Long Distance Relationships

[Da Man Clay]

clayton has MASSIVE hands

Thanks for the advice guys and girls. I feel alot better about it after reading some of the stuff on here.

 

[Goring Gull]

One other pointer which i fell down on a bit - She will meet alot of new people and you'll be hearing alot of lads names mentioned resist the temptation to question her too much becuase she'll take it as you don't trust her.

Some of that wa sprobably my own insercurity about it all especially as i was intrested in some girl back in Worthing at the same time who worked in the Vintners parrot and i used to knck about with in Rutherfords - So i probably thought my girlfriend in Bournemouth may have been up to something similar.

 

[Hatterlovesbrighton]

Yeah you can make it work. My girlfriend of 3 months went to Uni to do a PGCE. We broke up the night before she went, but then we got back together 6 weeks in and have never looked back and 2 years on we are about to buy a house together. We saw each other on average once a fortnight and then longer during the holidays but spoke for at least half an hour every night. In some ways it made it into a really strong relationship.

 

[Goring Gull]

Yeah you can make it work. My girlfriend of 3 months went to Uni to do a PGCE. We broke up the night before she went, but then we got back together 6 weeks in and have never looked back and 2 years on we are about to buy a house together. We saw each other on average once a fortnight and then longer during the holidays but spoke for at least half an hour every night. In some ways it made it into a really strong relationship.

Beware of the phonecalls sometimes than can become a cause of arguement - or in my case they did when i didn't have much to say each night.

 

[dwayne]

mine lives in New York

It's great, I hardly ever see her (so can't get wound up), and when I go over there I stay in her swanky Manhattan apartment.


...and she's FIT

 

[Hatterlovesbrighton]

mine lives in New York

It's great, I hardly ever see her (so can't get wound up), and when I go over there I stay in her swanky Manhattan apartment.


...and she's FIT

Is that not just like a regular holiday romance. Like shagging the same barmaid when you go to Menorca every year?

 

[Nobby's Betamax Video]

If the pair of you ain't got the commitment, then it will fail.

Had a few in the past, worst was g/friend going to uni & me staying in Brighton. SHE wanted to demonstrate commitment by getting engaged (begrudgingly agreed). Visited her regularly for a couple of months then, as she got used to uni life & got rid of her homesickness, she started making excuses to stop me visiting.

Lo and behold, she moved out of digs, didn't return calls etc etc. Complete communication blackout. Not knowing whether she was even alive let alone still interested in me, I started going a bit mental.

Needless to say, she'd started seeing this bloke from uni (who I'd even met - if I saw him again I'd break his legs for lack of integrity & respect) and didn't have the balls to tell me for about a month. When she did (& this was the first I'd heard from her for that long) she phoned me at my work - an hour long tear-filled conversation later and it felt like she'd also robbed me of all credibility at work

BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!!

Still, Jerry Springer, since then I've avoided long distance relationships like the plague and have been happily married for a while now with kids and everything.

Medication still working, although my "Talk Show" halucinations keep coming and going

 

[Goring Gull]

One thing i'd also add and i might be completely wrong about . Normally someone who goes to uni tends to end up with someoneelse who went to uni - same educational-social level etc. Take a look at your mates at say 25 and how many of them who went to uni are with someone else who did and those who didn';t go to uni tend to be with someone else who didn't. Might just be observations but have a look.

 

[dwayne]

Is that not just like a regular holiday romance. Like shagging the same barmaid when you go to Menorca every year?

yer I suppose

I've been over there quite a bit recently though.

 

[Nobby's Betamax Video]

One thing i'd also add and i might be completely wrong about . Normally someone who goes to uni tends to end up with someoneelse who went to uni - same educational-social level etc. Take a look at your mates at say 25 and how many of them who went to uni are with someone else who did and those who didn';t go to uni tend to be with someone else who didn't. Might just be observations but have a look.

Funnily enough Goring, 2 years after my rant inducing experience, I buggered off to uni also. Now married to a graduate, as are most of my uni mates. So, in general, don't think you're too far off the mark.

 

[British Bulldog]

I've been trying to convince Mrs Bulldog that long distance relationships are the way forward but she ain't having none of it!

 

[Goring Gull]

Funnily enough Goring, 2 years after my rant inducing experience, I buggered off to uni also. Now married to a graduate, as are most of my uni mates. So, in general, don't think you're too far off the mark.

Exactly people don't think vbecause they have been to uni they are any better than someone who hasn't but you tend to move in slightly different circles have same ambitions aspirations etc within Work/Life e.g Chavs go for Chavs hence the growth of the sink estate.

You also get the young girl from the well to do family that goes out with a right scummer but you can bet your bottom dollar she won't end up with him.

