Things you will NEVER hear at Falmer

[skipper734]

These sporks make eating this wholesome healthy food a lot easier.

 

[bhaexpress]

It's a shame we have made such a mess of an area of outstanding natural beauty.

 

[jordanseagull]

When is the steel being delivered??

 

[Jack Straw]

These sporks make eating this wholesome healthy food a lot easier.

Get those f****** sporks out of the way!

 

[Uncle Buck]

Blimey, the Taxman is sober.

 

[Everest]

We're shit, but we've got a home...

Maybe not.

 

[Gordon the Gopher]

Fancy a pint round the Swan after the final whistle goes!

 

[seagullwedgee]

NEVER heard at Falmer...........

"Shit ground, shit fans"

 

[Lokki 7]

Well you know technically this would never have happened without Archer and Bellotti selling the Goldstone so lets give them a big cheer, HIP HIP...!

 

[xenophon]

"I think if we get a 0-0 draw at the Bernabeu we can beat them back here and get Man Ure in the semis"

 

[Spun Cuppa]

I think 4-0 was a fair result...

 

[upthealbion1970]

i wish i could have the wind and rain in my face again

 

[liverpool_one]

i see ernest has finaly stopped moaning.

 

[pasty]

Good call. Maybe we need some sort of staple, fallback song along the Millwall 'No one likes us' lines.

If anyone came up with a catchy number that involved bats, duck ponds and Falmer NIMBYS, I'd sing it.

Oh the lads, you should've seen us coming
Pissing in your pond now that we're off and running
Killing all your ducks and bats
And getting off our faces
Charging down the Falmer Rooooaaad
To beat the Nimby's senseless

 

[Notters]

Oh the lads, you should've seen us coming
Pissing in your pond now that we're off and running
Killing all your ducks and bats
And getting off our faces
Charging down the Village Way
To beat the Nimby's senseless

 

[Dave the OAP]

Fancy a bacon sarnie Tony?

 

[The Large One]

Didn't think you'd be here, Dick.

 

[Spun Cuppa]

Steward: 'Welcome to Falmer Mr. Wideguy. Thank you so much for buying a season ticket. Your seat is five along in Row Z. Enjoy the game...'

 

[Driver8]

Get your ponchos here only £2.

 

[Tooting Gull]

'The Portakabin is this way, Mr Abramovich.'