o/t Sharing a joke

[Couldn't Be Hyypia]

I went to the Library at lunchtime:

Me: Do you have that book about the very small penises?
Librarian: I'm sorry, it isn't in yet.
Me: Yep. That's the one

 

[Frutos]

My biology teacher tried to explain chromosomes to us using a biblical metaphor. Apparently XY is Adam, XX is Eve, and YYY, Delilah.

 

[Insel affe]

Why does piglet smell ?

Because he plays with Pooh.

 

[Couldn't Be Hyypia]

Combine Harvesters
.
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.
.
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And you'll have one really big crappy restaurant.

 

[essbee1]

I went to the Library at lunchtime:

Me: Do you have that book about the very small penises?
Librarian: I'm sorry, it isn't in yet.
Me: Yep. That's the one

Clearly - the librarian means the book - so how could you come back with that reply?

Poor and sloppy use of words and not really a joke. 0/10

 

[Wrong-Direction]

I bought some trainers off a drug dealer, I dunno what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day!

Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk

 

[JamesAndTheGiantHead]

What time does Sean Connery usually arrive at Wimbledon?

Tennish.

 

[Couldn't Be Hyypia]

How many chameleons do you think sneaked onto The Ark?

 

[Biscuit]

I'm selling my Hoover.

Well, it was just collecting dust.

 

[AmexRuislip]

Why does the Swedish navy have barcodes on their ships?

So that when arriving in to port the harbour master can Scandinavian

 

[KVLT]

Once saw a red-haired amateur comic say this:

My friends call me 'The Fox'.
You're probably thinking 'Hey, that's pretty cool'.
'Is it because of your red hair? Or maybe because you're cunning and sly?'
No, the reason they call me The Fox is the women who chase me are dogs!

 

[LANGDON SEAGULL]

Sophie Ellis Bextor was found dead in the Real Madrid managers office.

Murder on Zidane's floor


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Triggaaar]

I went to the Library at lunchtime:

Me: Do you have that book about the very small penises?
Librarian: I'm sorry, it isn't in yet.
Me: Yep. That's the one

Clearly - the librarian means the book - so how could you come back with that reply?

Librarian reads the title of the book, and you reply 'yes, that's the one'. Seems to make sense to me, although...

Poor and sloppy use of words

I do agree with you there. Surely if you had a small penis (I'm just guessing you understand ), you wouldn't be saying 'I'm sorry, it isn't in yet', you'd say 'I'm sorry, it's already in'.

So for the sake of the joke:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: Are you sure it's in?
Me: Yep. That's the one.

Or, more realistically:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: I thought I recognised you.

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

My friend gave up a good steady job to retrain as an archaeologist.
His career now lies in ruins.

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

Crystal Palace have just put Dougie Freedman back on the payroll

 

[Shirty]

Librarian reads the title of the book, and you reply 'yes, that's the one'. Seems to make sense to me, although...
I do agree with you there. Surely if you had a small penis (I'm just guessing you understand ), you wouldn't be saying 'I'm sorry, it isn't in yet', you'd say 'I'm sorry, it's already in'.

So for the sake of the joke:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: Are you sure it's in?
Me: Yep. That's the one.

Or, more realistically:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: I thought I recognised you.

You don't buy books from a library.

 

[DavidRyder]

Librarian reads the title of the book, and you reply 'yes, that's the one'. Seems to make sense to me, although...
I do agree with you there. Surely if you had a small penis (I'm just guessing you understand ), you wouldn't be saying 'I'm sorry, it isn't in yet', you'd say 'I'm sorry, it's already in'.

So for the sake of the joke:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: Are you sure it's in?
Me: Yep. That's the one.

Or, more realistically:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: I thought I recognised you.

What are you buying a book in a library for when you can loan it for free?

 

[pearl]

Librarian reads the title of the book, and you reply 'yes, that's the one'. Seems to make sense to me, although...
I do agree with you there. Surely if you had a small penis (I'm just guessing you understand ), you wouldn't be saying 'I'm sorry, it isn't in yet', you'd say 'I'm sorry, it's already in'.

So for the sake of the joke:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: Are you sure it's in?
Me: Yep. That's the one.

Or, more realistically:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: I thought I recognised you.

You: I'd like to borrow the book on small penises
Librarian: I can't locate it at the moment

 

[el punal]

Man in a doctor's surgery.

Man : "Doctor, I've got a golf ball stuck up my arse."

Doctor : "Well drop your trousers and pants and bend over."

Doctor : "Ah yes. I can see it now . . . it seems to have gone up a fairway."

 

[essbee1]

Librarian reads the title of the book, and you reply 'yes, that's the one'. Seems to make sense to me, although...
I do agree with you there. Surely if you had a small penis (I'm just guessing you understand ), you wouldn't be saying 'I'm sorry, it isn't in yet', you'd say 'I'm sorry, it's already in'.

So for the sake of the joke:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: Are you sure it's in?
Me: Yep. That's the one.

Or, more realistically:
Me: I'd like to buy the book about very small penises?
Librarian: I thought I recognised you.

Rubbish - nowhere does the librarian or the user name the book title in the script.

Oh ok - the librarian is a mind-reader and so too is the user? Now that make sense.

So the lines should be:

A mind-reader walks into a library.
The librarian says "fu**k off - the book's not in yet".
User: "I'll come back another time".