Green Cross Code Man
Wunt be druv
Not that it matters for the sake of the thread, but I don't think 20 percent of the population is gay or bi sexual. Anything I've ever read suggests less than half that number.
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[Albion] "Albion dressing room would be supportive of gay player"
- Thread starter Frutos
- Start date
- Apr 5, 2014
- 25,921
Why should someone even have to mention they are gay? Do straight people say hello I’m straight
You're just not understanding it from the other person's view (which most do seem to understand here).
Coming out in sport, especially football, is a different process to someone coming out in mainstream life.
If a person ‘comes out’ in mainstream life it would generally only need to be for family and friends. A part of natural conversation, but one which takes courage as there is still fear, even now, over what reactions may be. Some of that fear may be imagined, but it can be very real- especially for a younger person who doesn’t want to become the subject of gossip and enquiry. Folk can be more confident of talking about their same sex relationships in the workplace as part of natural discourse because they have protections. The problem is, such natural conversation about outside work activities are still regarded as ‘in your face’ by a few cultural stragglers. Thus the fear is still fed. Anyone of the ‘as long as they keep it to themselves’ brigade, as some belong to here, is homophobic. Do they keep there own private lives out of normal conversation ?
In sport it is more complex. Lives are intruded upon. Especially in football. It’s not just the dressing room reaction. That is probably the least of a player’s worries, especially somewhere as culturally sensitive as the Premier League has arrived at. It is the outside reaction.
A player with a wife and family doesn’t have this problem. They have nothing to front. In an ideal world a player with a same sex partner wouldn’t either. They would just live in the same open and unfiltered way. But there is a problem. They are fearful of reactions. I was only looking at a football Facebook page last night that had a picture of Elton John at Watford. Yes, the comments came…
So a player stays reserved about themselves, saying nothing. Perhaps not having relationships. They do so knowing that if it comes out most will not care, but a significant group will make capital and treat them as a freak show. It’s just bantz isn’t it ?
Papers cannot ‘out’ people anymore. It is culturally unacceptable. But that doesn’t stop the diseased primates in Twitter doing their thing. It doesn’t stop the abuse from the terraces. And all the while the straight white conditioned males call out for a thick skin. They can’t and won’t understand.
If I was playing football at a professional level there is no way that I would talk about a same sex relationship when others were telling of their new girlfriends. The institution itself may be accommodating, but a look at FB or Twitter, or a reminder that even on forums such as this where a few still don’t want to hear it, and it’s back in the closet. I can understand why players don’t do it. They just don’t need the hassle.
Sorry to single you out, but your view, PPF and Portlock show there is still a long way to go. And this is a BRIGHTON forum. So imagine the amplification elsewhere.
People maybe but not 20% of all men, I doubt it. But its certainly not uncommon, though it might be more uncommon among footballers (due to dressing room atmospheres and so on). That said, there's obviously gay players in the PL - no doubt.
- Apr 5, 2014
- 25,921
For those who can't grasp this:
A gay footballer walks into his dressing room on a Monday. He’s not come out to anyone yet. Not even his family.
Team mate: ‘Me and my girlfriend are getting married’
Player ‘That’s wonderful, congratulations’
Team mate: ‘Do you have a girlfriend yet ?’
The player goes quiet. He is seeing a neighbour of his. The same sex.
He wants to tell the other player this is the case, knowing that player is not homophobic. But if he does it’s out. It can’t be retrieved.
He thinks of the wider issue of not keeping this relationship private. The over exposure of it. The pictures in MailOnline who will inevitably, but with the use of subtle and inside line legal language, want to put it out there for the salivating hoards.
He thinks about the Twitter comments from opposition fans, the shouts from the cars in the street, the quizzing that his family and friends might face from clandestine journalists. He ponders how his life will constantly be blighted by people making comments who think it’s just banter when all he wants is to be left alone like the player who has just got engaged will mostly be, or at least not sensationalised to people who want to abuse and cause grief.
