O/T When your child is being bullied......

[Mrs Coach]

Nothing to do with Albion I know, but I wondered with the vast range of experience on here if someone has had a light at the end of the tunnel when trying to deal with their child being bullied at school?

After yet another distressed call from Princess Coach, I'm seriously fuming and trying to hold myself back from going and knocking a few heads together and getting myself thrown in the klink! For all the bluff and bluster of schools having 'anti-bullying policies' - do these things EVER get sorted?

 

[gullshark]

My dad used to say "hit the bastard back harder than he hit you"

probably not the best advice, but there ya go!

 

[Mrs Coach]

Girls tend to slap!

 

[hans kraay fan club]

From what I can tell [only having boys] girls seem so much NASTIER than boys in this respect. Kids generally are far less bothered about the odd slap, than the emotional stuff.

Girls as young as 7-8 seem to have a special talent for being hurtful to their enemy [who was their best friend the previous week].

 

[Starry]

How old is Princess Coach?

 

[Starry]

From what I can tell [only having boys] girls seem so much NASTIER than boys in this respect. Kids generally are far less bothered about the odd slap, than the emotional stuff.

Girls as young as 7-8 seem to have a special talent for being hurtful to their enemy [who was their best freind the previous week].

Girls are horrid.

 

[ROSM]

My friend's oldest had this happen to him - he is a very studious (some would say 'geeky') child and was an obvious target. The school didn't initially take it seriously until a teacher saw it happening. But G also had to develop a strong personality to get over it and used humour to try and get through. he has come out the other side stronger but I wonder what would have happened if the teacher hadn't seen it for themselves.

His parents tried everything with the school to very little avail. However during a later incident some years on in the year that their youngest boy is now in, the parents of another child threatened using the police about online bullying before the school took any notice.

 

[macky]

Girls tend to slap!

teach her to punch and punch hard

 

[Nibble]

While the school has a responsibility to protect children there really is only one way to stop being bullied and that is to stand up for herself, Until she does this the bullying will continue in one form or another. You have to teach her to not be afraid.

 

[Caveman]

My dad used to say "hit the bastard back harder than he hit you"

probably not the best advice, but there ya go!

Exactly what I was thinking before I opened the thread.

It is a tough one! You can bring your child up to be mild and placid and then they come up against some rough (can I say it council flat) ASBO they will get walked all over.

What about self defence classes?

 

[Mrs Coach]

How old is Princess Coach?

12, first year at 'Big School'!

 

[steward 433]

teach her to punch and punch hard

Is the correct answer

That's how i got through it. I joined a boxing club and after smacking a few of them back word got round i could look after myself it all stopped.

 

[Mrs Coach]

From what I can tell [only having boys] girls seem so much NASTIER than boys in this respect. Kids generally are far less bothered about the odd slap, than the emotional stuff.

Girls as young as 7-8 seem to have a special talent for being hurtful to their enemy [who was their best friend the previous week].

You're spot on. It's mainly verbal abuse, and the three girls involved 'ganging' up on her, but it's also been a couple of slaps and Monday, she came home with a bruise on her wrist that the other girl claimed was done 'accidentally'. It's hard sitting at home, not knowing what's going on, but you cant sit in with them every lesson, every day (although today I feel like doing just that!). I've left messages at the school that I want to speak to someone AGAIN!

 

[Yorkie]

12, first year at 'Big School'!

My daughter was (and still is) very intelligent and got bullied as a consequence. I reported it to the school who were quite helpful.
Three girls were made to apologise to her in writing and it seemed to stop. There was also an incident at Guides where I went directly to the girl's parents as it was physical abuse therefore classed as assault. The girl's father was a police sergeant and I told him if he didn't deal with his daughter then I would report it to the police. He wasn't very pleased as you could imagine (and I'm not altogether sure that I would have carried out the threat) but it worked.
Going to the parents and telling the school worked.

 

[Jamon Jamon]

Going to the parents and telling the school worked.

she obviously never went to Falmer then?


.

 

[Yorkie]

she obviously never went to Falmer then?


.

No this was in Cleckheaton in West Yorkshire.

 

[Hiney]

There's so much PC crap flying around these days you HAVE to at least try and sort it out through 'proper' channels.

Get her to keep a diary and get it on record with the school

 

[Nibble]

The problem with going to the school or Police is that it may have repurcussions outside of school if they live near you. It has to be a short burst of intense and devastatingly effective violence and it will all be over.

 

[bhaexpress]

All well and good to go on about retailation but these things can escalate. Lots of kids now carry knives and we all know where that leads. The point is that you need to impress upon the school that they need to take some very positive action as let's face it, unless they're very stupid they will know who the bullies are.

Legal action is the best way for the simple reason that no matter how much you are provoked taking the law into your own hands makes you the bad guy, especially in the eyes of a court.

What is so sickening is that so many kids who should be excluded are not because of their weak education authorities. This helps neither staff or pupils. What is also needed are stiffer penalties for the parents of these little bastards.

 

[Shegull]

My eldest son was being bullied and I took what I thought was the best approach by asking his teacher if she could just keep on eye on the situation for me for a day of so to let me decide on the best approach. The bully was his "friend" and the son of my "friend". The teacher took it into her own hands and approached this guy - lifted him out of it - got him upset - the mother rang me upset - she nearly killed him and finally made him apologise to my son - but in the end of it all I found it very hard to be mates any more and things were never the same between us and eventually our friendship dwindled out.

The best form of defence is attack and face the problem head on by approaching the culprit or the parents.