Radio presenters saying the parents where irresponsible (Madeleine)

[hans kraay fan club]

Sorry, I was not connecting the two. I was saying something like:

A) We have some wonderfully perfect parents on here. Which is great.

and, unrelated to that:

B) Because of what is going on in Portugal right now, when Mads ran away yesterday I felt more panicked than I would have normally.

Fair enough.

None of us are claiming to be perfect parents. Only people without kids could possibly believe there was any such thing.

What we hope to be, is the best parents we can be. That, as you have said, involves making choices.

We just have to hope and pray that we make more good ones than bad.

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

you dont get a a book on how to be a parent. im sure many have done what they did. if they honestly thought that someone was going to open the window and snatch her then im sure they wouldnt have risked it. people are often experts in hindsight...

 

[Bozza]

As it is, the media have been very restrained to date.

Agreed.

As I was arriving at work yesterday, GWR FM (this region's version of Southern FM) were talking about the Madeleine story and the presenters were also turning on the parents. Like adrian29uk above, it was the first I'd heard of this since the story broke.

 

[Starry]

Like what, for example?

I don't know, I didn't mean I had specific things I do that I know are 'bad' just that some of our choices are not those that some people call 'good parenting' I know our school choices have been questioned on here, we have a family bed and I know that doesn't always go down well, we vaccinate on our terms and not those the NHS dictates to us, my son hunts/shoots with his father and I know some people think that is bad. Oh and I am raising them to be Leeds fans.

 

[Cheeky Monkey]

you dont get a a book on how to be a parent.

 

[Race]

Silly question maybe, but what do you mean by family bed?

 

[London Calling]

Quite and I am sure I do things for/with my children that others would think was not good parenting.

But children are too important and too precious to leave alone so I can go and have a dinner with friends a few hundred metres away in a completely separate building. If I knew a neighbour of mine had left their three babies alone at home unattended I'd be calling the police/nspcc on them.

I read yesterday about an eleven year old girl who was left alone for a morning and burnt the house down, social services and the like are now involved in that case. I don't see why this case is any different.

AND LEGALLY, CHILDREN UNDER 14 IN THIS COUNTRY CANNOT BE LEFT ALONE WITHOUT A PERSON 16 OR ABOVE.

THIS LAW IS BASED ON SOUND AND SENSIBLE APPROACH TO CARING FOR CHILDREN, IT SHOULD NOT STOP BECAUSE YOU ARE ON YOUR JOLLIES.

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

i withdraw my previous statemnt.

lets criticise the bastards

 

[Starry]

Silly question maybe, but what do you mean by family bed?

Co-sleeping, sharing a bed/room.

www.bygpub.com/natural/family-bed.htm

 

[Questions]

AND LEGALLY, CHILDREN UNDER 14 IN THIS COUNTRY CANNOT BE LEFT ALONE WITHOUT A PERSON 16 OR ABOVE.

THIS LAW IS BASED ON SOUND AND SENSIBLE APPROACH TO CARING FOR CHILDREN, IT SHOULD NOT STOP BECAUSE YOU ARE ON YOUR JOLLIES.

What the law says

There is no law that states the minimum age that a child can be left alone. However, it is an offence to leave a child alone when doing so puts him or her at risk.

How do you decide if you can safely leave a child alone?

There are many important things to consider before you decide to leave a child alone. These include:

the age of the child
the child's level of maturity and understanding
the place where child will be left
how long the child will be left alone, and how often
whether or not there are any other children in the household.

 

[rool]

Co-sleeping, sharing a bed/room.

www.bygpub.com/natural/family-bed.htm

I don't mean to hijack a very serious topic but I now have an image in my head of Starry and family in a bed like in Angela's Ashes.

It must be an Irish thing because I remember having to share a bed with an aunt and my cousin when visiting one year.

I hope you don't take offence starry, having read that link I can understand why you do it

 

[countrygull]

No parent can claim to be perfect - I don't. But I have never left a small child of mine alone in an empty building (not even home). It's not so much an expectation that somebody's going to break in - it's the risk of fire or accident. I hope so much this little girl is found safely, but be absolutely certain, as others have said, anything said here, on the radio, anywhere will be as nothing compared to what those poor parents are thinking themselves and are going through.

 

[Gritt23]

The radio presenter is only saying what a lot of other people are too. Sad as this is, it was totally avoidable.

I think that is very true, BUT, why does it all have to be debated so openly, do people not think the parents are thinking EXACTLY the same things, and are beating themselves up about it?

They just don't need all the media talking like that.

 

[The Wookiee]

Again, I read comments that only make me wish I was able to lead lives as perfect as some.

I took Mads swimming at my club yesterday afternoon and, when I got to the entrance barrier, I swiped my card. Unusually though Mads rushed though the turnstyle ahead of me. The security system is clever enough that if the same card is swiped shortly after it does not permit entrance so I was stuck on the other side of the turnstyle. Excited by the prospect of swimming, Mads ran ahead, round a corner and out of sight. By the time the receptionist had let me through and I gave chase, Mads had gone through one set of double doors, past all the squash courts, though another set of double doors and was running through the club room/bar area. I'd be telling fibs if I said that the current story dominating the headlines didn't lead to a slight sense of panic in me as I pursued my little girl.

But that was unavoidable

 

[keaton]

I think that is very true, BUT, why does it all have to be debated so openly, do people not think the parents are thinking EXACTLY the same things, and are beating themselves up about it?

They just don't need all the media talking like that.

Yes, obviously it's painful to the family but we live in an media age where everything is debated an in the news. it's uncomfortable for many people to have thier faults,errors or traumatic events published and debated in the press but that's the world we live. Years ago we certainly wouldn't debate the whether or not a war we were fighting is justified or not know we do.
Also maybe the publicity of this will serve to make parents mroe aware of the dangers to their children

 

[Lush]

Going off at a tangent here, there are instances of babies being smothered by cats. http://www.childalert.co.uk/absolutenm/templates/newstemplate.asp?articleid=62&zoneid=1 Yet how many young families with cats NEVER leave the baby sleeping in another room with the door open?

There are little kids who have drowned in a few inches of water left in a paddling pool. How many parents wish they'd emptied the pool straightaway rather than going indoors and leaving it until later. What are the chances? Are they bad parents too?

 

[keaton]

Going off at a tangent here, there are instances of babies being smothered by cats. http://www.childalert.co.uk/absolutenm/templates/newstemplate.asp?articleid=62&zoneid=1 Yet how many young families with cats NEVER leave the baby sleeping in another room with the door open?

There are little kids who have drowned in a few inches of water left in a paddling pool. How many parents wish they'd emptied the pool straightaway rather than going indoors and leaving it until later. What are the chances? Are they bad parents too?

Obviously you can't protect your children at all times. However from what i've read the apartment the children were left in does not appear very safe

 

[London Calling]

What the law says

There is no law that states the minimum age that a child can be left alone. However, it is an offence to leave a child alone when doing so puts him or her at risk.

How do you decide if you can safely leave a child alone?

There are many important things to consider before you decide to leave a child alone. These include:

the age of the child
the child's level of maturity and understanding
the place where child will be left
how long the child will be left alone, and how often
whether or not there are any other children in the household.

I disagree, there are literally hundreds of cases, where children have been neglected, and parents proved to have taken an irresponsible approach. i.e having beers in the pub. The parents have been imprisoned, children put under care of Social Services.

Legally a child sitter has to be over 16 to have legal responsibility for a child

 

[Questions]

I disagree, there are literally hundreds of cases, where children have been neglected, and parents proved to have taken an irresponsible approach. i.e having beers in the pub. The parents have been imprisoned, children put under care of Social Services.

Legally a child sitter has to be over 16 to have legal responsibility for a child

You can disagree all you want . That text is from a government site not my words

 

[DJ Leon]

Re: Re: Re: Re: Radio presenters saying the parents where irresponsible (Madeleine)

Absolutely. You try and do the very best for your children. I don't believe that leaving three children aged three and under alone in an apartment or anywhere for any length of time is a good parenting choice on any level.

Do you leave your children alone in their rooms?

If yes - if someone broke in and snatched them would you be happy about being called a bad parent?