Ot children being attacked in the classroom

[macky]

To be honest, I think it's healthy that children get to experience the full range of human emotions at school. It'll probably make them more rounded people and help them develop resilience around things not going their way.

You know i think you might be right Yea f*** it i will take him to his first pub fight next week

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

How would you feel if someone screamed and yelled at you in your workplace ??

If it was a regular occurance I'd consider my options. A one off, like the case you present, no big deal. Going back to your situation I'm certain a lot of children have been yelled at in their time and by all manner of people...it's life.

 

[Mackenzie]

Am I the only one here who feels this whole episode appears to have been blown completely out of proportion and that everyone should just get on with things? No?

I'll leave then.

If macky's son is frightened about going back to school because of this incident, then it needs sorting out.

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

what has upset me is nopt the fact she told him off It's the fact that she was in a rage And she must have been out of control to go into a class to do it in the first place The school is supposed to be somewhere a child should feel safe and secure if someone burst into my house and started shouting out of control What would happen then ? would i be over reacting ?

For a start, she was in sufficient control to keep her expression of her thoughts to a verbal kind. She didn't have to be physically restrained from your son. To me, that suggests that although she was angry, she wasn't out of control. What were the words that she actually said?

 

[macky]

my son is a confident boy But havinga adult talk to you like that can takea lot out of a child He was going in the school gates on his own i doubt he wil be doin that again for awhile His cofidence has taken a dent Fair enough if he had done something in the street But surley it's the teachers job to tell him off If he needs telling of that is ? the woamn was not telling him of because he had been naughty She was telling him off because her son had been naughty

 

[macky]

For a start, she was in sufficient control to keep her expression of her thoughts to a verbal kind. She didn't have to be physically restrained from your son. To me, that suggests that although she was angry, she wasn't out of control. What were the words that she actually said?

Ok she was out of control enough to scare the teacher as well as my child Otherwise why would the teacher change her story And go on the missing list she was out of control enough to shout at her mate before shouting at my son She was out of contyrol enough to go into a class room and do it To be honest i dont know if she had to be restraind or not Like i said the teacher has gone missing
But it's good to know that if she had of gone that little bit further and smacked him something may have been able to be done

 

[BadFish]

Interesting. Why do you feel it's the schools responsibly and not that of the parent? If this woman had an issue with the son then surely the sensible approach is for the two parents to discuss it? Why lumber the school with what are parental duties?

The sensible approach would be for the parents to discuss it calmly however this is not always the way things turn out (as we see from this example). While i do agree with you I think that if the issue is school related then the school are responsible for the consequences dished out to the kids and if the parents don't like it then they should be taking it up with the school. The woman was upset that Macky's son was getting hers into trouble, that trouble was at school and the consequence was issued by the school. Therefore the school shoud be taking responsibility for it. I would imagine that a dispute like this it would also be necessay for the school to be involved as they would have a better idea of the 'trouble' that the kids got into than both of the parents who would have each of their children's view point of the problem.

As for lumbering schools with parental duties. I am very much afraid that this is the day and age we are living in. Many people seem to have the view of 'leave it all to the schools and then complain bitterly when things go wrong. Why are literary and numeracy scores bad? Well maybe schools spend too much time dealing with social issues and teaching kids manners and respect, teaching them to ride bikes, teaching them to swim the list goes on and on. Not sure what it is like in the UK but my feeling here is that schools are taking on more and more of the duties that parents should be responsible for. It is a great shame when schools have to provide breakfast clubs for kids who don't get fed at home.

Sorry got on my high horse a bit there.

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

my son is a confident boy But havinga adult talk to you like that can takea lot out of a child He was going in the school gates on his own i doubt he wil be doin that again for awhile His cofidence has taken a dent Fair enough if he had done something in the street But surley it's the teachers job to tell him off If he needs telling of that is ? the woamn was not telling him of because he had been naughty She was telling him off because her son had been naughty

Why not talk to this woman and explain how you feel? And then use your parental skills to rebuild your son's confidence.

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

my son is a confident boy But havinga adult talk to you like that can takea lot out of a child He was going in the school gates on his own i doubt he wil be doin that again for awhile His cofidence has taken a dent Fair enough if he had done something in the street But surley it's the teachers job to tell him off If he needs telling of that is ? the woamn was not telling him of because he had been naughty She was telling him off because her son had been naughty

Your son needs to take responsibility for his own actions and modify the quality of his behaviour. Is he actually looking at the part he had in all this?

As you say:

"I admit he's no angel he's a 8 year old boy The attack was not bully related just about two boys being naughty together."

 

[macky]

Your son needs to take responsibility for his own actions and modify the quality of his behaviour. Is he actually looking at the part he had in all this?

As you say:

"I admit he's no angel he's a 8 year old boy The attack was not bully related just about two boys being naughty together."

the naughty bit is about being quiet in class etc Not that naughty really is it AS for the other boys School record im not sure about
The school have never had any reall issues over my son But im not sayin he's a angel But he's a polite helpful boy Who will stand ground And whatever his part was does not warrent him feeling unsafe in his class room I dont think ?

