jokes that are so bad they're good

[Normal Rob]

How does an Indian mend his trousers?

With apache.

 

[Easy 10]

Whats brown and sticky ?

A stick.

 

[Box of Frogs]

How much does a Cockney girl pay for shampoo?

Pantene.

 

[Titanic]

A couple of Mississippi hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head.

The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?"

The operator, in a calm soothing voice, says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."

There is a silence, then a shot is heard.

The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"

 

[TWOCHOICEStom]

Guess who I bumped into in Specsavers today?






f***ing EVERYONE!

 

[BIG GAY AL]

whats black and rhymes with snoop?


Dr. Dre

 

[maffew]

What did the egg say to the boling water?


It might take me a while to get hard, I just got laid by a chick

 

[Garage_Doors]

Whats Blue & white and if falls from a tree can kill you ?


Fridge with a denim jacket on.

 

[Garage_Doors]

What do you call a fish with no eyes ?

fsh.

works better vocally


What do you call a dear with no eyes

No idea.


what do you call a dear with no eyes and no legs ?

Still no idea

again works better vocally

 

[Garage_Doors]

What do you call a boomerang that don't come back ?

a Stick.

 

[Garage_Doors]

Where did Saddam keep his Cd collection.

In Iraq.

 

[Danny-Boy]

I watched the last London marathon, which featured one runner dressed as a chicken, and another dressed as an egg.
I thought "This could get interesting..."

 

[Lord Bracknell]

Did you hear about the hypochondriac who went to a champagne party ?
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[Danny-Boy]

What do you call James T Kirk's bowel movements?

A Captain's Log...

 

[bhaexpress]

Why did the one handed man cross the road ?

To get to the second hand shop.

 

[Garage_Doors]

Two nuns in the bath, one says wears the soap, the other replies,
Yes doesn't it ?

 

[The Wizard]

Two nuns in the bath, one says wears the soap, the other replies,
Yes doesn't it ?

 

[Brovion]

What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

 

[Brovion]

Oh dear... Does someone want to explain it to him?

 

[The Wizard]

Oh dear... Does someone want to explain it to him?

Yes please.