Whores.

[jakarta]

When I started working on the Oil Rigs out of Aberdeen in 1991 out of interest I drifted down to the Harbour one evening to look at the Offshore Support Vessels and was offered to dae the business by a rather unattractive Nicola Sturgeon lookalike. I declined.

Twenty years later I was about to finish my North Sea Tiger years & was accosted on Union Street by a very beautiful young lady who also wanted us to undertake a bit of business. Lithuanian. Perhaps I shouldn't have declined but I was married by then. Wonder what Brexit will do to that industry?

 

[Brighton Mackem]

In Shanghai after leaving a bar and getting in to a taxi, when two ladies offered me their services which I declined had a tug of war with me pulling on both arms. managed to wriggle free and make my escape.

 

[Southern Scouse]

I have one, but not sure you could really say they were whores.
Cup final day 1983, Saturday, a few can remember it. Three us us left EP station and made our wat up to London on the Friday after work. No idea where we were staying but whatever. We headed directly for the SoHo sex shops, we were all in our late teens and this was a first for most of us up to London. In the afternoon having sheepishly wandered all over we were finally bullied/hassled into a peep show by some geezer. After paying a tenner each if I remember correctly we made our way down a dark corridor to what was a circle of doors with curtains, we were the only ones inside. So each of us ended up in a cubicle, me with a large bag of chips purchased outside. Sat down and looked through a letterbox opening. There were three ladies all about 23/24 naked sat in the middle. They must have been told we had arrived somehow as they soon started gyrating in front of our boxes. After about five minutes a beautiful brunette appeared in front of my window and said with a Knightsbridge accent "oh gawd darling, you have food? Be a dear and pass some through the window, we are bloody starvinnnnng in here". Being a decent lad I passed the the chips.
Then the girls disappeared. As we left they all appeared outside and asked us if we wanted a drink we funnily enough we did. During the drink the brunette explained she was first cello at the Albert hall and did this to earn a little extra. As it happened no money was exchanged but it was and still is the best weekend (2-2) I ever had in London!

 

[Shropshire Seagull]

Cricket tour 1993 North Wales. Couple of young lads on the tour (about 17), neither of whom had had their way with a lady. We had pointed out a brothel to them when out drinking following a game.

They had a tenner between them, shyly disappeared from the rest of the team, and returned to the knocking shop. When the Madame found out how much money they had she was somewhat affronted, and all she was prepared to offer was a hand shandy to one of them. They were both desperate so couldn't decide who was going to be the lucky recipient of an efficient but disinterested Barclays, so she made them draw cards to determine the 'winner'.

North Wales cricket tour - you weren't staying at Sparrows in Denbigh per chance?

 

[NooBHA]

Yesterday, as I was just pulling away from a customers house in a quite respectable area of Plymouth, I heared a girl shouting, looking in my wing mirror I saw a girl running down the middle of the road.
She poked her head inside my van and said that she desperately needed cash and would I like some 'business', it took a few seconds for the penny to drop and I said no, ok then how about a 'blowie' for £20, no! I replied again, ok £10, final offer, I respectfully declined again and drove off.
Have you any whore stories?

LOL LOL LOL

I saw at [MENTION=4019]Triggaaar[/MENTION] s post after that. I'm not sure I believe it either but it was funny

I recall being in Amsterdam when I was very young . Well not that young about 24.

I met someone and spent the night there. In the morning she said ''What about my Gelders (Dutch currency back then for you youngsters)? '' I said ''f#ck off I was much better than you were'' She responded ''I came back here to your hotel - I want my taxi fare home'' - I gave her 10 Gelders - About 50 quid in todays money. Well it was a long time ago - To this day my friends in Holland still call me '' The Ten Gelder Whore''

I look back on it now and I often wonder - Was I really better than her or was I just kidding myself ?

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I was actually very close to Barcelona!

Don't you mean Barearsealona?

 

[dannyboy]

In India at a beach bar. Needed a piss so walk off to the cubicle pisser thing ... locked. So I walk to the back of the beach and start pissing in a bush. Now become aware that there is someone shuffling up behind me then this little indian man appears beside me while I'm mid piss. sounds better if you do the indian accent and imagine him shaking his head from side to side.

him: good evening sir
me: er hello (still pissing)
Him : Would sir like a chick?
me: no thanks I'm ok for a chick tonight thanks.
Him : oh ok sorry sir

He walks off but only a couple of yards and comes back
Him ; sorry to bother sir but if no want chick then how about DICK!
Me : No its ok thanks I don't really want any dick either thanks.
Him : oh ok sir sorry sir .

