Bell Cheeses at work

[Badger]

It’s taken ages for the Brits in the office to persuade the boss to buy a proper kettle to make tea – it’s just not the same from a microwave. Now all the Yanks have decided they can use it to brew their own exotic coffees – they already have a choice of eleven sodding types of coffee they can use in the regular coffee machine. So now when you fancy a cup of char or a Batchelors Cup-a-Soup you have to wait whilst someone is buggering about with a cafetiere of Panamanian Dark Roast. I can see another outbreak of tea wars shortly.

I assume this is made more annoying by the fact kettles take twice as long to boil with North America's stupid 120V system.

 

[Lyndhurst 14]

I assume this is made more annoying by the fact kettles take twice as long to boil with North America's stupid 120V system.

Yes - and for some inexplicable reason they have they have 6 different temperature buttons. Never a good idea giving Americans too many choices. What's wrong with a simple on / off button

 

[Lower West Stander]

Just come out of a meeting discussing trading positions.

When discussing one particular idea, trader replies with; "I don' think we should be taking that Segway"

eh?

 

[PeterOut]

Just come out of a meeting discussing trading positions.

When discussing one particular idea, trader replies with; "I don' think we should be taking that Segway"

eh?

Or segue -

Definition of segue

1 roceed to what follows without pause —used as a direction in music
2 erform the music that follows like that which has preceded —used as a direction in music

Not that it makes things any better....

 

[Cheshire Cat]

Yes - and for some inexplicable reason they have they have 6 different temperature buttons. Never a good idea giving Americans too many choices. What's wrong with a simple on / off button

View attachment 90931

Water boils at 100 degrees centigrade. End of choice.

 

[RandyWanger]

Water boils at 100 degrees centigrade. End of choice.

At sea level yes. The higher you are, the lower the boiling point. Coffee is best brewed about 80°C or it gets burnt.

 

[dazzer6666]

Water boils at 100 degrees centigrade. End of choice.

A Yank kettle will be in Fahrenheit.......and good point above about the coffee being burned, seemingly ignored by half the people in Costa who seem to ask for it ‘extra hot’.

 

[GreersElbow]

Multiple bell cheeses at my work place.

Everyone in the finance department is effectively a "Finance Analyst" which, 90% of the analytical skills of a dead dog. I manage the day to day liquidity requirements and run reports on our positions and risk management strategies, yet still these goons come to me asking for copies of invoices, if I can locate a payment on SAP (We don't use SAP in our department, thank god) and other bullshit because they have not a clue what they are doing.

The recent trend is regular meetings in the middle of the office floor with big whiteboards and graphs (which don't say much btw) where the senior analysts (a loose word) get to be all "look at me".

WHAT BELL CHEESES.

 

[Brian Fantana]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

 

[Normski1989]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

I tend to agree. I'm all for giving to charity and sponsoring people to take part in a challenge. But when did eating healthy or not drinking alcohol become such a big challenge? It feels like I'm being asked for donations/sponsorship on a weekly basis.

 

[GreersElbow]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

Agreed, someone's trying to raise £500 for a local charity by CYCLING a whole 2.5 miles to work and same back for a month too. He's also in accounts, he's also an avid cyclist, so...it's not really a challenge. Other than cycling with frozen nipples.

 

[Napper]

Multiple bell cheeses at my work place.

Everyone in the finance department is effectively a "Finance Analyst" which, 90% of the analytical skills of a dead dog. I manage the day to day liquidity requirements and run reports on our positions and risk management strategies, yet still these goons come to me asking for copies of invoices, if I can locate a payment on SAP (We don't use SAP in our department, thank god) and other bullshit because they have not a clue what they are doing.

The recent trend is regular meetings in the middle of the office floor with big whiteboards and graphs (which don't say much btw) where the senior analysts (a loose word) get to be all "look at me".

WHAT BELL CHEESES.

Whilst I feel your pain .....................

"Risk Management Strategy"

I mean really .

Dodgy ground on this thread

 

[Badger]

Whilst I feel your pain .....................

"Risk Management Strategy"

I mean really .

Dodgy ground on this thread

My thoughts exactly. He's not covered himself in glory there.

Also "I run day to day liquidity requirements"

 

[8049]

Also "I run day to day liquidity requirements"

I took that to mean he runs the office coffee stand.

 

[Easy 10]

I took that to mean he runs the office coffee stand.

I just assumed he was the teaboy.

 

[Notters]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

You're lucky it's just your office. I got one the other day from someone who worked at a company I occasionally have to contact, but who I had never spoken to, who I had once been copied into an email with. There was a sad story about a colleague or something but not sure it's appropriate to send such things to people you don't know? Not sure I can call them a bellcheese if they've been personally affected by it though.

 

[pearl]

I took that to mean he runs the office coffee stand.

I just assumed he was the teaboy.

 

[Iggle Piggle]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

Your mates are now chuggers. There's no escape. Here's a few I've been asked for recently :

Sponsored coffee morning
Having your hair cut
Climbing some stairs
Giving up drinking
A 5km run

My personal favourite was the dippy cow who has to be airlifted into jeans every day who wanted sponsorship for driving across Europe. Really?

Yeah, yeah it's for a good cause and all that but I'd rather give money to someone who hated heights and did a parachute jump. Not some bell end who fancies a new hair style.

 

[Brian Fantana]

Your mates are now chuggers. There's no escape. Here's a few I've been asked for recently :

Sponsored coffee morning
Having your hair cut
Climbing some stairs
Giving up drinking
A 5km run

My personal favourite was the dippy cow who has to be airlifted into jeans every day who wanted sponsorship for driving across Europe. Really?

Yeah, yeah it's for a good cause and all that but I'd rather give money to someone who hated heights and did a parachute jump. Not some bell end who fancies a new hair style.

‘has to be airlifted into jeans every day’ might well be my favourite phrase of all time.

Terrific work.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Beach Hut]

I know it's been a THING for many years, but I'm starting to get seriously annoyed with all of the inane fundraising that goes on in our office. I got into an argument with a colleague the other day because I was refusing to sponsor one of the ladies in the office who was going to be giving up biscuits, cakes and chocolate for a WHOLE MONTH.

I'm not chucking any money at Fat Mandy from Accounts for having the gargantuan strength to not wolf down an entire tube of Jaffa Cakes every 30 seconds. Mental.

Surely that is just a diet as she is fat so a lifestyle change ?

Ergo why sponsor someone who should not be fat anyway

I would add in one of our other offices an extremely fat woman had her desk moved nearer to the toilets as she got out of breath walking there from her other desk

FFS burn less calories, why not ?