Great scientific breakthroughs we are still waiting for

[Rangdo]

The 4 pint milk bottle with a spout so that it doesn't spill milk all over the worktop when all I want is a splash of milk for my cup of tea.

 

[Tom Hark Preston Park]

The art to making a smooth Cup-a-Soup is to put the contents of the sachet in the cup, then about third fill it with water. Use your spoon to mix vigorously until you have made a paste, then slowly pour the water in a bit at a time, stirring as you go, and thus making a Cup-a-Soup to the perfect consistency. This also has the benefit when using a large mug of enabling you to stop pouring when you have reached optimum soup consistency, thus avoiding the social faux pas of making a disappointingly thin Cup-a-Soup.

Is this the most useful first post by a newbie ever?

Yes. Yes it is. Welcome bigbadbonkingbob

 

[Pevenseagull]

subliminal messages on Jack Johnson LPs that make people that regularly listen to that crap do the decent thing and top themselves

 

[Herne Hill Seagull]

A place to place 'beaming' device like in Star Trek. Just get in it like a phone box, dial where you're going and pop up instantly at the other end. An immediate end to pollution (from traffic and planes), no congestion, longer in bed and you'd get the half of your life back which you lost to commuting.

It's starting to piss me off that our so-called scientists can't come up with something so obviously useful. Lazy bastards.

 

[British Bulldog]

A pill that sober's you up, eliminates all traces of Alcohol & kills a hangover in minute's.

No more drink driver's and no more expensive taxi rides home from the pub.

 

[Trufflehound]

An invisiblity suit and mask - for use in the Girls Aloud dressing room.

A pair of disembodied feet jumping excitedly up and down might still give you away though...

 

[Barrel of Fun]

A pair of disembodied feet jumping excitedly up and down might still give you away though...

Damn! Back to the drawing board.

 

[tedebear]

Damn! Back to the drawing board.

and what happens when you sneeze - best cover that angle too!

 

[Trufflehound]

and what happens when you sneeze - best cover that angle too!

Sneeze?

 

[tedebear]

Sneeze?

Air escaping you nostrils at 60pmh with a rather loud whoosing and booming noise? If you're invisible - it might sort of alert someone that you're in the room?

or is it simply you don't know what a sneeze is?

 

[Barrel of Fun]

I think the heavy breathing might be a problem.

 

[tedebear]

I think the heavy breathing might be a problem.

So BoF - we have ascertained your scientific breakthrough should be an invisible diving suit with sound proofing?

 

[Trufflehound]

Air escaping you nostrils at 60pmh with a rather loud whoosing and booming noise? If you're invisible - it might sort of alert someone that you're in the room?

or is it simply you don't know what a sneeze is?

It's just that the last time I read about an invisible man perving in the Girls Aloud dressing room, what came out at 60 mph and gave the game away wasn't described as a "sneeze"...

 

[Man of Harveys]

It's just that the last time I read about an invisible man perving in the Girls Aloud dressing room, what came out at 60 mph and gave the game away wasn't described as a "sneeze"...

I too tried the old "it was a sneeze!" excuse after watching the women's volleyball on Eurosport but it wasn't washing...

 

[tedebear]

It's just that the last time I read about an invisible man perving in the Girls Aloud dressing room, what came out at 60 mph and gave the game away wasn't described as a "sneeze"...

Jeez don't burst BoF's balloon - you mean someones already invented an invisible suit? (with on board kleenex)

 

[MikeySmall]

Cure for diabetes.

Ill second that

 

[Curious Orange]

An inflatable, yet lifelike, replica of myself to sit at my desk and appear to be working as much as me, in order that I can bugger off home and have a nap!

 

[Le Premier Cru]

Air escaping you nostrils at 60pmh with a rather loud whoosing and booming noise? If you're invisible - it might sort of alert someone that you're in the room?

or is it simply you don't know what a sneeze is?

I thought you were usng it as a euphemism.

 

[Grendel]

So true

Where do you think they should be out of interest?

I don't know...tucked up inside out of harms way. Something like that.

 

[British Bulldog]

I don't know...tucked up inside out of harms way. Something like that.

Retractable Testicles! Store safely when not using.