Things you've had to endure for the other half.....

[El Presidente]

Never Forget, the Take That musical.

It was worse than you might imagine. At one point I was told by a bingo winged monstrosity in the row in front of us to 'Get up and dance and enjoy yourself'.

There were eleven men at the theatre that night in a full auditorium, eight of whom were gay, the others (I assume) were on a promise.

Add to that

1: Real Housewives of Cheshire
2: Say Yes to the Dress.

 

[Dick Swiveller]

Never Forget, the Take That musical.

It was worse than you might imagine. At one point I was told by a bingo winged monstrosity in the row in front of us to 'Get up and dance and enjoy yourself'.

There were eleven men at the theatre that night in a full auditorium, eight of whom were gay, the others (I assume) were on a promise.

Add to that

1: Real Housewives of Cheshire
2: Say Yes to the Dress.

I think I can probably better that - I only remember seeing 2 other men when I took my sister and her friend to see Jason Donovan at the Brighton Centre.

 

[Albion my Albion]

Rick Astley

My sincere condolences.

 

[Albion my Albion]

even if it was weird being one of about a dozen men among 2000 women

Those are just awful experiences, aren't they?

 

[Albion my Albion]

Cher in Vegas a couple of years ago.

However, i got pretty smashed before it, which helped. And as there were around 100 blokes in the crowd the non existent queue for the toilet was a highpoint

I couldn't give a crap if there was a long queue for the men's toilet.

 

[Albion my Albion]

It's curious that you evidently didn't need to google that to know what it meant*. Hmm.


*Unlike me, ofc. *nods*

What about pegging during a threesome if you know what I mean?

 

[Captain Sensible]

The E! Channel is on continually all day, I know way too much about the Kardashians.

 

[Gwylan]

Those are just awful experiences, aren't they?

At a rough guess, about 90% of them were lesbians. And, as I was with my then girlfriend, it wouldn't have made a difference if there were all newly single, hot and heterosexual

 

[Albion my Albion]

At a rough guess, about 90% of them were lesbians. And, as I was with my then girlfriend, it wouldn't have made a difference if there were all newly single, hot and heterosexual

With your gf or not it makes a big difference whether they are lesbians or hetero.

 

[Berty23]

Her family. They drive me up the wall. Their volume is three or four levels higher (on a five level scale) than everyone else.

She doesn't really like sport though and I am a sport monkey so the amount I watch I would suggest That on balance I win.

 

[symyjym]

Ha! I recently learnt what it meant. Not through personal experience I may add...

Is Pegging the that, that Meat Loaf was singing about?

I guess it's hard to find something that rhymes with pegging .

 

[Simster]

It does appear from this thread as if most women have absolutely shite taste in music.

I take her up to London with our daughter to see Olly Murs (see!), it snows and London grinds to a halt, so they end up staying in a hotel. This means I have to go the trouble of meeting her the following morning at East Croydon station - having walked 2 miles with our 3 month old son on my back in a carrier - just to collect our daughter from her so that she can then go out shopping with her mate.

Compare and contrast her woeful effort to when the boot is on the other foot - when my wife does want to do so something sensible like watching the Albion, I have always made that special effort. The first time I took her to Withdean, the sun was out and we won 6-0. The first and only time I have taken her to the Amex, the sun was out and we won 6-1. I lay on the sun AND the result. She lays on nothing but trouble.

 

[Goldstone1976]

The first time I took her to Withdean, the sun was out and we won 6-0. The first and only time I have taken her to the Amex, the sun was out and we won 6-1

...And you didn't think to take her along to the home game against Boro last season? indeed.

 

[Simster]

...And you didn't think to take her along to the home game against Boro last season? indeed.

The risk of a swap to see some God awful stadium "gig" seemed too high a price to pay AT THE TIME.

 

[Meade's Ball]

Subtitles. She's of the Spanish variety so anything we watched to begin with needed subtitles. Now, I am addicted to subtitles and struggle to watch much without them. I sometimes even beam with delight when noticing a film I want to see down the flicks is a showing for the hard of hearing. I'm in.

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

For Mrs Gwylan, nothing. She's a paragon among women

I'll clone that verdict, vis a vis Mrs Tackle, with flying buttresses and solid gold heralding trumpets.

In a previous life, Bryan Adams springs to mind. I made such a good job of not showing that I wanted to strangle myself with my own entrails, that she booked tickets to see him again a few months later. Those of you who know my tastes can imagine the seven levels of sulphurous pointy-sticked Hell I endured, just waiting for the dread day.

Later she wanted to see U2, a band I once admired (Jenkinsons 1980), but this was the Zooropey tour, with maximum bluster and crap songs, so I offered her a drive her up to Wembley with her mate, then I drove up to Edware and strolled around my old haunts, picking her up after she had finished waving her cigarette lighter and singing along, badly, to bad songs. Lesson learned.

Sam ex, the Slug and Lettice, Fulham Broadway. What a shambols. A collection of her most wanky friends, and an increadibly loud and crap singer, and crap food. I may have been a little rude to one or two people that evening

And way back when, with another one who bit my dust, endless shopping tours of Western Road, where countless impossible bit of kit were tried on, and nothing bought, as I slowly contemplated my own death . . . longingly.

Probably my worst nightmare was Christmas with a German ex, with her family. The dad is a depressive, and likes to sit quietly in a darkened room. Unfortunately this is the main living room. None of them drink, so various comments were made as I embarked on a lone quest for sedation, ideally ending with a coma. The brother is an extremely dangerous lad who, fortunately, liked me, but it was scant consolation. Dinner was goose, undercooked, and a tiny bit whiffy. Fortunately the lady dumped me a few weeks later. I did my best to feign disappointment, and I think I got away with it.

Oh, and someone I won't identify, many years ago, had me drive 200 miles to stay with her friends for the weekend. When we arrived in the small seaside town, I asked where exactly they lived. 'I don't know', she said. That relationship didn't end well.

Fortunately, I am these days a contended old *******, as noted above

 

[BBassic]

Boxing Day with her family.

Her die-hard Crystal Palace supporting family.

Every year.

 

[Titanic]

Boxing Day with her family.

Her die-hard Crystal Palace supporting family.

Every year.

We will fight for evermore...

 

[Simster]

Boxing Day with her family.

Her die-hard Crystal Palace supporting family.

Every year.

Do they dress in black and gimp masks and spend all day banging a drum?

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

Chicago Fire
Desperate Housewives
Teen Mom
Dance Moms
Geordie Shore
Ex on the Beach
Criminal Minds
Rizzoli and Isles

Michael Buble Christmas album as of November 20th each year.

My deepest condolences. I'd need a lot more than a regular soapy tit-**** to tolerate that lot without the aid of high dose opiates