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What's so attractive about Burnley?



EDS

Banned
Nov 11, 2012
2,040
Briliant, just as we are trying to understand what motivates a player to sign for Burnley the whole thing is put properly into perspective by a Croydon dweller.

Burnley is delightful by comparison.

Yep, because everyone who plays for or supports Palace lives on a council estate high rise
 




Green Cross Code Man

Wunt be druv
Mar 30, 2006
20,748
Eastbourne
Once again palace trolls post on a thread that has absolutely nothing to do with them or their sorry little team of cheats.

Don't they understand Brighton fans were arguing amongst themselves very successfully already?
 




dejavuatbtn

Well-known member
Aug 4, 2010
7,574
Henfield
Reports I had back from Kurt at Burnley were that some of the fans were just out of their heads. If the team lost then none of the players dared go into town for fear of being beaten up. I heard that their manager was out in a restaurant with his missus after one defeat and some idiot set fire to her dress. Another occasion a player was beaten up with a bit of 2x2. Good luck Ashley.
 








Hamilton

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
12,953
Brighton
Well, for a start Leeds is a spit away, and if you haven't visited then you should. It's a cracking city. Equally, Manchester is very close.

Alternatively, you could be living in the countryside outside Burnley and have this as your view (which in my mind is as beautiful as the gorgeous Sussex countryside)

View attachment 50122
 


Tony Meolas Loan Spell

Slut Faced Whores
Jul 15, 2004
18,071
Vamanos Pest
Agreed, obviously you lot have more of a chance of reaching the premier league than us....

Dont be stupid. I say again at the time of FFS joining you had successfully staved off relegation for something like the second or third year in a row. You then "consolidated" with Murrays 8 goals where we finished 10th and you guys 17th?

Then you had that golden run under Dougie (lets face it that run got you into the play offs) your form under Ollie was sh1te and you limped into the play offs on the last day beating Peterboro something like your third win since January. Then of course its only 3 games from there.

To suggest there was "more chance" is clutching at straws.

It was all about money when FFS moved.
 




Creaky

Well-known member
Mar 26, 2013
3,862
Hookwood - Nr Horley
Schoolboy-level answer really: "you mocked me, boo-hoo> you love Ashley, you love Ashley!, ner ner ner ner ner!". Bravo.

It's not to do with Barnes. I was simply suggesting that the tedious branding of Burnley as some sort of grim, hopeless northern shithole in comparison to glorious, beautiful, vibrant flawless Brighton by some posters was lazy and unfair.

This - Burnley is in a beautiful part of the country.
 




L1882

New member
Jan 9, 2014
7
Reports I had back from Kurt at Burnley were that some of the fans were just out of their heads. If the team lost then none of the players dared go into town for fear of being beaten up. I heard that their manager was out in a restaurant with his missus after one defeat and some idiot set fire to her dress. Another occasion a player was beaten up with a bit of 2x2. Good luck Ashley.

Eh you can't beat Chinese whispers.

Players rarely go out in Burnley, it is a small town, there isn't a great deal to attract a young man with pockets full of cash and EVERYBODY recognises you and it must be an absolute nightmare. They do occasionally go out in town and largely, other than the endless attention, go un molested. Stan Ternent, our ex manager, tells a tale of a typical bouncer refusing entry to Ian Wright (yes, that one) whilst out celebrating promotion to Division 2 (old money, 1/Championship new money) because he was wearing trainers - bouncers, set of ....

On the 'wife on fire' bit - some truth in it but it wasn't after a single defeat, it was outside a chippy and there was an element of joke in it, nobody actually tried to set fire to her dress - though I can't say I found it amusing myself - and it disrespected arguably our most important manager since the 70's!

Not heard the 2x2 story but the player in question was most likely caught piping somebodies significant other.
 




Lady Whistledown

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
47,630
You can talk of wooden seats all day long...but Murray joined Palace because he wanted Prem football (and got it)

You are utterly out of your TREE if you seriously believe Murray joined you for that reason.

