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Did an ambulance drive past when she was being named?

Nepotism. That sort of thing is rife among chickens.

Nina Simone. But only on particular songs. The worst being 'I got my hands, got my nose, got my belly button, got my pituitary gland, got my liver, got my kidneys, got my instep, etc.' Its just a great big peculiar quivering whine.

Ooh, I'm on a roll with this:

A boy is walking down the street when a car pulls up. "Hey sonny, I'll give you a couple of sweets if you come in the car" the boy replies "Hey mister, give me the whole bag and I'll come in your mouth"

Done.

A bit of lateral thinking required.

I still have a long way to go with the drafting process of this law. If you have lots of socks the same, then there is an element of repatriating the non-holed sock into some kind of sock quarantine, where it can be paired up with similar orphaned socks at some point in the future. If its part...

I have developed a law relating to socks (like Sod's Law or Murphy's Law) called Manx Shearwater's Law, and it goes like this: "If one of the pair of socks you are about to put on has a hole in it that renders the socks unwearable, then this will ALWAYS be in the second sock you put on, NEVER...

George at ASDA. For the dapper man about town.

That would make more sense, perhaps Neil Pringle is an idiot.

On the radio this morning, they claimed it was Bradley Wiggins (?????), Geri Halliwell (again, ????), Piers Morgan (understandable) and someone else who's name escapes me. Any idea what poor old Bradley's done to offend the six-fingered townsfolk of Lewes? Also, pats on the back being given...

Ha ha!