Things you never hear said by anyone, ever

[Badger]

I think this football coverage will be improved with the addition of Andy Townsend.

 

[Shirty]

I wish all websites were as reliable as Seagulls Player

 

[Alba Badger]

“You know that Robbie Savage, I could listen to his words of wisdom all day long. “

“Who, Ann Widdecombe? Yeah I shagged her”

“Eastenders is so realistic? It’s just as ethnically diverse as the real east end”

 

[Badger]

That Tim Lovejoy, he always seems like a capable TV presenter.

 

[Pavilionaire]

"Lads, while we're all waiting to be served the first round I just want to say that the wife sends her regards and says hi!"

 

[Badger]

One for anyone who's been to US/Canada:

"I really love how they don't include taxes in their prices."

 

[ManOfSussex]

My girlfriend loves it when I get really drunk.

 

[BBassic]

That ref had a cracking game.

 

[GT49er]

That GT49er, what a guy, he's not a prat at all is he.

Still a bitter remoaner then?

 

[Pavilionaire]

"Andy Gray and Richard Keys have been away from our screens for far too long."

 

[Simster]

"I wonder what Donald Trump's wife saw in him?"

 

[ManOfSussex]

There's never a problem in the pubs in Cardiff with away colours.

 

[Badger]

Mmm, I just love kale.

 

[Eric Youngs Contact Lense]

Bloke :the wife's away for the weekend, but I would rather just have a quiet night in thanks..
Bloke : Do you have to go out sweetheart, couldn't we just have a quiet night in?
Wife : It's alright, Poldark's on iplayer, I can watch it anytime!

 

[Eric Youngs Contact Lense]

It's not the teachers fault.. I can't control him at home either..

 

[Gwylan]

Mmm, I just love kale.

That's a bizarre one.

I love kale, eat it about twice a week. There are loads of people who eat it, it's a really popular food

 

[ManOfSussex]

I don't really fancy a doner kebab, I've had too much to drink.

 

[Gullflyinghigh]

Stan Collymore is truly king of the pundits. His blend of insight, experience and obvious radio nous really make him stand out.

 

[pasty]

Bloke :the wife's away for the weekend, but I would rather just have a quiet night in thanks..
Bloke : Do you have to go out sweetheart, couldn't we just have a quiet night in?

Both those sentences have passed my lips before now.

 

[Codner's Wallop]

it was a sad day for football when Steve Claridge hung up his mic....