodes - they're just not funny. And it...

Comic book guy, funnily enough. My fave is Professor Frink, for the voice alone.

sap

You wanted NSC to be a hive of intelligent threads, clever humour and lively discussion. You'd settle for crisp, witty remarks. You got fart jokes.

If it's only one piss, yes. If it's ten or more, you've got bladder or prostate problems.

When I was about 18 I could get away with 3-4 hours or less and had even been in to work with no sleep whatsoever. I felt totally shit though. Now I average about 5-6 hours during the week and still still feel pretty bright. I can do about 10 hours at the weekends, though.

You want a Ferrari. You'd settle for an Audi. You've got a Skoda. You want to be a singer in a band. You'd settle for singing in the bath. You end up on the bus, wailing along to your Walkman, hitting three notes out of five and changing key every two bars. and so on...

Re: They've knicked our national anthem! The anthems are different. The music's the same, but it's been around for donkey's years. They might even have had it first. Rooney was absolute class. Ugly mother though.

"You've heard of the Bermuda Triangle? Well this was worse. Up Joan Crawfords c*nt - there are fu**ing fleets of ships, light aircraft, hamburger stands (but no fu**ing hamburgers)....." :lolol: :lolol: :lolol: