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Personal question for those of you not stuck on the shelf...
- Thread starter The Large One
- Start date
Dick Knights Mumm
Take me Home Falmer Road
well ......... go on then ................
first day at work in the big smoke. Streaming cold, wanting to make a good impression. Spent the whole day streaming, coughing, sneezing and spluttering, mainly over the back of a gorgeous young woman who was to be my wife. I think my first words must have been ........
*wipes contents of nostrils from her shoulder*
sorry about that
first day at work in the big smoke. Streaming cold, wanting to make a good impression. Spent the whole day streaming, coughing, sneezing and spluttering, mainly over the back of a gorgeous young woman who was to be my wife. I think my first words must have been ........
*wipes contents of nostrils from her shoulder*
sorry about that
Lady Bracknell
Handbag at Dawn
About 25 years ago - while still engaged in a life of municipal slime - I joined other comrades at a union meeting in County Hall, Lewes.
During some lengthy discussions of the "running dog of the imperialist lackey" variety, I met the eye of a youthful Lord Bracknell across the table.
But almost immediately, a tea interval was called. During which we completely ignored each other. Something we kept up for the next 10 years.
Until the fateful day our paths crossed again......
During some lengthy discussions of the "running dog of the imperialist lackey" variety, I met the eye of a youthful Lord Bracknell across the table.
But almost immediately, a tea interval was called. During which we completely ignored each other. Something we kept up for the next 10 years.
Until the fateful day our paths crossed again......
The Large One
Who's Next?
- Thread starter
- #64
Lord B? This is great. Just like Mr & Mrs... 
Lord Bracknell
On fire
After years of trade union militancy, I was eventually bought off with the offer of a management position, which, among other things, gave me the responsibility of appointing staff.
We had a vacancy in my team for an enthusiastic, hard working and well organised team member (previous transport experience an advantage, but not essential) and, among the four candidates selected for interview, was Roz.
Before the interviews, all the candidates were given the opportunity to take a look at where they would be working if they were offered the job. This part of the process also allowed the rest of the team an opportunity to meet the candidates.
A colleague and I then gave each of the interviewees a thorough grilling for half an hour and we jointly reached the conclusion that Roz might be a bit feisty, but had great potential to work her way into the job.
I then returned to my team, to be told that they had all agreed that the mousy middle-aged woman from Uckfield, in the cardigan, was the one for them. 'Sorry', I said, 'But no'.
Much grief and disappointment from the team. But, under pain of dismissal for insubordination, they eventually accepted her as a valued colleague and friend.
But this isn't what you'd call a "relationship" is it?
The years passed ....
We had a vacancy in my team for an enthusiastic, hard working and well organised team member (previous transport experience an advantage, but not essential) and, among the four candidates selected for interview, was Roz.
Before the interviews, all the candidates were given the opportunity to take a look at where they would be working if they were offered the job. This part of the process also allowed the rest of the team an opportunity to meet the candidates.
A colleague and I then gave each of the interviewees a thorough grilling for half an hour and we jointly reached the conclusion that Roz might be a bit feisty, but had great potential to work her way into the job.
I then returned to my team, to be told that they had all agreed that the mousy middle-aged woman from Uckfield, in the cardigan, was the one for them. 'Sorry', I said, 'But no'.
Much grief and disappointment from the team. But, under pain of dismissal for insubordination, they eventually accepted her as a valued colleague and friend.
But this isn't what you'd call a "relationship" is it?
The years passed ....
The Large One
Who's Next?
- Thread starter
- #66
Yep, can we get to the chat-up, pulling the bird bit please?
Lady Bracknell
Handbag at Dawn
....some of which, in my case, were spent in pointless matrimony with "Kaptain Krap" a man devoted to his job shovelling waste water products at Southern Water. But not much else.
So, Dear Reader, I left him.
In our little local government world, however, big changes were afoot. The county council was to be RENT asunder and some of it sent to the City by The Sea.
