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[Misc] Who taps us on the shoulder and says "time you stopped driving old fruit"?



Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
53,230
Goldstone
So are we to rely on Mrs T to decide that my driving has become a bit 'erratic' or what?

Yes.

My step dad has dementia, but hasn't been banned from driving. I went out with him to evaluate his driving a few times, and it was decent. Having dementia he's forgotten a lot of things, but driving hadn't been one of them. He could still remember the way from his place in Mid-Sussex down to ours in Hove. It's just that he'd do it at 4 in the morning because he was confused.

We informed the GP and the DVLA a couple of years ago, and he's in the system, but it never got to the point where they said he had to stop. We have now stopped him from driving as he's forgetting too many things.

You can get tests from specialists, but you either have to pay privately or wait for ages for the GP/DVLA to sort it out.
 




sparkie

Well-known member
Jul 17, 2003
13,280
Hove
Once I'm living off a pension I'd like to stop driving to save on the cash drain. Can't see myself driving after age 70. I'll sell my last car for the price of a holiday.
 


Triggaaar

Well-known member
Oct 24, 2005
53,230
Goldstone
My Dad had to give up his license after his Alzheimer's diagnosis but we had made him stop driving a year before that when he started to get confused on the roads leading to a crash in a Tesco carpark that he couldn't remember the details of, fortunately no one was hurt but me and my mum convinced him by pointing out how bad he would feel if he was in an accident and seriously hurt someone because he'd got confused even then it was a struggle to get him to agree. He turned 61 this year.

Blimey, I'm sorry to hear how young he is. Dementia is horrible enough at any age, but getting it in his 50s is awful.
 


Normal Rob

Well-known member
Jul 8, 2003
5,797
Somerset
I would think I’m in the minority here but I think the fact you get lessons and pass your test once in your lifetime is crazy, we should all have to redo our test every decade.
Do you know how long the wait time is to get a test now? And the ludicrous system they use which means the rest allocated to you might be in Humberside (as my daughters was) - once yiu have a test assigned you then have to cancel it and hope someone does the same fir a test local to you that you can then get. It's madness.
So while in theory your point is valid, in reality it would be undeliverable given the current system as the lead time would be in the years given the increase in the number of test spots required.
 


DavidinSouthampton

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 3, 2012
17,361
My uncle in Southampton, who died last year at the ago of 90, was driving up until he was about 88. Latterly the car had evidence of lots of scrapes and minor skirmishes, so his son and I, who both had powers of attorney, took away the keys and sold the car.

Driving a 3.5 ton Motorhome you need additional categories on your licence, and that requires a medical….. which your doctor will charge for. I did it last year. Mrs DiS is doing it this year. Both have thrown up issues. For mine the doctor detected a heart murmur and referred me for an ECG. DVLA needed to check the results of that before the licence was issued. Mrs DiS has glaucoma problems which have been dealt with and the glaucoma clinic has signed her off - still waiting for the issue (or not!?) of the licence.

i can remember a few years ago there was a programme where they looked at older drivers and sent them out with driving instructors and did other things like that. Some obviously “failed” but several were fine, including one old guy of 100 whose driving was exemplary!
 




dazzer6666

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Mar 27, 2013
55,622
Burgess Hill
Yes.

My step dad has dementia, but hasn't been banned from driving. I went out with him to evaluate his driving a few times, and it was decent. Having dementia he's forgotten a lot of things, but driving hadn't been one of them. He could still remember the way from his place in Mid-Sussex down to ours in Hove. It's just that he'd do it at 4 in the morning because he was confused.

We informed the GP and the DVLA a couple of years ago, and he's in the system, but it never got to the point where they said he had to stop. We have now stopped him from driving as he's forgetting too many things.

