This - this film is shit do not hire it or see it thread

[Man of Harveys]

We may soon have a new film to add to the list...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/4456656.stm

 

[Barnet Seagull]

Jonny English
Twister

Although I lasted about 20 mins of each before walking out of the cinema to the pub.

 

[Les Biehn]

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
We may soon have a new film to add to the list...

Bowie is a shit actor but with Christopher Nolan directing and Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman in it I reckon it could be a blinder.

 

[Eastleigh Seagull]

He plays the same character in every film: someone who gets angry half way through, shouts a bit, and then slaps or kicks the wall in frustration. See Rain Man, or A Few Good Men, or the Color of Money, among others, all of which would have been far better films with someone else in the lead role.
.

You left out his comedy run which he does in every single film where it looks like he is running really fast because he pumps his arms a lot.

 

[Eggmundo]

I think i can top that, although again it is sooo bad that its worth seeing...

Has anyone seen the Dolph Lundgren film "Blackjack". He's a bodyguard, ex-cop i think. A girl he's supposed to be protecting gets kidnapped by some baddie and Lundgren vows to save her and get her back. But there's a twist... Lundgren has a weakness... because of some trauma earlier in his life he's SCARED OF THE COLOUR WHITE!!!!!!!!!!!

Cue a shoot-out in a milk-factory, where the urns get burst and there's milk everywhere, and Lundgren is on the floor in agony because THERE'S WHITE EVERYWHERE...

The film climaxes with another shoot-out, i think its at the baddie's 'lair'. But the baddie has a plan... he's put WHITE BEDSHEETS UP ALL OVER THE PLACE. Lundgren's in trouble.. he can hardly see.. so he remembers all the things that are white and are, err, nice, and recites them to himself "Doves, little puppies, fluffy clouds.." I kid you not. This film exists.

Needless to say he ends up overcoming his fear and saves the girl.

This is a must see by all accounts!!!

 

[Easy 10]

Here's one for Easy 10. "Oscar", the Sylvester Stallone "comedy" film, done to showcase big Sly's funnyman skills. I seem to remember you once claiming you "gripped the armrests of your seat in sheer horror at what was unfolding before you" whilst watching that picture.

Christ on a bike yes, that film truley was utter turd, I actually felt quite embarrassed watching it. I do vaguely remember giving it a slagging on here, quite honoured you remembered my scathing comments actually.

 

[Easy 10]

I think i can top that, although again it is sooo bad that its worth seeing...

Has anyone seen the Dolph Lundgren film "Blackjack". He's a bodyguard, ex-cop i think. A girl he's supposed to be protecting gets kidnapped by some baddie and Lundgren vows to save her and get her back. But there's a twist... Lundgren has a weakness... because of some trauma earlier in his life he's SCARED OF THE COLOUR WHITE!!!!!!!!!!!

Cue a shoot-out in a milk-factory, where the urns get burst and there's milk everywhere, and Lundgren is on the floor in agony because THERE'S WHITE EVERYWHERE...

The film climaxes with another shoot-out, i think its at the baddie's 'lair'. But the baddie has a plan... he's put WHITE BEDSHEETS UP ALL OVER THE PLACE. Lundgren's in trouble.. he can hardly see.. so he remembers all the things that are white and are, err, nice, and recites them to himself "Doves, little puppies, fluffy clouds.." I kid you not. This film exists.

Needless to say he ends up overcoming his fear and saves the girl.

This I GOTTA see (even if you have spoiled the ending)


"Trained to protect...now he must SURVIVE !"

 

[Mick Beard BHA]

This I GOTTA see (even if you have spoiled the ending)


"Trained to protect...now he must SURVIVE !"

This film is on the 'Five US' channel NOW.

GO WATCH IT NOW!

 

[Easy 10]

Holy HELL
Whats the "FIVE US" channel ? What number on SKY ?

 

[Easy 10]

Found it.
Plussing it.
Looking forward to it.
Cheers for the HEADS UP mick

 

[defrocked priest]

I really hated Forest Gump.

 

[mattb]

We may soon have a new film to add to the list...

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/4456656.stm

AWOOOOOO you couldn't have been more wrong.

 

[Brightonfan1983]

May I start this thread my nominating:

Bad Santa

What a crock of shit, had some good reviews and 7.2 on imdb so hired it expecting a chucklefest but it was total bollocks, just lots and lots of the f word and lewd behaviour by BB Thornton as Santa with no real story/meaning and very few laughs. Avoid at all costs

3.0 out of 10

What is you avoid film/films ?

Am I wrong to want to see it as it has Billy Bob in it?

 

[Brightonfan1983]

Jaws 2, 3 etc etc. Saw Jaws last night and it is a MASTERCLASS in film-making.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Jaws 2, 3 etc etc. Saw Jaws last night and it is a MASTERCLASS in film-making.

Your not allowed to praise Spielberg, it is an NSC rule.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Originally posted by Man of Harveys
We may soon have a new film to add to the list...

Bowie is a shit actor but with Christopher Nolan directing and Christian Bale and Hugh Jackman in it I reckon it could be a blinder.

As indeed it was.

 

[Les Biehn]

As indeed it was.

Les knows best.

Oh and Bad Santa is well funny.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Chrtiopher Nolan is the best director in the business at the moment behind Spielberg of course.

 

[Les Biehn]

Chrtiopher Nolan is the best director in the business at the moment behind Spielberg of course.

First part is of course right. Second part is wrong.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

I have high hopes with Lincoln with Liam Neeson playing Lincoln. It has all the ingredients to be a classic Les. Due for release 2009/2010.