[Misc] What questions have you asked which, once given the answer, wish you hadn't.

[pearl]

When I was 11 some of my class went on an exchange trip to a Catholic girls school in Belgium. It was very dull, but on the ferry back we met some cheeky boys from Manchester. They asked us various questions, one being 'Do you masterbate?' We just giggled, but made a note of the word to ask Sister Francis what it meant later. Sister Francis didn't actually explain, but we really wished we hadn't asked.

 

[The Sock of Poskett]

Ask David Cameron

 

[phoenix]

I went to the Warren Browne unit at Southlands (vd clinic)

I seen a girl i know and said hi, what are you doing here? What a pratt i felt !!

 

[lawros left foot]

Is it cancer?

 

[Super Steve Earle]

Q to girl at work on her birthday: 21 again?
A: No, I'm 19 today.

Skulked away and looked for hole in ground

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

When Julian Clary "joked" that he had just fisted the then chancellor Norman Lamont ....... I asked "what is fisting?". I still wish I'd never heard or asked it.

 

[southstandandy]

In 1996 I was with a group of mates at the Brighton Centre to see Radiohead.

Suddenly in the foyer we spotted Cameron Diaz and I thought 'holy shit - I need to say something to her'. I walked up behind her (a bit stalkerish!) and just as she was about to enter the main hall I jumped in and said 'it is Cameron isn't it?' She was really nice and confirmed my suspicions with her strong American accent, so I then asked her 'what was she doing here' and her reply was ' to see the concert'. I felt a complete tit as I suppose ask a stupid question.....get a stupid answer.

She was decent enough though to have a chat and said she was in the UK (which is what I was refering to) to promote her films 'A life less ordinary' and My best friend's wedding'. Whilst talking to her for a couple of minutes Michael Stipe from REM and Ewan McGregor walked past and dragged her into the crowd. Wish I had had a smart phone back then.

 

[Juan Albion]

Not me, but my wife... she was reading a Stephen King novel at work during her lunch break, and didn't know what one of the words meant. So she asked the bloke next to her what a "boner" was.

Brave man to come on here and admit his wife wasn't familiar with boners. Bravo.

 

[Fungus]

Brave man to come on here and admit his wife wasn't familiar with boners. Bravo.

If SK had said "huge hard-on", she would have got the message. "Boner" sounds rather scrawny.

 

[giveusfalmerplease]

when your girlfriend asks you "is it in yet?" its time to get a new GF

 

[pastafarian]

Question/statement i posed to a Maori bouncer many moons ago......"You cant punch me.....dont you know i am British?"
Needless to say he could ....expertly as it turned out......and didnt give a toss i was British.

 

[knocky1]

Friend’s daughter told she couldn’t eat a particular junk food.
“Why not?”
“Because you are what you eat”.
“You must eat a lot of dick then, Dad.”

 

[Questions]

How do Ostriches have sex?

At least if the female is ugly she can help by sticking her head in the sand.