 

[macky]

Why not talk to this woman and explain how you feel? And then use your parental skills to rebuild your son's confidence.

i appreciate what you are saying But i dont really want to talk to the woman About it It's not so much about her As it is about the school All i want isa applogy as the way i see no matter what she as the adult was in the wrong ?

Also he has done nothing wrong in his eyes she was having a go because her boy got told off ? as probably did my boy How is my son supposed to stop her boy getting into trouble ?

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

the naughty bit is about being quiet in class etc Not that naughty really is it AS for the other boys School record im not sure about
The school have never had any reall issues over my son But im not sayin he's a angel But he's a polite helpful boy Who will stand ground And whatever his part was does not warrent him feeling unsafe in his class room I dont think ?

This is the first incident of your son being told off by a parent in how days of schooling for him? 1 incident in 1200 days? Your son needs you not to dramatise the incident but to put it in perspective to enhance his feeling of security.

 

[BadFish]

To be honest, I think it's healthy that children get to experience the full range of human emotions at school. It'll probably make them more rounded people and help them develop resilience around things not going their way.

Lol. Are you serious with this?

It could make them a more rounded human being

or

It could make them fearful of going to school and anxious about interacting with adults. this could lead to behavior problems and a lack of interest in school which could then lead to self esteem problems all of which can lead to all sorts of problems in later life.

Maybe a little over dramatic but the evidence to suggest links between primary aged kids, experiences and what happens in later life is overwhelming.

Every kids has the right to feel safe at school and parents walking in to the classroom to yell at kids is not on in the slightest. I find it incredible that anyone can excuse this woman's behaviour.

 

[macky]

thank you all for your answers Some of which i may not agree with But being a parent is not easy
And i think everyone wants to do whats right by their child I do find it strange that people can condone such behaviour ?
i may be being a bit over the top with this But i feel that has it happened on a school site Just seems to make it so much worse
And yes i will be rebuilding my sons lost confidence But i really dont think i should have to

 

[jackanada]

what the heck I'll read between the lines too.

There are 2 kids friends with each other and both a bit naughty. They do some naughty stuff together sometimes, sometimes they get the other to do something wrong. One day one of the kids gets caught, and blames the other. This is understandable, he's a kid, he's been caught, he'll try it on. Plenty of adults do too. Mums go in to bat for their kids, this one has a bad day, buys her kids story hook line and sinker, storms in and bawls the other kid out. Not the best solution but an understandable reaction.
Second kid has been shouted at and also knows his friend sold him out, further during this encounter he sells his friend out. This is an uncomfortable situation with his friend (and some others too) - being a kid he'd rather avoid dealing with the situation - again understandable, many adults would feel the same.
Whatever the nuances the thing to do is concentrate on what you do have control of, in this case the OPs relationship with his son. So rather than all this energy going into meetings with the school, the mother, offering out members of NSC I feel he would be best served by TALKING TO HIS SON. About what happened, about how he feels about it, about what others may have thought and felt, about what he could do differently.

 

[jackanada]

i will be rebuilding my sons lost confidence But i really dont think i should have to

Please read that back to yourself and then rethink your entire f***ing being.

 

[Husty]

Have you considered private schooling? Neither him or you seem cut our for a state school.

 

[Goldstone Rapper]

what the heck I'll read between the lines too.

There are 2 kids friends with each other and both a bit naughty. They do some naughty stuff together sometimes, sometimes they get the other to do something wrong. One day one of the kids gets caught, and blames the other. This is understandable, he's a kid, he's been caught, he'll try it on. Plenty of adults do too. Mums go in to bat for their kids, this one has a bad day, buys her kids story hook line and sinker, storms in and bawls the other kid out. Not the best solution but an understandable reaction.
Second kid has been shouted at and also knows his friend sold him out, further during this encounter he sells his friend out. This is an uncomfortable situation with his friend (and some others too) - being a kid he'd rather avoid dealing with the situation - again understandable, many adults would feel the same.
Whatever the nuances the thing to do is concentrate on what you do have control of, in this case the OPs relationship with his son. So rather than all this energy going into meetings with the school, the mother, offering out members of NSC I feel he would be best served by TALKING TO HIS SON. About what happened, about how he feels about it, about what others may have thought and felt, about what he could do differently.

This.

 

[macky]

Please read that back to yourself and then rethink your entire f***ing being.

Im not sure what you mean ? i will rebuild his cofidence he will be going back into school on his own But because the school has allowed something to ge out of hand i have ot do this And i have spoke to my chiild about it And im continuing to do so
Troulble i cant really ask him his advice on what actions i should take And for reasons i cant /wont go into its me on my own
I have no one i can discus this with I just thought i would see what people thought my actions would be
back in the day i would have been kicking table and banging heads There are obvious reasong i wont /cant do that now But i was never really good at discussing things especialy when i thought i was under attack LIke i said just trying to see what others felt ?

 

[macky]

Have you considered private schooling? Neither him or you seem cut our for a state school.

why be like that No reason for it is there