You can get tests from specialists, but you either have to pay privately or wait for ages for the GP/DVLA to sort it out.
My neighbour’s GP advised DVLA the day he was diagnosed and informed him he needed to stop immediately

useful info

 


Scoffers

Well-known member
Jan 13, 2004
6,868
Burgess Hill
My Dad was 'encouraged' by his GP to stop but that was at the start of his Dementia diagnosis. He really wasn't happy about it at the time, but it was certainly the right decision.
 






Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
My uncle in Southampton, who died last year at the ago of 90, was driving up until he was about 88. Latterly the car had evidence of lots of scrapes and minor skirmishes, so his son and I, who both had powers of attorney, took away the keys and sold the car.

Driving a 3.5 ton Motorhome you need additional categories on your licence, and that requires a medical….. which your doctor will charge for. I did it last year. Mrs DiS is doing it this year. Both have thrown up issues. For mine the doctor detected a heart murmur and referred me for an ECG. DVLA needed to check the results of that before the licence was issued. Mrs DiS has glaucoma problems which have been dealt with and the glaucoma clinic has signed her off - still waiting for the issue (or not!?) of the licence.

i can remember a few years ago there was a programme where they looked at older drivers and sent them out with driving instructors and did other things like that. Some obviously “failed” but several were fine, including one old guy of 100 whose driving was exemplary!
I knew a retd Commander RN who drove up to 97 without problems.
Getting old doesn’t necessarily equate with getting useless, and any insurance company will tell you, it’s the under 25s who are dangerous.
 


Milano

Well-known member
Aug 15, 2012
3,954
Sussex but not by the sea
My Dad had to give up his license after his Alzheimer's diagnosis but we had made him stop driving a year before that when he started to get confused on the roads leading to a crash in a Tesco carpark that he couldn't remember the details of, fortunately no one was hurt but me and my mum convinced him by pointing out how bad he would feel if he was in an accident and seriously hurt someone because he'd got confused even then it was a struggle to get him to agree. He turned 61 this year.
f***ing hell that’s grim, my sympathies.
 


BrianB

Sleepy Mid Sussex
Nov 14, 2020
482
Once I'm living off a pension I'd like to stop driving to save on the cash drain. Can't see myself driving after age 70. I'll sell my last car for the price of a holiday.
Exactly what I've done , luckily there are local public transport options available, it took a while getting used to it but saves a fair amount of money.
As an ex minicab driver I've seen plenty of examples of elderly drivers ( including my parents ) who should have given up earlier than they did .
 






GT49er

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Feb 1, 2009
49,205
Gloucester
I knew a retd Commander RN who drove up to 97 without problems.
Getting old doesn’t necessarily equate with getting useless, and any insurance company will tell you, it’s the under 25s who are dangerous.
That doesn't stop the insurance companies whacking on hugely increased premiums for older drivers, even if they've virtually got 50 years of no claims bonus that should be taken into account!
The 'tap on the shoulder' the OP mentions will probably come from the insurance company demanding your entire old age pension (and some)!
 


DavidinSouthampton

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jan 3, 2012
17,361
Exactly what I've done , luckily there are local public transport options available, it took a while getting used to it but saves a fair amount of money.
As an ex minicab driver I've seen plenty of examples of elderly drivers ( including my parents ) who should have given up earlier than they did .
On a slightly lesser note, we went down from 2 cars to one once we had both retired. we live five minutes walk away from the main bus route between Winchester and Southampton, and there is a station five minutes walk away - only head a branch line, but……. We also have electric Bikes.
 




Harry Wilson's tackle

Harry Wilson's Tackle
NSC Patron
Oct 8, 2003
56,277
Faversham
Yes.

My step dad has dementia, but hasn't been banned from driving. I went out with him to evaluate his driving a few times, and it was decent. Having dementia he's forgotten a lot of things, but driving hadn't been one of them. He could still remember the way from his place in Mid-Sussex down to ours in Hove. It's just that he'd do it at 4 in the morning because he was confused.

We informed the GP and the DVLA a couple of years ago, and he's in the system, but it never got to the point where they said he had to stop. We have now stopped him from driving as he's forgetting too many things.

