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Female/Male Dumpees

Dumpees

  • Women move on and have got someone else in line

    Votes: 20 48.8%
  • Women are the same at the end

    Votes: 10 24.4%
  • Males move on quicker

    Votes: 6 14.6%
  • Fence

    Votes: 5 12.2%

  • Total voters
    41
  • Poll closed .


Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,097
Lancing
Is this statement true ?.

Male dumpers are much more likely to come back than female dumpers. Three reasons:

(1) Females generally check out of the relationship before the breakup actually occurs and are less likely to carry any feelings beyond the break.

(2) Females tend to have a better support network of friends and family.

(3) Females usually have an easier time finding male attention to fill the void from the breakup.
 






larus

Well-known member
Too simplistic. So much depends on the person.

A lot of men can be quite 'needy' (ignore all the macho bullshit), and although they don't want to be with that person, can't bear being by themself. Women can be just the same; scared of being alone.

You tend to find the people who don't go back are those who have a fiulfilling life and are content.

Mind you; I could be talking b***ocks I suppose.
 


Gully

Monkey in a seagull suit.
Apr 24, 2004
16,812
Way out west
Never go back to a firework that has failed to ignite properly, there is a fair chance it will blow up in your face.
 


Durlston

"You plonker, Rodney!"
Jul 15, 2009
10,017
Haywards Heath
Women cheat on you, rip your heart out and then pretend to feel guilt when you have a breakdown. Still got a few emotional scars.:cry:
 




Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,097
Lancing
I feel DREADFUL today. Really bad.
 


Beach Hut

Brighton Bhuna Boy
Jul 5, 2003
72,323
Living In a Box
Well it does really depend whether you pick the right woman
 


Lady Bracknell

Handbag at Dawn
Jul 5, 2003
4,514
The Metropolis
I don't think it is possible to make any generalisations about the break-up of relationships. Each one is different and it is often fairly academic who makes the first move to end a relationship since things will have been going wrong in the lead up to the finding ending.

Some people do play unpleasant games that involve breaking up when not actually wanting to end the relationship but this will be based on their need for attention and actually, it is often much better to take them at their word!

A friend of mine once said that he knew a relationship was over the minute he heard the words "I'm not sure what I want..." because actually, whatever was wanted wasn't going to be him. I'd simply add that it is rarely worth going back for a repeat of what didn't end happily the first time.
 






Ninja Elephant

Doctor Elephant
Feb 16, 2009
18,855
Number 2 is spot on, they have a much better support network.

Amazingly, I've found myself a girlfriend. She's lovely, and her best friend likes me. Which means we have a good relationship. If her best friend didn't like me, then I would be slightly concerned.
 








SirDouglasLoft

New member
Jul 4, 2008
6,876
Women cheat on you, rip your heart out and then pretend to feel guilt when you have a breakdown. Still got a few emotional scars.:cry:

Exactly how I still feel mate. No chance of me going back though!
 


Spanish Seagulls

Well-known member
Nov 18, 2007
2,915
Ladbroke Grove
I don't think it is possible to make any generalisations about the break-up of relationships. Each one is different and it is often fairly academic who makes the first move to end a relationship since things will have been going wrong in the lead up to the finding ending.

Some people do play unpleasant games that involve breaking up when not actually wanting to end the relationship but this will be based on their need for attention and actually, it is often much better to take them at their word!

A friend of mine once said that he knew a relationship was over the minute he heard the words "I'm not sure what I want..." because actually, whatever was wanted wasn't going to be him. I'd simply add that it is rarely worth going back for a repeat of what didn't end happily the first time.

I agree, you really cannot judge as so much depends on the individuals involved & what else is going on in their lives. people generally have someone to move onto when things have been going wrong anyway & they are not strong enough to be alone to work out who they are & what they want from life. That is when it takes another person to come along to give them the direction they need / want to make the change. All the while someone is not committed & just needing the next body to move onto they are just making the relationship worthless & a breeding platform for resentment which is why there is often bitterness & unhappiness. Many people get into a cycle of breaking up to make up when there is something missing in the relationship but nobody presents themselves to provide the escape. It's all a bit sad that people cannot be true to themselves let alone to their outgoing partner.
When somebody moves onto another partner in order to break from their current relationship it is often because they fear being alone, are afraid of the unknown when really if they were smart enough they would find out that the time alone is the only time they will ever find their true selves & actually be someone who is worthy of love & respect.
It is such a complicated subject with everyone having different experiences but the one thing I have found in my almost 43 years is that love is a splendid thing but can only be found when you have learnt to love yourself.
 




Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,097
Lancing
I bad day yesterday peeps but I will dust myself off. Just wish the dreams would stop.
 


Father Jack

New member
Aug 21, 2005
1,708
Tough one. Women have a good support network, but knowone has mentioned the rebound. Males and females after being dumped all of a sudden become more social with their friends. Yet the thought that the other might be doing the same leaves a bitter taste in the mouth.
 


Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,097
Lancing
I think how old you are makes a difference. At 47 where the f*** do I go now ?. Not that I want to as I have been too badly hurt to consider any sort of dating for sometime. When I was in my 20's when the relationship ended it was down the disco with my mates next weekend and invariably getting back on the pull. Now , well its a meal for one and the eurovision for me tonight :thumbsup::cry:
 
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Uncle Spielberg

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
43,097
Lancing
Its certainly true Women have far more opportunities. My ex has probably been hit on hundreds of times this year whereas I am off the radar.
 


sjamesb3466

Well-known member
Jan 31, 2009
5,198
Leicester
Get out there US and get back in the game. There's no point in sitting at home feeling sorry for yourself. You need to make a positive step mate. I realise its a tough and scary prospect of trying to start a new relationship but 47 isn't old man. You see people in their 80's finding new love so there's no excuses from you!! Get down the pub and get your swagger on :thumbsup:
 


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