[Travel] The worst hotel you've ever stayed in

[Easy 10]

Once stayed in a hotel in Manchester for work and had to ask reception to remove a traffic cone from the bedroom.

Not ideal. But would that not have been possible to carry out yourself ?

 

[jackalbion]

Also, two B and Bs I stayd in on a road trip in 84. One in Swansea (yes, I know) and another in north Devon somewhere. Both run by grannies who should really have already been dead. The rooms seemed like nobody had set foot in them since the coronation (of George V). As soon as we sat on the beds, clouds of dust that smelt of the 1950s arose, I think it was dust. Could have been the ashes of the long dead. Every crevice was inhabited by spider ghosts. The bed springs were the only things in the place with vigour - leaving a bleedng rusty gouge in my flank by morning. In Swansea the local pub hushed when I had the temerity to enter the public bar with A Woman. **** you, Wales. **** you shit B and Bs and 'hotels'. Burn dem in fiyah.

�� “should both have already been dead”

 

[clapham_gull]

Not ideal. But would that not have been possible to carry out yourself ?

I was only young to be honest and it my first job.

In my defence it wasn't a case of "what would Elvis Presley do ?" but more I'd better ring reception because traffic cones don't belong in bedrooms.

Oddly the room had been cleaned as well.

Looking back it was obviously a security services recruitment test which I failed miserably.

 

[The Wookiee]

The Hope Hotel - Southend seafront early 2000’s

 

[happypig]

1984. Cardiff. Went on a training course and, at the time, you could claim £30 a night lodging allowance;. When you got the course details you also got a list of B&Bs and most people booked the cheapest so you had a few quid to spend on beer. I found one for £8 a night staying with a Mrs Williams. Not saying she was old but she'd probably been in her prime during the war (although which one...).
Her house was like something you see in those "living museums" in Birmingham & Newcastle, coal fires, 2 watt light bulbs etc.
Mrs Williams was about three feet high and greeted me with "I don't allow women in the house and I lock the door at eleven."
After tea of a quarter of a tin of salmon, two potatos and a lettuce leaf I went to the pub.
Came out of the pub when it shut at ten-thirty, went back to my room and found a bloke asleep in the other bed.
Next day I found somewhere a bit more expensive.

 

[cheshunt seagull]

There are a couple of contenders.

- One near Jardin Des Plantes in Paris 5 years ago which was chosen by our French business hosts. Sheets damp, shower jet came out sideways, heating broken so you had to put on more clothes to got to bed. Cheap cardboard 'wall' meant that I heard every element of my flatulent neighbour's morning ablutions. It was also quite expensive. Trip Advisor called it charmingly bohemian.

- I was touring with my parents in 1971 in empty northern Michigan and it was getting late so we were relieved to see huge signs for 'The Candlelight Inn; Color TV with Pool.' 3 run-down wooden chalets tacked on to a redneck bar with a rusty round tub (the pool) that backed on to a creepy abandoned fairground. Would be a great film set.

 

[DavidRyder]

Having this discussion with my youngest boy tonight and three come to mind.

3rd . Lakeview guest house in Pushkar, India where a communal shower overflow ran through the room
2nd. Old city youth hostel in Jerusalem. Room interior visible to anyone in the street who could jump up. Somebody for some reason
had scrawled on the wall in large letters the word 'WHY'

1st and the winner by a country mile. The central hotel in Macau. Ladies of the night in the lobby, the hotel was a death trap, damp, exposed electricity wires, stains covering carpets, sheets and beds, insects everywhere and the only room ever where I slept in a chair covered in a towel all night.

Anyone got and similar horror stories

Nooo, I won't have that. There's a place in Eastbourne...

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

Probably the Ibiza Rocks in San Antonio.We had been using it's predecessor Club Paraiso for years,but the new owners turned it into a Palma Nova-type rat infested tip virtually overnight.

This is nearby-ish. http://www.cervezaibosim.com/en/beers/

If you’re there tail end July early Aug I’ll even buy you a pint

 

[carlzeiss]

Normanton Park Hotel Croydon , I haven't stayed there but spent a day working as a contractor resulting in the theft of a expensive item of equipment .

Check out the reviews of this establishment here :-

https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Hotel...ark_Hotel-Croydon_Greater_London_England.html

 

[crabface]

The Sussex Hotel in Bexhill, booked into stay the night before a wedding. On arriving i was met by some very loud Kareoke in the downstairs bar, went up to the desk to check in and was asked to sign a blank piece of paper to confirm my stay.

Went up to the room and was met by the worlds oldest bed and sheets that didnt look like they had ever been changed. Kareoke went on till 3am including a local singing who had no teeth.

On heading down for breakfast in the morning, the staff were wearing the same clothes from the night before and plonked a plate in front of me that consisted of beans and a piece of bacon that looked like it had been regurgitated by a previous occupant.

