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Bevendean Hillbilly

New member
Sep 4, 2006
12,805
Nestling in green nowhere
Personally I believe he has three birds "on the go" there are some pretty desperate skanks out there...certainly in the Essex area...He has said himself that he is not fussy so ,similarly, neither are some birds.


Keeps him off the streets as well.
 


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The Spanish

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2008
6,478
P
You play the game by not telling anyone anything about yourself and then sneering at others like a complete f***ing coward. :bigwave:

I can't work out what you do, but here are a list of possibilities:

Captain of a major cargo ship.

But that's unlikely. I think it'll be one of these:

- Working at a sub-contracted catering factory, pre-packaging £8 salads for the Sea France ferry canteen
- Hosing barnacles off private yachts while the boss of the small company you work for plays golf.
- Collecting for RNLI in shopping centres
- In a call centre taking calls for Norfolk broads barge family holidays.
- Parking wally on the Newhave Dieppe ferry

We all know it'll be something tedious to explain all your resentful sneering. What makes it so funny is that you describe yourself as "in the maritime industry" - a bit like a parking attendant calling himself "a valued member of the civil service".


every single one of those jobs seems far more appealing and interesting than sorting out 'bugs', going to lunch with jusdt the other IT wallies like social lepers, and living in Reigate.
 


Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,808
Surrey
hahaha or a helpdesk worker talking about front office IT support.
I'm sure the IT people supporting your noddy market trader apps are probably glorified helpdesk workers, but that's because you don't need anything too complicated. Bloomberg to punt your simple products, maybe Reuteurs and a couple of trivial booking systems. Lets face, anything more and I suspect you'd scream down the phone "at that wank IT department" because you've broken something, before laughing like a drain with your fellow barrow boy made good colleagues in between lying about who you've shagged and crawling up to the real clever people in your industry (the clients who buy your products) by pretending to be their best mate over BB and the phone.
 




The Spanish

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2008
6,478
P
I'm sure the IT people supporting your noddy market trader apps are probably glorified helpdesk workers, but that's because you don't need anything too complicated. Bloomberg to punt your simple products, maybe Reuteurs and a couple of trivial booking systems. Lets face, anything more and I suspect you'd scream down the phone "at that wank IT department" because you've broken something, before laughing like a drain with your fellow barrow boy made good colleagues in between lying about who you've shagged and crawling up to the real clever people in your industry (the clients who buy your products) by pretending to be their best mate over BB and the phone.

thats my favourite thing about IT lads. they get very sneery about how useless all other people are because they have not entered their own design on robot wars like them, or can do a rubiks cube in 20 seconds.
 


Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,808
Surrey
every single one of those jobs seems far more appealing and interesting than sorting out 'bugs', going to lunch with jusdt the other IT wallies like social lepers, and living in Reigate.
But that's not true is it. They don't at all. And you've obviously never been to Reigate.

I'm owning you on the back of the fact that you're too much of a COWARD to tell anyone what you do. That puts you on the same rung as a Morrisons trolley wally in most people's eyes.
 


Titanic

Super Moderator
Helpful Moderator
Jul 5, 2003
39,741
West Sussex
every single one of those jobs seems far more appealing and interesting than sorting out 'bugs', going to lunch with jusdt the other IT wallies like social lepers, and living in Reigate.

Sounds like you have hit the nail on the head, Simster... it's definitely one of those... so sadly he's not a Trident submarine Captain :nono:
 






User removed 4

New member
May 9, 2008
13,331
Haywards Heath
I'm sure the IT people supporting your noddy market trader apps are probably glorified helpdesk workers, but that's because you don't need anything too complicated. Bloomberg to punt your simple products, maybe Reuteurs and a couple of trivial booking systems. Lets face, anything more and I suspect you'd scream down the phone "at that wank IT department" because you've broken something, before laughing like a drain with your fellow barrow boy made good colleagues in between lying about who you've shagged and crawling up to the real clever people in your industry (the clients who buy your products) by pretending to be their best mate over BB and the phone.
hahaha guilty as charged, except I don't even need bloomberg or reuters, I'm a voice broker, do you need me to explain, or can you work it out from voice and broker ?
 


The Spanish

Well-known member
Aug 12, 2008
6,478
P
But that's not true is it. They don't at all. And you've obviously never been to Reigate.

I'm owning you on the back of the fact that you're too much of a COWARD to tell anyone what you do. That puts you on the same rung as a Morrisons trolley wally in most people's eyes.

in most peoples eyes trolley wallys are often people with learning difficulties who are successfully working, enjoying it, and enhancing their lives and contributing by doing so.

it's just in your snobby 'how much do you earn', i work as a City parasite and live in leafy surrey world, it is something shameful.
 




Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,808
Surrey
thats my favourite thing about IT lads. they get very sneery about how useless all other people are because they have not entered their own design on robot wars like them, or can do a rubiks cube in 20 seconds.
Don't you feel that your feeble cliches lose some of their sting when you're clearly such a sad sack that you're too scared to tell everyone what you do yourself?

"I work in the maritime industry". *snigger* Sorry, carry on.
 


Publius Ovidius

Well-known member
Jul 5, 2003
46,684
at home
I have spawned a monster

:(

can't we all just get along
 




Simster

"the man's an arse"
Jul 7, 2003
54,808
Surrey
in most peoples eyes trolley wallys are often people with learning difficulties who are successfully working, enjoying it, and enhancing their lives and contributing by doing so.
Yes, and when asked what they do for a living, I suspect these people probably say "I work pushing trolleys at Morrisons".

Not, "I work in the retail industry". Because that would make themselves sound a bit ashamed of what they do, while giving themselves license to snipe and sneer at what everyone else does - you know, the people who aren't to proud to admit to what they do.

Do you see what I'm getting at?
 




User removed 4

New member
May 9, 2008
13,331
Haywards Heath
Don't you feel that your feeble cliches lose some of their sting when you're clearly such a sad sack that you're too scared to tell everyone what you do yourself?

"I work in the maritime industry". *snigger* Sorry, carry on.
you've obviously never been to reigate hahahahahahha , I CANNOT believe you posted that
 




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