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Worst Food Experience



Harry Wilson's tackle

Harry Wilson's Tackle
NSC Patron
Oct 8, 2003
56,215
Faversham
About 15 years ago I ent down to the Isle of Wight with my girlfriend of the time, to stay with a friend of hers. The lass cooked us chicken breast. It was undercooked. Undercooked chicken is sort of translucent, and cold. It was ****ing diabolical. Unfortunately I was urged by my gal to not say anything. We all knew, but nobody said. We continues eating, and as peter Cook might have said, the band played on. This says more about the English lower middle class, and demented women of a certain type than anything. Why I went along with it beats me. Must have been love.

Fortunately, no ill effects, other than something I'd describe as the opposite of wistfulness. Never been back to the isle of Wight. I cook my chicken well done these days. Very well done.
 




Fef

Rock God.
Feb 21, 2009
1,729
Contracted Ameobic Dysentry and Giardia together at the same ****ing time in Nepal. Dragged on and off for about 3 months. Not as bad as my girlfriend at the time who spent 3 days delerious in a country hospital in Jaisalmer. Funny story - we went on a overnight camel safari in the Thar desert, ate some food and camped in the desert. Next morning we wake up and my girlfriend says see's had a shitty night, go off to the dunes to crap and she's like a volcano - pretty surreal watching her shuffle and squirt as dung beetles zone in on her.
With no other choice we get on the camels for the 8 hour ride back to civilisation, after an hour she's fainting and falling off the camel. What do you do? tell the camel guys to go for help and leave us under a shrub with about 2 liters of water. Girlfriend is unconscious now, 4 hours later after giving up hope a jeep comes for us and takes us 2 hours to the nearest hospital. All the while in the jeep i've been wiping water on my girlfriends face with a blue scarf - and the dye has turned her blue. As I walk into the hospital carrying her limp body in my arms with a blue face the doctors think she's dead or dying and tell me to go away as it would be bad for them for a tourist to die at their hospital. How we all laughed when I convinced them it was only the dye (not). After a day she started to come round but still had terrible shits so every 30mins or so I had to help her to the toilet and hold her up over the squat. A large rat was living in that toilet and would run out of the bowl and between our legs every time sending my girlfriend into hysterics. Horrific 3 days but you learn a lot about yourself at times like these.

I bet you didn't manage to get all that on the back of a picture postcard sent back home!
 


vegster

Sanity Clause
May 5, 2008
28,273
Although I concur with all you say, the point has whizzed over yer 'ead. If push came to shove, my beef would be on the rare side. However from blue through to well done is absolutely acceptable as long as it was cooked that day. What is 'orrible is that GREY slice, of whatever it calls itself, that was prepared in 1943 and vacuumed packed ready to be served up as a great pub roast in 2013

But it seems to me that there is so much more fuss made over Beef compared to other roasts, Pork can be a bit chewy sometimes plus Lamb can be melt in the mouth or be a little gristly. even chicken if not done can be a bit rubbery but a bit of Beef overcooked hardly makes a difference I find. It's just the extraordinary fuss that gets me... P.s. My post above is factually accurate although it may not happen EVERY Sunday, thank the Lord !
 


lawros left foot

Glory hunting since 1969
NSC Patron
Jun 11, 2011
14,089
Worthing
A few years ago, Burger King had an advert on the tele for a huge great bacon burger type thing with all the trimmings that looked bloomin lovely, and there not being a Burger King franchise in Worthing, I was in London, and made a special effort to go into said restaurant, to try this veritable feast. I have never been so disappointed in my life, a flat overcooked bun, with limp lettuce and two bits of leather, pretending to be meat, i have never been into another burger joint, of any description, as i fear that, i wouldnt be able to cope with having my expectations shattered again. I also had a chicken curry in Mumbai, in a dark restuarent, that turned out to be nearly raw meat, i had eaten half of it, and i was expecting to live in the toilet for the next few days. But nothing happened, i reckon i dodged a bullet there
 


Brownstuff

Well-known member
Feb 21, 2009
1,528
Hove
Spent 3 days on a toilet after a dodgy Burger King in Holland. Very unpleasant. Thought the raw meat in the middle of the burger was how burgers are supposed to be Holland so happily demolished it late at night after a few beers. Never had a fast food burger since.

It seems this is the way they serve up burgers in Holland.
Similar experience long time back now but got a burger from one of those self-serve dispensers at a train station.
Had not seen this sort of thing before and will never ever use them again.
Was busy tucking in then realized after chomping through the majority that I was eating near enough raw meat.
Spat out the rest and awaited my death overnight.
Spent a horrendous night in the khazi coupled with the sweats.
Was actually ok the next day back on the joints and the saga was forgotten but will remain in my memory bank.
 




brakespear

Doctor Worm
Feb 24, 2009
12,326
Sleeping on the roof
Roast parsnips, Satans chips, vile, vile, vile, vile. And don't get me started on rhubarb.
Right :)
Olives, end of story. Disgusting little critters.
Wrong :)

For me, it would probably be one of the cheeses that my stepdad used to buy when we were in France. Cheese is usually my favourite of all foods but these were cheeses which were virtually liquid, with an ammonia content through the roof - just tasting a small amount made you want to sandpaper your tastebuds off.
 


Brownstuff

Well-known member
Feb 21, 2009
1,528
Hove
Getting delhi belly in India, spent a record 4 hours sitting on the loo cooling down unable to move after the whole of my insides shot out (there was nothing left to remove).
Stuck to Bombay Aloo for each meal after that and never touched meat again for the 3 weeks over there.

Also Chicken Korma down the cheapskates pub in George Street, Hove.
It was uncooked chicken in a random watery liquid.
Took one mouthful and walked out of the drum, didn't even tell them it was awful as the sight of it was blatant to see, they just won't get my food business again.
To serve up such a mess in the first place was disgraceful.
 






Many years ago had sausage and chips at at a local pub and then drove down to the Goldstone for an evening game.

On the way home came over all queer (copyright Ernest) and had to make a rapid stop on the A26 just before the Southerham roundabout to discharge. Had a couple of more stops before home and spend the night sitting in the thoughtfully designed shower room of my then house - wash basin and toilet were adjacent so I didn't have to move.
 




Adders1

Active member
Jan 14, 2013
369
The Sa Sa chip shop on Lewes Road, opposite B&Q about 15 years ago. Ordered some chips just after it had opened for the day, and the (then) manager decided she couldn't be arsed with turning the fryer on, so proceeded to scrape all of last nights crispy dog ends from the mesh, and microwaved them.
 




HHGull

BZ fan club
Dec 29, 2011
734
A curry house in Blackpool owned by an English couple who asked us to pay before we got it, enthralled we continued, the restaurant should have been called Uncle Benns.

Wasn't next to the Tudor Rose on the seafront was it?
 










Barrel of Fun

Abort, retry, fail
Not in the best hotel on the Island, wonderful fare, being half Spanish owned helped no doubt

Which one is that?

I got severe food poisoning from a plate of prawns in Cuba. That or a reaction to some street rum.


I had a poor tasting and incredibly chewy bit of meat in South America and even a starving dog turned it down. Maybe it was dog?
 
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maltaseagull

Well-known member
Feb 25, 2009
13,365
Zabbar- Malta
You appear to be getting some completely undeserved flak for that statement Superphil, so I shall offer my wholehearted support and agree with you on both counts.

Parsnips and rhubarb = devils food :sick:

I am only half bad- love roast parsnips but can take or leave rhubarb.
 










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