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I thought that you were having a laugh - but no - my iPhone supports Crystal feckin' Palace ATM. I'm taking it for counselling.

So, who's feet were they then? Possibly line 3 gives us a clue ... the Holy Lamb of God?

I bet you didn't manage to get all that on the back of a picture postcard sent back home!

... and religious too? 'Those feet' mentioned in the first line were subsequently nailed to a cross somewhere in the Middle East.

I've told Mrs Fef that I'd be quite happy to be dumped on our compost heap, and let the local wildlife have a bit of a feast. The neighbours will probably not be too happy to watch a fox running off down the road with a chunk of my arm in its mouth.

Remind me, - how does that one go? :lolol:

In the media, it's a well know fact that centigrade (celsius) is used when cold weather is involved ("it's dropped to minus two"), and farenheit when the weather is hot ("temperatures have rocketed to the mid-nineties").

Love it ! Thanks for the chuckle !

and may well have watched winged porcine creatures in lunar orbit, whilst ice skating on the lakes in the devil's own domain.

Superb !

Aftershave and a black-ribbed knobbler.

Me neither! If I was listening to the BHA match on the radio and wanted to know the Prem scores, I could easily find out what they are by looking on my phone, my laptop or even my TV. There's no need to mention the Prem scores - the BBC aren't the only people who can look at the BBC website!

:annoyed:

This is what I have found - however individuals don't seem to be empowered to make THE decision that will solve the issue. "I need to check this with my manager first..."

I have learned not to trust a fart.

yup - count me in. I've put my name down for one of those retirement apartments; hopefully it will be ready by the time I need it.

As the Captain of the shed on your allotment, I think it's only right and proper that you go down in it.

Only from the neck upwards. Allegedly.

Correct! Don't drive down Russell Road, but drive into Grenville Street. Park on the lowest floor for a quick getaway. Don't queue for the payment machine afterwards - it's normally possible to put your card in the machine as you drive out. Have a great evening!

How small have they drawn Gordon Greer?