And I was put IN CHARGE of making sure that 26% of all the traffic lights, bin lorries, buses, potholes and Hangleton Link roads arrived in ship-shape working order on the Glorious 1st April 1997 when the new city was born.
With my departure from his team, Lord Bracknell found himself able to share certain thoughts he'd previously considered "unsuitable" given our working relationship.
Although, not being entirely sure whether the receipt of these feelings might be followed by a swift kick in the bollocks, he played his cards very carefully. Aided by several pints of Harveys Best Bitter...
So, Dear Reader, I left him.
In our little local government world, however, big changes were afoot. The county council was to be RENT asunder and some of it sent to the City by The Sea.
And I was put IN CHARGE of making sure that 26% of all the traffic lights, bin lorries, buses, potholes and Hangleton Link roads arrived in ship-shape working order on the Glorious 1st April 1997 when the new city was born.
With my departure from his team, Lord Bracknell found himself able to share certain thoughts he'd previously considered "unsuitable" given our working relationship.
Although, not being entirely sure whether the receipt of these feelings might be followed by a swift kick in the bollocks, he played his cards very carefully. Aided by several pints of Harveys Best Bitter...
Ernest
Stupid IDIOT
Beach Hut said:
Yes you told her you were Ernest from NSC
Lord Bracknell
On fire
Meanwhile, in Lewes, a few days before Christmas ...
Walking, or maybe staggering, back from a very long team Christmas lunch (previous members invited), a discussion about Roz's new flat in the Cliffe High Street ensues.
'What's it like?' I ask. 'Would you like to see?' she says. Other team members make their excuses and leave.
Then, slowly, over the next few days, follows the "chat-up, pulling the bird bit" [© The Large One] - and the realisation that this woman has an appetite for tea like no-one I've ever met.
The rest is history.
Walking, or maybe staggering, back from a very long team Christmas lunch (previous members invited), a discussion about Roz's new flat in the Cliffe High Street ensues.
'What's it like?' I ask. 'Would you like to see?' she says. Other team members make their excuses and leave.
Then, slowly, over the next few days, follows the "chat-up, pulling the bird bit" [© The Large One] - and the realisation that this woman has an appetite for tea like no-one I've ever met.
The rest is history.
Last edited:
ben andrews' girlfriend
Nurse Laura
roz said:
coffee all over the screen!
NMH
Banned
Is your daddy around?
ok then, here's a sweety, would you like to meet my puppy?
ok then, here's a sweety, would you like to meet my puppy?
Dick Knights Mumm
Take me Home Falmer Road
*sniff*
NMH
Banned
roz said:
Ah, but some blokes would gladly have exchanged such a nastyness with their long slow and painfully expensive fates!
:thud:Terrace Dandy
Banned
- Mar 19, 2004
- 689
The Large One said:
I know what the womens are? What car you got? have you got a flat? how much money do you earn?
Shizuoka Dolphin
NSC M0DERATOR
The latest sent me a secret note between lessons... I've not as yet replied or anything yet... But I probably willl, and she'll probably be a long term BIRD.
PS: She's well over 16.
PS: She's well over 16.
dougdeep
New member
I met my one true love at a party in Woodingdean. Don't tell the wife though will you.
somerset
New member
Tirola Bar in Worthing,..... she had a motor, me and my brother needed a lift back to Lancing....... bobs your mothers brother, 3 years living together, 18 years married, a 16 y/0 daughter and a 14 y/o son......... there you have it.
Beach Hut
Brighton Bhuna Boy
Ernest said:Yes you told her you were Ernest from NSC
Thankfully I didn't as I am certain the relationship would have been short lived.
cheeseroll
New member
I sent over a drink but was to busy too talk to her or maybe I didnt want to get into serious chat up mode. Did the same thing next time i saw and she cornered me the next week out of curiosity for buying her drinks but not wishing to talk to her.
She asked me for a dance (it was a slow one) and i embarassingly tented...
She asked me for a dance (it was a slow one) and i embarassingly tented...