You can get tests from specialists, but you either have to pay privately or wait for ages for the GP/DVLA to sort it out.
So what happens when you don't have a caring and attentive family at hand?
 


thedonkeycentrehalf

Moved back to wear the gloves (again)
Jul 7, 2003
9,364
My dad didn't learn to drive until he was in his late 30s and always had mopeds. He gave up the moped when he got to 75 years old. He was 82 this year and although he is still on the insurance (my mum is 76) he rarely drives and only keeps it just in case because where they live at the moment has very limited public transport. They want to move back to Sussex and when they do, he will stop driving and rely on public transport and his mobility scooter.

However, don't be fooled into thinking those with mobility scooters can't cause traffic issues. On Tuesday, I went to go into Burgess Hill town centre at lunchtime and got held up in a traffic queue behind a man driving his scooter along the roads - not to one side but in the middle of the lane so nobody could get past easily.

When I drove out of Burgess Hill later that afternoon, the same bloke was driving in the middle of the inside lane along the A2300 dual carriageway towards Hickstead😲
 


Shropshire Seagull

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2004
8,793
Telford
I knew a retd Commander RN who drove up to 97 without problems.
Getting old doesn’t necessarily equate with getting useless, and any insurance company will tell you, it’s the under 25s who are dangerous.
My dad is 97 in August (ex RAF) and still drives. But only from Saltdean to Asda (Marina & back) to do his weekly shop every Saturday morning. For the rest of his travel he used busses.

Earlier this month his car was due its MOT and for a couple of years now he's been saying if it needs anything major, he'll call it a day.

It passed, with only 600 miles done since last year.

His eyesight is fine, as are all his other faculties, but his reaction time is slow, so he never exceeds the speed limit.

I don't think his driving is a danger to anyone yet, but the situation is being monitored. I've already asked for first refusal on his very low mileage 15 year old car.
 


Gazwag

5 millionth post poster
Mar 4, 2004
30,754
Bexhill-on-Sea
My Dad was 'encouraged' by his GP to stop but that was at the start of his Dementia diagnosis. He really wasn't happy about it at the time, but it was certainly the right decision.
Having to stop driving really upset my Dad, its easy for people (including me in the past) to say, "that's so irresponsible, they shouldn't be on the road" but I can see now its not easy to give up something that gives you such freedom of travel, especially if you can no longer walk very far and public transport isn't easily available.
 




Thunder Bolt

Silly old bat
Once I'm living off a pension I'd like to stop driving to save on the cash drain. Can't see myself driving after age 70. I'll sell my last car for the price of a holiday.
I’m almost 76, and in the process of my second three year renewal, it’s difficult doing shopping without a car, with medical reasons why I can’t do heavy lifting. Fortunately my other half does that. I know my limitations now, and only drive locally, as I have problems with night driving due to cataracts regrowing. I will be having laser treatment soon.
 


chickens

Have you considered masterly inactivity?
NSC Patron
Oct 12, 2022
2,703
I’ve got it into my head that I’ll stop at 75 even if I feel like I’m still ok to drive.

I’ve never seen anyone improve from that point forward, and I live a five minute walk from a station, and a three minute walk to a bus stop. I don’t want to wait for somebody to have to tell me that I’ve become a danger to myself and others.

It will mean some lifestyle changes (relying on groceries and heavier items being delivered, a bit more planning required for days out) but should be doable.

Just over a decade ago at a motorway services I watched an elderly gentleman as he first drove his pristine Rover 75 into the back of an Audi SUV with quite some force, and then to correct, reversed it hard into the BMW convertible parked behind. Everyone was stood around looking on in horror while his wife (who’d got out of the car prior to the parking attempt) covered her face with her hands. “Don’t worry,” the gentleman said, and then immediately did it again (both cars) his wife climbed back into the car, and he drove off red-faced and complaining.

It was surreal, but has stayed with me as an example of what I absolutely don’t want to become.
 


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