Best rhyme in a song

[Tyrone Biggums]

Rhymes aplenty in this classic too.

well you tried it just for once found it all right for kicks.
but now you found out that it's a habit that sticks.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
sneaking in the back door with dirty magazines.
now your mother wants to know what all those stains on your jeans.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
uh huh, uh huh, uhhhhh, uhhhhh [x3]
you get in a heat, you get in a sulk.
but you still keep a beating your meat to pulp.
and you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
you're a kid cassanova. you're a no-josep
it's a labour of love ****ing yourself to death.
orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
uh huh, uhhhhh [x10]
you're makin' out with school kids, winos and heads of state.
you even made it with the lady,
who puts the little plastic bobins on the christmas cakes.
butchers' assistants and bellhops, you've had them all here and there.
children of god and their joy-strings, international women with no body hair.
oooh, so where they're askin' in an alley and your voice ain't steady.
if your sex mechanic's rough you're more than ready.
you're an orgasm addict.
you're an orgasm addict.
johnny want ****ie always and all ways.
he's got the energy, he will amaze.
he's an orgasm addict.
he's an orgasm addict.
he's always at it.
he's always at it.
and he's an orgasm addict.
he's an orgasm addict.

 

[BadFish]

"I'm the king of Boogle, the instant higher
I get 11 point for the word Quagmire"

She's the cheese and I'm the macaroni

 

[Playing On The Grit]

I drive a Rolls Royce
Cause it's good for my voice

Children of the Revolution by T Rex

 

[Carrot Cruncher]

It's alright to say things can only get betterr
You haven't lost your brand new sweater

Pure new wool and perfect stitches, not the kind of jumper that makes you itches, oh no...

Personally, the first 2 verses are my favourite, especially the 2nd.

My, brother, knows, Karl Marx,
He met him eating mushrooms in the peoples park,
He said 'What do you think about my manifesto?'
'I like a manifesto, put it to the test-o.'

Took it straight down to meet the anarchist's party.
I met a groovy guy, he was arty farty,
He said 'I know a little latin man a cus man a kai'
I said 'I don't know what it means' he said 'neither do I'


Dull insight into my life - the analyser in the lab that measures testosterone displays it as 'Testo'. Puts 'Where's Me Jumper' in my head whenever I see it. No bad thing!

 

[Carrot Cruncher]

'Writing frightening verse to a buck-toothed girl from Luxembourg.'

'Frankly Mr Shankly since you asked, you are a flatulent pain in the arse.'

 

[CorgiRegisteredFriend]

Many of Half Man Half Biscuit's brilliantly satirical lines are also excellent rhymes. but three of their best are:

Did you play in the Garden of Eden?
Were the goalkeeper’s gloves to you tossed?
‘Cos it seems to me you’re the reason
You’re the reason why Paradise Lost.

Well we’ve both seen your personalised reg plates
And it’s not the worst crime I agree
But we both know full well, that it really should spell
T-W-A-T-O-N-E.

And:

She stayed with me until, she moved to Notting Hill
She said it was the place she needs to be
Where the cocaine is fair trade, and frequently displayed
Is the Buena Vista Social Club CD

Was hoping for some half man half biscuit- trust you are aware of this site
http://www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/

 

[5Ways Gull]

Better stay away from him - he'll rip your lungs out Jim - Warren Zevon

 

[5Ways Gull]

Teacher comes to break it up - back of the 'ead with a plastic cup. - Madness

 

[Albumen]

Im never fake and I'm never phony
I got more flava than a packet of macaroni

 

[Dr. Notthenineo'clocknews]

I'm sorry that she hit you with a full can of Coke....it's no joke




from the same band a lovely little ditty

and if you're going off to war
well I wish you well, but dont be sore
If I cheer the other team
cause killing people's not my scene
I prefer to give the inhabitents a say
before I blow their house away

 

[OzMike]

She said 'it grieves me so to see you in such pain'.
'I wish there was something I could do to make you smile again'.
I said 'I appreciate that and could you please explain about the 50 ways'.
She said 'why don't we both just sleep on it tonight and I believe that in the morning you'll begin to see the light'.
Then she kissed me and I realised she probably was right.
There must be 50 ways to leave your lover.

 

[wag chaser]

I look in the mirror but I cant be seen
Just a thin clean layer of Mr Sheen

 

[Bodian]

Floyd - "Shorter of breath and one day closer to death"

 

[Jesus Gul]

To my boys who hassle banks like Jimmy Floyd/Natwest, TSB and Lloyds,

 

[Peteinblack]

Was hoping for some half man half biscuit- trust you are aware of this site
http://www.chrisrand.com/hmhb/

 

[Dr. Notthenineo'clocknews]

my wife just burnt the scrambled egg
the dog just bit my leg
my teenage daughter ran away
my fine young son has turned out gay

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

Rebecca Black - Friday

Some snippets

"Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal"

"Yesterday was Thursday, Thursday
Today i-is Friday, Friday (Partyin')
We-we-we so excited
We so excited
We gonna have a ball today"

And the rap...which doesnt actually rhyme but I love regardless.

"R-B, Rebecca Black
So chillin' in the front seat (In the front seat)
In the back seat (In the back seat)
I'm drivin', cruisin' (Yeah, yeah)
Fast lanes, switchin' lanes
Wit' a car up on my side (Woo!)
(C'mon) Passin' by is a school bus in front of me
Makes tick tock, tick tock, wanna scream
Check my time, it's Friday, it's a weekend
We gonna have fun, c'mon, c'mon, y'all"

 

[The Legend that IS Lawro]

Forgot this one:

And fiery demons all dance
When you walk through that door
Don't say you're easy on me
You're about as easy as a nuclear war

 

[Kumquat]

One from Plan B

Gonna put a bandana on my head like Rambo
Shoot you on your doorstep like Jill Dando

 

[BadFish]

Goldie Looking Chain should get a look in here

The truth about this weed, it really is a shocker,
Smoked nearly ½ an ounce now I look like Hayley Cropper,

......

GM weed starts to....
It's the microchip stops you taking a piss,
Putting chemically enhanced weed in your spliffs,
Now I need viagra to get me a stiffs,

Oh shit my willy is a fanny!
Take a step back I'm turning into a tranny!
I start to panic, I'm getting cock rash
My bellends turning into a ****ing gash
Seen the doctor, nothing could be done
I smoked the weed and the changes began