completely plausible but FALSE facts about NSCers

[Titanic]

"Hove Born & Bred" and "Uncle Speilberg" are in a civil partnership.

 

[Amsterdam Albion]

Amshterdam Albion has been for 'coffee' in his lunch break.

Amsterdam Albion went to the Red Light District during his lunch and claimed it on expenses!

 

[The Large One]

The top row of the Space Invaders characters was based on the facial expression Bens Grandad gave when he was goosed by the late Harry Bloom.

 

[El Presidente]

John Bumlick carshares each morning with London Irish

 

[Mendoza]

El Presidente's porn stash if filed in alphabetical order along one REALLY long shelf can stretch the entire length of the M25, G is the most popular letter.

 

[simmo]

BrightonHaHa has every Guinness Book of Records since 1981.

 

[Perry Milkins]

Bakesy has now left the UK to become a goat herder in Paraguay.

 

[simmo]

Cecil once owned a conker that went undefeated through the whole of Autumn and ended up a 264er.

 

[Titanic]

Freddie Goodwin should be out with HB&B looking for a job, the redundancy money won't last long at todays prices (although Sir Fred might just be slightly better placed to ride out the storm).

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Man of Harveys operated one of the Daleks, alongside Partick Troughton, in the original series of Doctor Who. He was only six at the time.

 

[hans kraay fan club]

Juan Albion is a member of a survivalist cult, based in the woods in Idaho.

 

[Perry Milkins]

Uncle Buck has shares in a condom factory in Estonia

 

[Titanic]

Hans Kraay Fan Club hold their AGM in his kitchen - the secretary is a budgie and the only other member is a rather crusty looking sausage roll.

 

[The Large One]

Collar Feeler is a misnomer. He also feels cuffs and buttonholes as well.

 

[User removed 4]

the large one designs flat caps for dunn & co gents outfitters.

 

[simmo]

Sheebo is allergic to Kelloggs cornflakes and all other cereals made by Kelloggs. However, it is only Kelloggs products, he is NOT allergic to products made by other cereal makers, including supermarket own brands.

 

[Titanic]

Simmo appeared on posters in the governments abortive 'Just Say No' campaign.

 

[Man of Harveys]

Lord Bracknell once dried a leaf from a Swiss cheese plant and smoked it

 

[Perry Milkins]

Man of Harveys once wrote a childrens fable entitled 'Sammy Squirrel and the Old Witch from Purley'.

 

[Titanic]

Uncle Spielberg was furiously ranting at his TV when Bad Lashes were voted off X-Factor.