Mental health. Please talk to others.

[Wardy's twin]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41599714

Really interesting read this morning. My wife has had unbelievable anxiety issues, since our youngest was born a couple of years ago, it's been seriously tough and we're still at the start of the journey. She's only just accepted she needs to talk to someone - her first appointment is three hours from now. The struggles for the individual are unimaginable, but the added pressure that puts on your family is easy to underestimate. She finds it very difficult to leave the house, and since I work in London she panics when I have to leave to go to work - she's convinced something bad is going to happen. She incessantly reads the news and social media looking out for terrorist attacks etc. She freaks out if a helicopter, or plane flies overhead. Occasionally a chinook flies near by where we live, no idea what they are up to but those are the worst times as she thinks it means impending war.

I guess it's hard to identify these feelings once they start in yourself, or in others. I'm really hopeful that today goes well and she's not disheartened by it.

Persevere.... I know its hard, been there myself and as this thread shows it is not a simple problem and so there is no simple solution as we are all different. Today I am much, much better but that took time. PM me if you want to chat about it.

 

[Grizz]

My other half was the same, though not as bad as your wife sounds, he had a fear of death from just the simplest of things, like catching a cold. It's taken us 10 months from when he first agreed to see someone to where we are now and the change is immense. He's on tablets, but they've found the right ones and right dosage. He's completed a CBT course and changed his diet around and cut out the caffeine. It's like having my Chris back, he uses his CBT techniques when he gets anxious, he's able to go back to work know, we socialise, we go into town now and he's very relaxed. So what I'm trying to say is, seeking help is the first step on a long journey and it works. It'll be hard, you and them will have bad days, but keep going and make sure that you look after your own health, that is very important.

 

[FatSuperman]

Thanks both. We'll see how the counsellor goes today as the first step. She been convinced to go out and stay at a friends tonight as well, so hopefully she'll have a bit of fun. The 12 year old will be happy as well because he gets away with murder when it's 'boys night'.

It's another reason I've not been able to go to a match for so long - anything with massive crowds is a huge risk

 

[Thunder Bolt]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41599714

Really interesting read this morning. My wife has had unbelievable anxiety issues, since our youngest was born a couple of years ago, it's been seriously tough and we're still at the start of the journey. She's only just accepted she needs to talk to someone - her first appointment is three hours from now. The struggles for the individual are unimaginable, but the added pressure that puts on your family is easy to underestimate. She finds it very difficult to leave the house, and since I work in London she panics when I have to leave to go to work - she's convinced something bad is going to happen. She incessantly reads the news and social media looking out for terrorist attacks etc. She freaks out if a helicopter, or plane flies overhead. Occasionally a chinook flies near by where we live, no idea what they are up to but those are the worst times as she thinks it means impending war.

I guess it's hard to identify these feelings once they start in yourself, or in others. I'm really hopeful that today goes well and she's not disheartened by it.

It could be post natal depression as you mention it started after your youngest was born. It is quite common, but often goes untreated. Hormones can be very disruptive to a woman's health after childbirth. I hope the appointment goes well.

 

[black & white seagull]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41599714

Really interesting read this morning. My wife has had unbelievable anxiety issues, since our youngest was born a couple of years ago, it's been seriously tough and we're still at the start of the journey. She's only just accepted she needs to talk to someone - her first appointment is three hours from now. The struggles for the individual are unimaginable, but the added pressure that puts on your family is easy to underestimate. She finds it very difficult to leave the house, and since I work in London she panics when I have to leave to go to work - she's convinced something bad is going to happen. She incessantly reads the news and social media looking out for terrorist attacks etc. She freaks out if a helicopter, or plane flies overhead. Occasionally a chinook flies near by where we live, no idea what they are up to but those are the worst times as she thinks it means impending war.

I guess it's hard to identify these feelings once they start in yourself, or in others. I'm really hopeful that today goes well and she's not disheartened by it.

That sounds absolutely debilitating. I wish her all the best with her appointment, and hope it's the first step towards recovery.

 

[Grombleton]

Having a hard time of it recently. Sometimes its hard to see the good in life.

 

[FatSuperman]

Having a hard time of it recently. Sometimes its hard to see the good in life.