Granted, you somehow squeaked your way into the Premier League last season, but no way on earth was that ever apparent at the time his contract ran out with us and you offered him five or six grand a week more than we were prepared to. You were relegation candidates then and you still were even at the start of last season (by the admission of many of your own fans) until something strange happened.

I'm more than willing to accept it paid off for the bloke as you pulled it off, but no way on EARTH did Glenn Murray sign for Crystal Palace thinking he had a realistic chance of promotion.
 


Lady Whistledown

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
47,630
Eh you can't beat Chinese whispers.

Players rarely go out in Burnley, it is a small town, there isn't a great deal to attract a young man with pockets full of cash and EVERYBODY recognises you and it must be an absolute nightmare

You've got no worries on that front with Ashley Barnes. He's the absolute antithesis of your party boy footballer. Married very young, devoted father, kisses the tattoo of his son's handprint every time he scores. I doubt he goes out much at all, at least not without Mrs Barnes and young Flynn in tow. You'll see Pope Francis renouncing God to marry a butch, leather-clad Brazilian chap called Felipe before you see Ash staggering out of Vodka Revolutions at 3am.

Hence I think the area will probably suit him. He'll buy himself a nice house out in the Lancashire countryside and settle right in.
 


L1882

New member
Jan 9, 2014
7
Sounds like Barley/Roughlee will be perfect for him - that's where Holloway lived whilst managing Blackpool and it is a lovely place.

But Vodka Revolution? Way to classy for us - we have to make do with Walkabout!
 




SI 4 BHA

Active member
Nov 12, 2003
737
westdene, brighton
A bit out of date but according to a NHS report for 2009...

The health of people in Burnley is generally worse than the England average, including violent crime and incapacity benefit claimants for mental illness.
However, some indicators are similar to the England average, such as physically active adults and excess winter deaths.
There are inequalities by deprivation, gender and ethnicity. For example, men and women in the least deprived areas can expect to live several years longer
than men and women in the most deprived areas.
Over the last ten years there have been decreases in death rates from all causes. However, the rates remain above the England average and the gap between
Burnley and England death rates from all causes for women has widened over the decade.
The health of children and young people is generally worse than the England average, including breast feeding initiation and teenage pregnancy. GCSE
achievement is the fourth worst in England. However, the percentage of reception year children who are obese is similar to the national average.
Female life expectancy is the sixth worst in England.
The health of the people of Burnley is affected by high levels of poverty and worklessness with poor general levels of educational attainment in children.
The East Lancashire Annual Public Health Report provides further information on the health of this area and is available at www.eastlancspct.nhs.uk

Sounds great!
 




Footsoldier

Banned
May 26, 2013
2,904
Are you mad? It is not exactly a shit grim area. It has the Yorkshire Dales to the north and the Peak District to the south. It is surrounded by large swathes of beautiful countryside, more than we have here. Also, if you love a city there is Bradford, Leeds, Manchester, Preston and Blackpool all pretty close.

You do own a map? You do realise it is not located in some post apocalyptic nuclear war zone?

It's not that Plooks, I'd worry about my daughters.
 


The Merry Prankster

Pactum serva
Aug 19, 2006
5,578
Shoreham Beach
Whilst looking for somewhere to stay in Burnley i did the internet recommendation thing (Trip Advisor) etc.. The number one hotel in Burnley appears to be the Premier Inn. I've nothing against Premier Inn's……..
 






Lady Whistledown

Well-known member
NSC Patron
Jul 7, 2003
47,630
Whilst looking for somewhere to stay in Burnley i did the internet recommendation thing (Trip Advisor) etc.. The number one hotel in Burnley appears to be the Premier Inn. I've nothing against Premier Inn's……..

Presumably down to the fact that the town itself doesn't attract much of a tourist trade. The surrounding area may well do, for those wanting to explore the Dales and the Peak District, but those types will be staying in country inns & resorts & rented cottages.
 


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