incoroparting no seats or teracing, just concrete steps with an 100ft wire fence around it, where you are also allowed huge flags and banners, and offal is handed out before the game with the programmes to throw at opposition players
a hypnotist who choses random fans via a ballot to come onto the pitch and perform all manner of acts at half time, ranging from nudity, an elton john impression or them being fooled into believing they can actually fly from an 100foot ladder above a burning pool of bleach placed in the centre circle
a set of kangaroos wearing replica kits who then compete in a race against each other consisting of 3 laps of the pitch, before a baked bean eating contest. fans would also be allowed to place high money bets on the outcome of the race, with the club recieving a large portion of tv money for giving exclusive rights to this event to a tv company in dubai
ballboys replaced with trained giraffes who the young fans are then encouraged to feed at half time with ucalyptus leafs sold via the food outlets in the stadium