Same thing happens he walks off but comes straight back and I'm still pissing

Him :er sorry sir . If no want chick and no want dick how about chick with dick ?

I fell apart laughing at this point

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I've sent a pm.

You b'stard. I just laughed so hard I think I ruptured my spleen.

 

[LlcoolJ]

When I saw that El Pres had posted on this thread I was hoping for something much more filth based than "some young lads didn't actually get any". Disappointing. [emoji6]

If that's you're only/best hooker story EP then my hat's going on the barbecue.

I'm not putting any of my stories on here either mind, but I have seen plenty of "working girls" who I wouldn't accept any amount of money to touch, let alone anything more. And it makes you think about the blokes who are actually handing over money to them for the "privilege".

Grim.

Have met quite a few women (socially) who work, or have worked in the oldest profession though who are completely normal, not drug addicted, actually enjoyed the work and the money and are REALLY attractive.

In these cases I see absolutely no difference to the women who marry men for money. In fact the latter are much worse, as at least the hooker is being totally honest, whereas Trump's Mrs et al are living an extremely transparent lie.

Everyone can see that they are ****ing for cash but it's not called that. Who's the whore?

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

I (vaguely) remember a trip to Amsterdam where Window shopping was a very different experience. So many tastes catered for with some surprisingly fine looking displays.

Lightweight. Numrous members of this NSC spent a couple of days in Amsterdam some years ago and.....

I fell asleep in my calzone.

I'm saying nothing else about anything else.

 

[Insel affe]

During my stocktaking days I stopped to ask a lady the way to the County Hotel in Walsall which she told me but 30 secs later I was pulled over by a car that was West Midlands Vice. They asked what I was doing and I explained but one officer stayed with me while the other went off to speak to her. He came back and said it was ok as she confirmed my story but was apparently on the game and I wondered had she said that I had asked her what she was doing or anything such I would have been nicked. I must add this was late 70s pre sat nav days.

Don't believe a word of that, anyone in Walsall who knows anything about directions would have escaped.

 

[marlowe]

I don't think I've seen so many unlikely uses of the word "declined" used so often in the same thread by so many different posters.

 

[Triggaaar]

I look back on it now and I often wonder - Was I really better than her or was I just kidding myself ?

You paid to have sex with someone. Not sure you can class yourself as better than them.

 

[marlowe]

a likely story.....

Don't believe a word of that.......

I don't think it's all lies, I believe it up to this bit...

During my stocktaking days I stopped to ask a lady.....

 

[Albion my Albion]

Barcelona has gone to the dogs these days

Your mum!

 

[Tokyohands]

I got tipped by a Vietnamese hooker once. OK it was only 2000dong (7pence) but it's the principle!

 

[Albion my Albion]

Funnily enough I got offered sex near Brighton station middle of the afternoon last week,I don't think that has ever happened to me in Brighton,other cities in Europe it is obviously very common but I was quite shocked.

I apologize. I didn't realize it was you.

 

[Albion my Albion]

Nothing exciting.

Paid £20 for a private dance in an 'exotic' pub a few years ago but I felt ripped off. Offered to lick her clit for free and make her cum but she turned me down.

The thing is they can get someone to pay for that privilege. Men are such dogs. Women can get them to do almost anything for sex.

 

[Albion my Albion]

Cricket tour 1993 North Wales. Couple of young lads on the tour (about 17), neither of whom had had their way with a lady. We had pointed out a brothel to them when out drinking following a game.

They had a tenner between them, shyly disappeared from the rest of the team, and returned to the knocking shop. When the Madame found out how much money they had she was somewhat affronted, and all she was prepared to offer was a hand shandy to one of them. They were both desperate so couldn't decide who was going to be the lucky recipient of an efficient but disinterested Barclays, so she made them draw cards to determine the 'winner'.

I'd call that having a wheel loose.

 

[Bozza]

Lightweight. Numrous members of this NSC spent a couple of days in Amsterdam some years ago and.....

I fell asleep in my calzone.

I'm saying nothing else about anything else.

That's not true.

I'm pretty sure we managed to move the calzone just before impact, although that did mean you headbutted the table instead.