[NSC] In my life so far I still HAVEN’T done this….

[KZNSeagull]

Shagged Kylie

I was going to say snogged Kylie but this works too.

 

[Eric the meek]

I had a mate in the Navy who would do the , er, squatting for an old queen in London for 50 quid a time. A lot of money in the early 80s.

He was never touched in any other way.

He was overpaid.

Noddy Holder once told the story how he 'performed' for £20 for a German watching underneath the glass table.

Germans eh?

 

[lawros left foot]

He was overpaid.

Noddy Holder once told the story how he 'performed' for £20 for a German watching underneath the glass table.

Germans eh?

Would have been the ‘English surcharge’ I imagine.

 

[Paulie Gualtieri]

Thrown a shoe over a pub

 

[Steve Foster]

Never voted Tory or bought the Sun.

Never voted Labour or bought The Mirror

 

[Blue Valkyrie]

Never voted Tory or bought the Sun.

Never voted Labour or bought The Mirror

Done all 4 !

 

[DavePage]

Been to the Amex, should be rectified next year

 

[Swansman]

Never been to that plucky island of yours and not to the big dumb one across the Atlantic either.

Never held a full-time "real job" where you are expected to show up in the morning and go home eight hours later.

Never killed a human, eaten human flesh, petted a seal or hit a dwarf, despite all of those things being on my bucket list.

Never met a dog named Fido.

Never had one of those yuppie "smartphone" things.

Never been skiing.

Thats what I can think of right now.. there might be a few more.

 

[Barham's tash]

Won an argument with the wife...

Or had an actual apology including the word sorry, or if it did that was then followed with a but…

 

[Deportivo Seagull]

Or Savlon.

Septic tank = Yank
Savlon = anti-septic

Courtesy of Stephen Fry from an old episode of QI

CSY - Cock Sucking Yank.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[Deportivo Seagull]

I had a mate in the Navy who would do the , er, squatting for an old queen in London for 50 quid a time. A lot of money in the early 80s.

He was never touched in any other way.

[emoji23]


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[TheJasperCo]

At the tender age of nearly 30, I've never broken a bone, bought a lottery ticket or scratchard, nor had an Albion season ticket.

 

[Wrong-Direction]

Eaten lobster I’m quite scared of shellfish as read it can kill you, I tried a prawn found it a bit tasteless.

Took the misses out for lobster last year, ****ing rank.

Sent from my SM-A326B using Tapatalk

 

[Taybha]

Driven a automatic car.

Tasted rice pudding

Dated a Greek Waiter

 

[lawros left foot]

Took the misses out for lobster last year, ****ing rank.

Sent from my SM-A326B using Tapatalk

At least you never gave her crabs.














I hope

 

[Baldseagull]

Still don’t know a single song by Ed Sheran, One Direction or Little Mix who I believe are the biggest artists of last few years.

Also, never watched or read any Shakespeare (except for the forced consumption at school and pressganged into Sydney Opera House). I positively hate Shakespeare. For England’s greatest playwright and inventor of half our language seemingly, it ain’t ‘Alf boring. So boring…

The language can make it a bit harder to enjoy, but underneath that are cracking tales.

 

[drew]

Never been to that plucky island of yours and not to the big dumb one across the Atlantic either.

Never held a full-time "real job" where you are expected to show up in the morning and go home eight hours later.

Never killed a human, eaten human flesh, petted a seal or hit a dwarf, despite all of those things being on my bucket list.

Never met a dog named Fido.

Never had one of those yuppie "smartphone" things.

Never been skiing.

Thats what I can think of right now.. there might be a few more.

Judging from previous posts you've also never discarded an empty pizza box!!

 

[Blackadder]

I have never done a bungee jump. And never fecking will either. Also, I’ve never set foot in any central or South American country. This I intend to rectify when travel restrictions are a thing of the past.

Same here. I would have been to Argentina and Colombia if it wasn't for the pandemic.

I have never been in a hot air balloon, flown in a helicopter or visited Burnley.

 

[BN9 BHA]

I have never bet on a football match.
Never paid to watch horse racing, I say never paid as I’ve watched a horse race when working in a house next to Plumpton racetrack.
Never grown a beard.

I have also never seen a football match at Stamford Bridge, I’ve been in the stadium 3 times though.

 

[Seagull58]

Never watched any Star Wars or Harry Potter movies. With a new big 4K TV with surround sound I'm tempted to watch a Star Wars film for the effects though.
Also on my bucket list is doing what these TV guys do and go on a 'tour' visiting places and eating only the best and staying in 5* hotels. When I'm rich that is, which is never.

You may find the Star Trek films better for getting the full surroundsound experience.