 

[Da Man Clay]

If the pair of you ain't got the commitment, then it will fail.

Had a few in the past, worst was g/friend going to uni & me staying in Brighton. SHE wanted to demonstrate commitment by getting engaged (begrudgingly agreed). Visited her regularly for a couple of months then, as she got used to uni life & got rid of her homesickness, she started making excuses to stop me visiting.

Lo and behold, she moved out of digs, didn't return calls etc etc. Complete communication blackout. Not knowing whether she was even alive let alone still interested in me, I started going a bit mental.

Needless to say, she'd started seeing this bloke from uni (who I'd even met - if I saw him again I'd break his legs for lack of integrity & respect) and didn't have the balls to tell me for about a month. When she did (& this was the first I'd heard from her for that long) she phoned me at my work - an hour long tear-filled conversation later and it felt like she'd also robbed me of all credibility at work

BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!! BITCH!!

Thats what im worried about, though I am fairly close mates with another girl who lives with her so hopefully I wont have to deal with not knowing whats happening one way or the other. We are both really commited to each other though so hopefully it will work out.

 

[Goring Gull]

Thats what im worried about, though I am fairly close mates with another girl who lives with her so hopefully I wont have to deal with not knowing whats happening one way or the other. We are both really commited to each other though so hopefully it will work out.

Money on it you end up with the girl she's living with.

£10 come back to me in a year.

That'll last a while then you'll be with someone completely different when your 25. Seems harsh to think about but enjoy it all while it lasts.

 

[Da Man Clay]

Money on it you end up with the girl she's living with.

£10 come back to me in a year.

That'll last a while then you'll be with someone completely different when you25. Seems harsh to thiunk about but enjoy it all while it lasts.

Nah, Shes with one of my best mates so not alot of chance with that one.

I do agree with the last bit though.

 

[Goring Gull]

It's difficult if your committed to someone but you have to try and think it might happen but without letting it affect the relationship - I didn't work out for me - but everyones different. I think it would be stupid just to jack in what you've got though because it might not work.

 

[NMH]

If the pair of you ain't got the commitment, then it will fail.

Had a few in the past, worst was g/friend going to uni & me staying in Brighton. SHE wanted to demonstrate commitment by getting engaged (begrudgingly agreed).

That grudging commitment is called 'compromising yourself', and in that very important step in a relationship, neither partner should do it begrudgingly or else there will be a backlash.

When she's far away and meeting new people in a new town, she's subject to being swayed by girls who share their 'exciting sexual trists', and even try and talk her into shagging other blokes. Then, of course, there will be the occasional casanova who is brimming with confidence, charisma and is the 'bastard' who shags loads of slutty birds and the word gets around - and then he's a challenge for your average thick slapper.
Those are pitfalls, but if you are light about things and don't give out distrust to her, then you stand the better chance.

As far as I can see, it's okay for blokes to shag around in an OPEN long distance relationship because we don't get attached just because we did the horizontal samba. Women always give something up, when they shag, so if you sense that she's becoming distant, you had better start distancing yourself pronto.

 

[Nobby's Betamax Video]

Spotus Onus Goring

Damanclay - after my experience, I had two revelations that appear blindingly obvious but when you're " in luurve / lust" can become hidden:-

1) - If you're a "settle down with 1 girl" man - then other than whoever becomes your "life-partner", your mates come first.

2) - If you end up getting kicked in the nuts, don't do your head in trying to analyse it. I rely on "things happen for a reason", even if it's a crock of shite. Helps you move on.

Sounds like I'm putting a dampener on it, but it was the best thing she could have done. Gave me a kick up the backside, went to uni, met loads of top people, had loads of excellent times and met my wife, had kids etc etc.

You go for it & all the best mate

 

[Nobby's Betamax Video]

Women always give something up, when they shag, so if you sense that she's becoming distant, you had better start distancing yourself pronto.

Got it in one - the thing about it was the complete blackout. Have the spine to tell me rather than putting me through the wringer.

Still, you live and learn.

 

[Da Man Clay]

Spotus Onus Goring

Damanclay - after my experience, I had two revelations that appear blindingly obvious but when you're " in luurve / lust" can become hidden:-

1) - If you're a "settle down with 1 girl" man - then other than whoever becomes your "life-partner", your mates come first.

2) - If you end up getting kicked in the nuts, don't do your head in trying to analyse it. I rely on "things happen for a reason", even if it's a crock of shite. Helps you move on.

Sounds like I'm putting a dampener on it, but it was the best thing she could have done. Gave me a kick up the backside, went to uni, met loads of top people, had loads of excellent times and met my wife, had kids etc etc.

You go for it & all the best mate

Thanks mate.