Player ‘No, not yet’
As his team mate walks away the player looks longingly at him. If only he’d been born ‘normal’ like his newly engaged colleague.
A gay footballer walks into his dressing room on a Monday. He’s not come out to anyone yet. Not even his family.
Team mate: ‘Me and my girlfriend are getting married’
Player ‘That’s wonderful, congratulations’
Team mate: ‘Do you have a girlfriend yet ?’
The player goes quiet. He is seeing a neighbour of his. The same sex.
He wants to tell the other player this is the case, knowing that player is not homophobic. But if he does it’s out. It can’t be retrieved.
He thinks of the wider issue of not keeping this relationship private. The over exposure of it. The pictures in MailOnline who will inevitably, but with the use of subtle and inside line legal language, want to put it out there for the salivating hoards.
He thinks about the Twitter comments from opposition fans, the shouts from the cars in the street, the quizzing that his family and friends might face from clandestine journalists. He ponders how his life will constantly be blighted by people making comments who think it’s just banter when all he wants is to be left alone like the player who has just got engaged will mostly be, or at least not sensationalised to people who want to abuse and cause grief.
Player ‘No, not yet’
As his team mate walks away the player looks longingly at him. If only he’d been born ‘normal’ like his newly engaged colleague.
I'm sure you've already been told but your view is archaic and homophobic.
Football is a powerful tool for promoting good causes. Football is about inclusion. Football is for everyone and everyone must be made to feel welcome.
"Albion dressing room would be supportive of gay player"
I’m a little disappointed that they haven’t mentioned the dressing room would be supportive of a trans football player, I think they’re being one dimensional.
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I’m a little disappointed that they haven’t mentioned the dressing room would be supportive of a trans football player, I think they’re being one dimensional.
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Last edited:
sydney
tinky ****in winky
once you get past all the media bollox ...the question is ....does it really bother YOU..?
He said LGBTQ+...
- Mar 1, 2021
- 557
What point are you making here? Are you suggesting a known gay player shouldn't be selected because Qatar wouldn't like it? It would be an interesting test of FIFA'S credibility if that should happen.
Baldseagull
Well-known member
Yes, you are right, on self identification. It's 20%ish that have had any same sex relations.
Baldseagull
Well-known member
I am saying that internationally, coming out is more than just an invasion of privacy issue. Selection of an openly gay man to go and play in a tournament in a country where homosexuality is sometimes punishable by death, would be "awkward" and would require some additional consideration, it would not be done without a second thought, as selecting a heterosexual player could be.
Machiavelli
Well-known member
Wow, just wow!
One of only two posters I have on ignore. The other one is Totton
Thunder Bolt
Silly old bat
I know of several marriages that have broken up where the husband left their wives for men. Bisexual people are more common than people think.
super-seagulls
Soup! Why didn’t I get any Soup?
I have been tempted with the ignore feature, but I think it is like an ostrich burying its head in the sand as a lion nears!
Although, I love the idea of the whole forum ignoring these out-dated clowns on a mass scale. They would just be alone, congratulating each other because nobody challenges their backward views anymore!
Baker lite
Banned
This...could not give a cobblers toss about someone’s sexuality or race. Live and let live I say,let’s all try and be the best we can to each other.
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Danny Wilson Said
New member
I assume the NSC readership is representative of the population as a whole, so how many of the 10 percent of whatever of us who are LGBQT+ are out?
Danny Wilson Said
New member
PS to the above: Is it easier to be openly gay as a footballer or as a member of a football fans' forum?
nickbrighton
Well-known member
- Feb 19, 2016
- 2,132
Do you mean out on NSC. Or Out in general. I never intended to be "out" on NSC and although I have posted a fair number of times regarding LGBT issues which make it obvious that I am gay, its only in response to questions or statements that I feel need a reply to.
My husband is also a NSC contributor, but I dont think he has posted anything that would indicate he is gay. Does that make him closeted on here even though like me, we are "out" in real life
- Thread starter
- #120