I know what you mean. And often when people tell you to stop and have a think about the good things, it makes no real difference - you're just not in that frame of mind. Still, every time I get low I go and speak to my toddlers. They will usually tell me that want to do a pooh and I have to look at it, which is actually a lot more helpful than it sounds.

I'm blessed that I've not struggled with mental health issues so far, but I have so many friends and family that have a really tough time that I am astounded that it's so poorly reported and discussed - in my circles at least. It also makes me wonder whether this is becoming worse due to the type of society we in 'the West' live in, no real threats to our life, just the constant struggle to improve your lot, against an almost impossible wall of things that stop that.

On the rare occasion that I stop to think about the grand scheme of things, it all just seems so insignificant. I choose to always live much more in the moment, I try to enjoy every day for what it is and to bring as much happiness as I can. I appreciate that mind set probably isn't easy for everyone to switch to.

 

[Thunder Bolt]

I know what you mean. And often when people tell you to stop and have a think about the good things, it makes no real difference - you're just not in that frame of mind. Still, every time I get low I go and speak to my toddlers. They will usually tell me that want to do a pooh and I have to look at it, which is actually a lot more helpful than it sounds.

I'm blessed that I've not struggled with mental health issues so far, but I have so many friends and family that have a really tough time that I am astounded that it's so poorly reported and discussed - in my circles at least. It also makes me wonder whether this is becoming worse due to the type of society we in 'the West' live in, no real threats to our life, just the constant struggle to improve your lot, against an almost impossible wall of things that stop that.

On the rare occasion that I stop to think about the grand scheme of things, it all just seems so insignificant. I choose to always live much more in the moment, I try to enjoy every day for what it is and to bring as much happiness as I can. I appreciate that mind set probably isn't easy for everyone to switch to.

One day at a time. You can't change yesterday, and tomorrow isn't here yet.

 

[Brovion]

100% correct - Mental health issues have nothing at all to do with weakness.

As I posted last month: in the last year I have battled (& hopefully beaten) bowel & liver cancer, coming to terms with the result of the treatment (permanent colostomy bag) and the deep depression & insomnia it all triggered & separated from my wife & kids.

I'm not restating this for any praise or out of self-pity (though I've been consumed with that at times).

I'm repeating this because I'm getting through this by talking and seeking help. And by doing so the love and support I've received has been overwhelming & has given me the strength to carry on.

Blimey, fair play to you. I'm not sure if the words of a stranger on an internet messageboard can possibly help you in any way - but you have my respect and admiration regardless.


EDIT: And that goes for everybody else posting ion this thread as well.

 

[maffew]

[MENTION=20792]spongy[/MENTION] op hope you are ok mate just a thank you for starting this thread it's inspiring and thanks to Goldstone76 for blocking that **** spence from it

 

[spongy]

Yeah I'm ok mate. Cheers for asking. We'll I am apart from the fact I caught my thumb in my press brake today. Just waiting for the bruising to come out and my nail to fall off. Mind you I'm lucky I didn't cut the bugger off!

Funnily enough I was looking through my phone yesterday and I still have his number in it. I can't delete it just yet.

 

[marlowe]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/football/41599714

Really interesting read this morning. My wife has had unbelievable anxiety issues, since our youngest was born a couple of years ago, it's been seriously tough and we're still at the start of the journey. She's only just accepted she needs to talk to someone - her first appointment is three hours from now. The struggles for the individual are unimaginable, but the added pressure that puts on your family is easy to underestimate. She finds it very difficult to leave the house, and since I work in London she panics when I have to leave to go to work - she's convinced something bad is going to happen. She incessantly reads the news and social media looking out for terrorist attacks etc. She freaks out if a helicopter, or plane flies overhead. Occasionally a chinook flies near by where we live, no idea what they are up to but those are the worst times as she thinks it means impending war.

I guess it's hard to identify these feelings once they start in yourself, or in others. I'm really hopeful that today goes well and she's not disheartened by it.

It could be post natal depression as you mention it started after your youngest was born. It is quite common, but often goes untreated. Hormones can be very disruptive to a woman's health after childbirth. I hope the appointment goes well.

I think when it's that bad it's a more extreme form of post natal depression called postpartum psychosis.
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Postpartum_psychosis