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Yes it would, their results would be expunged and wiped from the record books, this happened last season to Chester City in the Conference.

Nope...I was just about to ask if anyone had seen Matutu!

Perhaps we could have a whip round to find someone to do it for him! All the best Nige for a very speedy recovery, thanks for giving me a story from the Goldstone days that always puts a smile on people's faces when it is told!

...going through your wallet!

Nope, but went to watch River Plate play Huracan last March, best singing I have ever heard at a football match.

...just one tit then!

I think she looks far better now than before, back then she looks like a chavvy stick insect, now she is definitely on the cuddly side but bloody gorgeous with it!

It is hard to compare Giggs and Scholes as they aren't really the same type of player, it would be like comparing a cat and a dog, different species with their own qualities.

The roads are over-crowded, isn't it time that the police targeted motorists even harder. A campaign against those who speed excessively, drive uninsured, text while driving or do so whilst drunk or under the influence of drugs would rid the roads of people who are inconsiderate and a danger to...

You should be ok if you can prove that you were either slowing down or using a mobile phone...many people still seem to use mobile phones when at the wheel of a car, try claiming that it was inconsiderate of the child to run out and interrupt your call, the judge might be sympathetic!

I have heard of this happening, but also the contrary, where an employer was keen to employ ex-forces because he knew exactly what type of employee they would be...hard working, loyal, well presented, confident but not cocky, tell them to be somewhere at a certain time and they were there five...

Tell him that there are some, but by no means all, people who are theiving, lying and robbing bastards...it is a harsh lesson, but the sooner he learns that the easier life will be for him!

Only if it were considered a bribe!

GRFC - Generally random f***ing crap!

...boom, boom!

West Ham, if only to make it really difficult for the board at the club to fire Avram Grant, who seems to be a totally decent bloke, he really deserves a club who will treat him as a bloody human!

I have gone for 4-2 to the Albion, think we will get another bagfull but at the same time somewhat complacent in defence.

That is what I thought when they showed the pictures from the seaside village, totally trashed and barely a soul to be seen...where the hell did all the people go, I am pretty sure they can't all have been evacuated in time!

Think that must be where I remembered it from, possibly a British couple on the beach in Thailand, their small kid pointed out what was happening and they legged it pretty sharpish.

Isn't that one of the characteristics that means a tsunami is about to hit, along with frothing in the water, apparently!