The North Stand Chat Arms

[Basil Fawlty]

Does anyone reckon London Irish might pop in for a pint later or do you think this establishment is beneath him

If he does, then people willl be making a quick dash out of the door I'm affraid.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Dave, you sorted that ref out yet

 

[Dave the OAP]

Dave, you sorted that ref out yet

you said you were going to do it

 

[Parson Henry]

Puts

'Let's twist again' on the jukebox...

and lets rip in the middle of the saloon bar!!

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

LI is lurking around as he has posted on McGhee is a twat, LI could get some decent arguments going in the oub I reckon.

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Looks like I'll have to

 

[surrey jim]

"has anyone ordered a taxi from shoreham taxi's, cos its at the door?"

" What do you mean you odered one three weeks ago and its only just turned up...."

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

OY my glass is empty, whose fecking round is it

 

[surrey jim]

Puts

'Let's twist again' on the jukebox...

and lets rip in the middle of the saloon bar!!

another Guiness please Gina

 

[Parson Henry]

another Guiness please Gina

...................................................................like we did last year.........................do you remember when.................

 

[Dave the OAP]

" ...when they Begin the Begine..............la la la la ....la la la la la......"



Hears from afar



" Get off that f***ing karioki machine and give someone else a f***ing go......"

then realise Mrs DTG has just walked in

 

[Basil Fawlty]

New Competition goes up on the board:

After the dissapointment of the beer drinking competition.

A KARAKOKE COMPETITION INSTEAD:

SIGN UP BELOW:

 

[surrey jim]

then realise Mrs DTG has just walked in

see you later Dave

 

[Dave the OAP]

".....GOODBYE NORMA JEAN......"


SINGS REALLY LOUDLY TO DROWN OUT THE jUKEBOX

 

[Parson Henry]

" ...when they Begin the Begine..............la la la la ....la la la la la......"



Hears from afar



" Get off that f***ing karioki machine and give someone else a f***ing go......"

then realise Mrs DTG has just walked in

I thought your missus would be Mrs DI?

 

[Dave the OAP]

New Competition goes up on the board:

After the dissapointment of the beer drinking competition.

A KARAKOKE COMPETITION INSTEAD:

SIGN UP BELOW:

f*** off shortarse...you are not getting me off here

 

[Parson Henry]

".....GOODBYE NORMA JEAN......"


SINGS REALLY LOUDLY TO DROWN OUT THE jUKEBOX

Pours beer over DI to shut him up so that all the others can keep twisting...

 

[Dave the OAP]

I thought your missus would be Mrs DI?

shhhhhhhhhhhhhh

 

[Uncle Spielberg]

Mrs DTG

" David you told me you were coming directly home from work, get into the car immediately , just wait till I get you home ".

DTG leaves the pub with his tail between his legs.

 

[Dave the OAP]

"...ACE OF SPADES....ACE OF SPADES....."


still singing on the machine whilst being dragged out of the door by an irate Mrs DTG


Oh Bugger, i have snapped the microphone lead!!!!