Rubbish Jokes

[TSB]

Q: What's green and sings?

A: Elvis Parsley

Q: What's orange and sounds like a parrot?

A: A carrot

Did you hear about the funeral Larry LaPrise, the inventor of the Hokey Cokey? Total disaster! Why? Well, they put the left leg in...that's where the trouble started...

 

[Twinkle Toes]

Johnny Dixon.

 

[Garage_Doors]

Whats Blue & white, and if it fall out of a tree can kill you ??










Fridge with a denim jacket on

 

[Mendoza]

Whats Brown and Sticky?

A Brown Stick



Whats green and runs around your garden?

A hedge


Where do Sisters go after dinner?

Nuneaton

 

[otk]

How many fish can you get in a pair of tights?

2 soles

2 (h)eels

and

a wet pla(i)ce

 

[Seagullible]

what do you call two bananas?

a pair of slippers

 

[The Grockle]

Two parrots on a perch, one turns round to the other and says 'can you smell fish?'

 

[Titanic]

Why do ghosts get on so well with devils?
.
.
.
.
Because demons are a ghouls best friend!

 

[Garage_Doors]

what do you call a deer with no eyes ?

no idea...( no eye deer )


what do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs ?

Still no idea

 

[Garage_Doors]

whats pink and wrinkled and hangs out your underpants ?


Your mum

 

[otk]

How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb?

A goldfish

 

[Garage_Doors]

What green and smells of pork


Kermit's fingers

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

A man goes to a zoo, when he gets there, there is only one animal to see and it's a dog!


It was a Shitzu!

 

[Garage_Doors]

What do you call a boomerang that don't come back ?



A stick

 

[Garage_Doors]

Bloke was in to a bar and says ouch,

It was iron bar

 

[The Timekeeper]

Why was the sand wet?

Coz the Sea Weed.

A battery and a firework have been arrested.....

One got charged, the other one got let off!!!

 

[Garage_Doors]

Was on a bus the other day wen a tall blond walked passed,
knew she was tall as i was on the top deck

 

[otk]

What's better than roses on your piano?

Tulips on your organ

 

[Titanic]

A report in the Argus says that all the toilets have been stolen from Brighton Police station.

A spokesman said 'We are investigating, but at present have nothing to go on'.

 

[Mendoza]

Why did the H commit suicide

Because G had