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Does anyone have any Jokes?
- Thread starter seagullsdaz
- Start date
Iamapen15
New member
Quiet night. Man sitting at home on the porch with his wife.
He says, "I love you."
She asks, "Is that you or the beer talking?"
He replies, "It's me............. talking to the beer."
He says, "I love you."
She asks, "Is that you or the beer talking?"
He replies, "It's me............. talking to the beer."
magoo
New member
I mistakenly drank some tipp-ex last night thinking it was liquid viagra. Woke up with a massive correction.
sydney
tinky ****in winky
sheffield wednesday
Pretty pink fairy
Banned
- Jan 30, 2008
- 31,981
a man goes out on the town one friday night and gets pissed out of his mind, he wakes up the next morning to a ugly fat sweaty bird who was snoring and grunting and farting , he thinks to himself thank f*** for that at least i made it home.
magoo
New member
A bit of Tommy Cooper,
A doctor says to this 83 year old man that marrying a 19 year old woman could be fatal. He says "If she dies, she dies..."
A doctor says to this 83 year old man that marrying a 19 year old woman could be fatal. He says "If she dies, she dies..."
Pretty pink fairy
Banned
- Jan 30, 2008
- 31,981
Pretty pink fairy
Banned
- Jan 30, 2008
- 31,981
isn't that called unexpected sex?
Norman Potting
Well-known member
seagullsdaz
New member
- Thread starter
- #110
I was driving through a village today and saw a sign which read 'Max Speed 20'
I thought "Happy birthday Max. Have a great day"
I thought "Happy birthday Max. Have a great day"
Iamapen15
New member
Where do naughty shapes go?
To prism
To prism
Iamapen15
New member
What sits in a tree and drips blood?
Sanitary owl
Sanitary owl
Results just in from the Salva
dor Dali Football League....
Real Madrid; 1 : Surreal Madrid; Fish
dor Dali Football League....
Real Madrid; 1 : Surreal Madrid; Fish
magoo
New member
How do you catch a japanese prostitute?
In fishnets.
In fishnets.
rocker959
Well-known member
Went Dogging with the wife last night......by the time she had finished parking everyone had f**ked off !!
I remember when we were courting I used to have to pull my wifes knickers to one side to get to her arse........
Now I have to pull her arse to one side to get to her knickers !!
I remember when we were courting I used to have to pull my wifes knickers to one side to get to her arse........
Now I have to pull her arse to one side to get to her knickers !!
sydney
tinky ****in winky
got my sleeping pills and my viagra mixed up last night , ended up having forty wanks
Snail goes up to a bar in a pub and orders a pint of beer. Barman says they don't serve snails, picks it up and throws it out the door.
Exactly one year later, the door to the pub opens and the snail is in the doorway and says to the barman "Why did you do that?".
Exactly one year later, the door to the pub opens and the snail is in the doorway and says to the barman "Why did you do that?".
seagullsdaz
New member
- Thread starter
- #119
Was in the gym earlier and decided to jump on the treadmill
People were giving me weird looks, so i started jogging instead
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I recently had to quit my skiing career
It was going down hill too fast
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I walked into a bar last night and ordered a double
The barman brought out a bloke who looked just like me
People were giving me weird looks, so i started jogging instead
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I recently had to quit my skiing career
It was going down hill too fast
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I walked into a bar last night and ordered a double
The barman brought out a bloke who looked just like me
Last edited:
seagull_special
Well-known member
what do you call an epileptic lettuce?
Seizure salad
Seizure salad