Childish rhymes - Please contribute

[Sonic]

My friend Billy's got a ten foot willy and he showed it to the girl next door,
She thought it was a snake, So she hit it with a rake, And now it's only four foot four!



Next.....

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

they are shit, bhafc.net

mejona will win the spoon, i bet

taxi please.

the best childish one is about batman and robin to jingle bells tune, cant be arsed to write it all though!

 

[GUNTER]

You are not the Sonic who lives in Withdean
with your music knowledge you are very keen

 

[The Large One]

We break up, we break down
We don't care if the school falls down
No more English, no more French
No more sitting on the old bench

If the teacher re-appears
Lay her down and box her ears
If that does to serve her right
Blow her up with dynamite

 

[bhaexpress]

There was a young lady from Tottenham
Whose manners you'd think she'd forgotten them
One day at the Vicars
She took off her knickers
Because she said she was hot in 'em.

 

[Braders]

fatty and skinny went to bed
fatty blew off and skinny was dead

 

[skr80]

http://www.lyons.mcmail.com/playgroundsongs/

similar....

 

[The Large One]

Skinny said to Fatty 'ooh arent you a slob
'Your tum is such a floppy one, it must obscure your nob
'Doesn't that annoy you when you're on the job?
Said Fatty, 'I'm a girlie', and punched him in the gob.

 

[Easy 10]

Make up, make up
Never ever break up
If you do you'll catch the flu
And that will be the end of you.

 

[Sonic]

Make up, make up
Never ever break up
If you do you'll catch the flu
And that will be the end of you.

That's more like it. I was after things you remember saying in the playground, not just childish things you can make up off the top of your head. Good one Easy.

 

[Lammy]

Totally unPC but here goes... (remember I was a child at the time)

Ching Chong Chinaman went to milk a cow
Ching Chong Chinaman didn't know how
Ching Chong Chinaman pulled the wrong tit
Ching Chong Chinaman got covered in ****

(for added effect you may wish to pull ones eye lids into the 'japs eye" position)

 

[Lady Whistledown]

Scooby Dooby Doo
Did a poo
In one of Shaggy's slippers
Shaggy put it on
What a pong
It made him shake and shiver.

A primary school classic

 

[Easy 10]

That's more like it. I was after things you remember saying in the playground, not just childish things you can make up off the top of your head. Good one Easy.

Whaddya mean "playground" ?
I had to use that to calm down a couple of mates when one of them caught the other one looking at his pint.

 

[AmexRuislip]

Old mother Hubbard went to her cupboard, to get her poor doggy a bone.
As she bent over,
Up stepped Rover,
And gave her a bone of his own.

 

[Algernon]

Milk milk lemonade.
Round the corner chocolate's made.

Isn't it a pity that the lady in the city got a hitty on the titty with a hard boiled egg.

 

[Frutos]

There once was a man from Nantucket...but the stories about him were a gross exaggeration.

 

[AmexRuislip]

I'll probably go to hell for this, oh well.
Dyslexic nursery rhyme:

Old MacDonald had a farm
Z B Q D Y............

 

[Jack Straw]

To the tune of TV show "Out of Town" (with Jack Hargreaves);
Say what you will,
school dinners make you ill.
I know someone who died of Shepherd's Pie.
And school din-dins,
come from pig-bins,
Ouuuut of town!

 

[GT49er]

To the tune of TV show "Out of Town" (with Jack Hargreaves);
Say what you will,
school dinners make you ill.
I know someone who died of Shepherd's Pie.
And school din-dins,
come from pig-bins,
Ouuuut of town!

Only ever knew the first two lines of that!

 

[Pevenseagull]

Something along the lines of

Jesus Christ
Did a skid
Knackered his balls
On a dustbin lid