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"he wasnt built for speed............he was built for comfort!" I'll bare that in mind, Race. Whoops, I mean bear....

and there's: :censored: Two Essex blondes walk into a department store, walk up to the perfume counter and pick up a sample bottle. Sharon sprays it on her wrist and smells it. "That's quite nice innit, don't you fink Trace" "Yeah what's it called?" "Viens a moi" "VIENS A MOI, what the...

SANDWICH[COLOR=deeppink]

Or there's this one: A blonde and a brunette are walking down the street and pass a flower shop where the brunette sees her boyfriend buying flowers. The brunette sighs and says, "Oh, crap, my boyfriend is buying me flowers again...for no reason." The blonde looks quizzically at her and says...

1. The b@st@rd who cut me up on the way home tonight 2. The c**t who pulled out in front of me this morning 3. The f**ker who didn't let me out into the main road yesterday I'm a really placid driver - honest guv ! :ohmy:

A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, "Before you tell that joke, you should know something. "Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I'm a 6' tall, 200 lb. black belt. The guy sitting next to me is...

YEAST :blush:

Cost of petrol has rocketted to around 23p a litre here (in Malaysia) and everyone is complaining ! :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Only 11/16 for me and I live in a land full of lady boys. I should do better ! :blush: :lolol:

well I left school around 16 years old with one O level and got a job. Worked hard and didn't become a 60's hippy student layabout and now have a damn good life style. Those were the days when there was a massive shortage of middle management as so many of that generation were snuffed out in...

I know her. And she does. She's a great shag :thumbsup:

Lightning being very loosly applied as a term of endearment on Sir Guy. GB whacked in the equaliser at Elland Road last season. Ken Bates was making his debut in the Director's box. Can the buttocks man do it again tomorrow??? :goal:

Do people actually pay those kind of rates? It's 'almost' free out in S E Asia. And the birds are a lot nicer by far... :censored:

i gave up my 20 - 30 a day after smoking for about 15 years. It's been 25 years 8 months 3 days and 2 1/2 hours since I had a fag (UK meaning, not USofA) - but who's counting? Oh yes I am that old ! :lolol:

just got set up with broadband at home. We are a little behind in this third world country. Trying to make up for lost posting time.

My missus said "footie". I think I agree with that. Any woman who comes between a bloke and his footie is just not worth keeping. In the long run supportingthe Albion will be a lot healthier on your bank balance. :cool:

can't understand why anyone with a smidge of intelligence would smoke these days but I reckon all that sucking in could make you fart more. Do smoker's farts smell different to non-smokers farts? :nono:

wish i could be there. should be a great turn out. we NEED Falmer. go demand it :cheers: :drink:

Ronnie Moore's already talking about the possibility of Rotherham going down with a new record low number of points. They're doomed. [/B] So it's Rotherham going down with Cardiff, then. Interesting.:clap: :laugh:

I think so. Don't want any time wasters (and there are many on NSC!) A lot of people coming a long way for this match and it's one way to guarantee seats at Palookaville.