[Misc] Your Best Ever Misunderstandings.....

[5Ways Gull]

An online groceries fck up springs to mind, I/we didn’t realise that each banana ordered at ASDA really meant a large bunch. So after ordering 20 banana, crates of the stuff arrived at the front door.

Our first ever online shop, Iceland i think, my wife did the order to arrive on a Friday afternoon. It was a blazing hot day and I had had a very stressful day at work. I arrived home and my wife informed me that she had messed up the shopping. Basically she had ordered a significant number of bottles of beer, not realising she was actually ordering 6 packs! We has a fridge full of a good lager that was on offer.

Sometimes misunderstandings are good

 

[alanfp]

Sorry I’m a bit lost to see the misunderstanding in this one
Wife asks you to donate her old clothes which you do and then a week later says she needs them as her cousin wants to borrow them. What am I missing?

Sorry - her "summer clothes" were merely out of the way during the winter months to save space in her wardrobe and would have come back into use a few months later. You're right, I didn't explain it well.

 

[aftershavedave]

I went to visit a friend many years ago. Knocked on the door, lady answers. He's not back just yet, but do come in and have a cup of tea. We had tea, and after 30 mins a complete stranger walks in, same name, different fella. My friend lived next door.....

 

[BN9 BHA]

Thread 'Baleba's second yellow'
https://nortr3nixy.nimpr.uk/threads/balebas-second-yellow.410731/

 

[South Stand Bonfire]

Interailing in 1986, six of us ( including Manu @Bodian ) were looking for accommodation in Interlaken. It was mine and one of the girl’s in our group turn to go and search for B&Bs. My German/Italian wasn’t up to much but I knew a bit of French to understand something about rooms for sale. I walked up the outside steps and knocked on this big wooden door to an imposing mansion. This relatively attractive lady answered the door in her dressing gown and it was soon apparent she was selling something but not what we were expecting!

 

[Bodian]

Interailing in 1986, six of us ( including Manu @Bodian ) were looking for accommodation in Interlaken. It was mine and one of the girl’s in our group turn to go and search for B&Bs. My German/Italian wasn’t up to much but I knew a bit of French to understand something about rooms for sale. I walked up the outside steps and knocked on this big wooden door to an imposing mansion. This relatively attractive lady answered the door in her dressing gown and it was soon apparent she was selling something but not what we were expecting!

Very good. On our Lake District field trip, you may remember we went to Carlisle to do a survey of the Central Business District (CBD). We had a questionnaire all about where people were coming to the city from, and why. Dibden (S) asked one woman what she was there to buy, to which she replied 'I'm not buying, love'. He didn't know which box to tick!

 

[South Stand Bonfire]

Very good. On our Lake District field trip, you may remember we went to Carlisle to do a survey of the Central Business District (CBD). We had a questionnaire all about where people were coming to the city from, and why. Dibden (S) asked one woman what she was there to buy, to which she replied 'I'm not buying, love'. He didn't know which box to tick!

I remember it well!

 

[Kubes]

Many years ago our two year old daughter was seated in her high chair awaiting her dinner. I placed said repast before her and turned away. "Where's my fucken spoon?" came the indignant cry. I spun round and cried "What!!??". Two innocent eyes looked up and she patiently repeated the question. "Where's my fork and spoon?"

 

[Ooh it’s a corner]

My eldest son is autistic. At age 6 he was kicking a football around in the playground after school where his mum worked. He accidentally kicked the ball onto a low roof and went to ask the caretaker if he could retrieve it for him. He was NOT trying to be ‘clever’

Son: can you get my ball back?
Caretaker: what’s the magic word?
Son: abracadabra

 

[Eric the meek]

My wife and I were on holiday in Stoke Fleming, just outside Dartmouth. We were in this pub, standing in a crowded bar. She appreciates a fondle in public now and again, just to tell her I'm still there and I love her.

So there I was, pint in right hand, her bottom in my left hand. Then I heard an exclamation, and I realised I was talking to my wife who was standing in front of me. I had been fondling this bloke's arse. He took it very well. I apologised profusely, and all was well.