Some interesting reviews here: https://www.tripadvisor.co.uk/Hotel...Hotel-Bexhill_on_Sea_East_Sussex_England.html

 

[Surf's Up]

The Leaking Boot - Grimsby....stayed there for the end of season (2003?) game vs Grimsby. It was like a 3rd world country and don't ask me about the state of the shared (between maybe 10 rooms!!) toilet when I needed a dump after the so-called breakfast!!!

 

[pearl]

two come to mind
room above a pub in Darlington, 40 watt bulb and sticky lino on the floor, breakfast included the smallest fried egg I've ever seen.

A hotel in Tarbes (France), overnight stay between trains. Kept awake all night by very drunk French men in the downstairs bar. Shared bog was so cramped when I sat on it my knees pushed the door open! (I'm 5ft 3)

 

[MattBackHome]

Somewhere in Ao Nang. Literal hell.

 

[Easy 10]

The Sun Gezgin, Marmaris, Turkey.

The "pool" was about the size of a snooker table, filled with green murky water. Nobody went in it. Ever. In the evenings, they'd put a wooden cover over it and arrange some tables and chairs on the top, as there was barely any more room there for anyone to sit outside. Some of the staff slept outdoors on a moth-eaten sofa at the back of the hotel outside the kitchen. The lift was so small, crushingly slow, ancient and rickety (one of those ones you pull the cage across on). You couldn't fit more than 4 people inside, or no more than 2 with 1 suitcase. Which meant various return journies just to get your luggage upstairs. The room was utter shithouse, stained walls and ceilings, cracked tiles in the bathroom, randomly intermittent hot water.

All that on top of the fact that I hate hate HATED Marmaris with a passion. Its basically a giant West Street, stuffed to the rafters with swivel-eyed heavily tattooed goons, slags, yobbos, cretins, wastrels all lurching around day and night pissed as farts and off their tits on ketamine. I could not get away from the place quick enough. The missus dropped us into the middle of this living nightmare because the (photoshopped) pics of the hotel right on the beachfront looked nice, she thought. Thats the last time I've EVER lazily just left a booking to her with an "I don't mind love, just somewhere hot".

With the Sun Gezgin at the epicentre of a strategic strike, they should just napalm that entire hellhole out of existence and start again.

 

[Lower West Stander]

A couple spring to mind but for different reasons.

A few years ago I went on an analyst trip to China and we stayed in a hotel on the waterfront at Yantai. Looked ok and the rooms were good with a decent view.

It was only when went down to dinner we discovered the place was just a massive knocking shop. When we sat down, no one could understand why we’re all a space apart from each other at the table. After about ten minutes a bunch of attractive ladies walked in and sat in the empty seats. They were dressed “provocatively” and proceeded to laugh at everything we said and were overly tactile to say the least. After we had eaten they all followed us into the bar and made it very clear what they wanted to happen next.

I’d had enough by this point and went up to my room. Only to discover there were another bunch of them on my floor all dressed in kimonos! Ignored them and went to bed.

Next morning at breakfast we all just looked at each other and said “did that really happen?”. No idea if any of my colleagues took up the offer.

Second one is the Norbreck in Blackpool. Just a shithole occupied by noisy oiks.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[Guinness Boy]

The Adelphi in Liverpool. This is the review one of our party left on trip adviser after the Liverpool game in May.

I have never stayed in a hotel quite like the Adelphi, ever. I have stayed in some hell holes too. Me, my dad and his friends booked a night in the Adelphi whilst in Liverpool for the football. inflated price of £240 per room as the football was on, was in excusable. Beside the hotel image and decor being repulsive, the room we were unfortunately given (456) was tiny, 2 single beds squashed together. Boiling hot, wondows wouldn't open and the air con was out of action. I had to sleep on the covers because I was close to medium rare at this point, boiling. The shower was laughable too temperatures; boiling or freezing. You have to run around the shower to get wet, felt dirtier when I left the bathroom. The breakfast was an absolute car crash. Absolutely disgusting, trip advisor doesn't allow enough characters for me to express the horror of the breakfast. Staff wouldn't clean the table, we sat and ate next to dirty plates, finally after persisting the waitress did move them. Staff moved one party member to a different room after we complained, but could do nothing for us (456). The prison cell should be valued at £50 tops regardless if the footballs on, luckily I had a few drinks before going back to the cell so I could manage. The place needs far more than a lick of paint and some TLC it is disgusting. Old, Drab, Dirty. Horrendous is being polite. Do not stay here, unless you have lost a bet!

Mate of mine is a Liverpool STH who travels up from London. Three of us (all Brighton) did the weekend up there for our game and we were originally going to meet him up there but he was called away at the last minute. The first bit of advice he gave us on our Whatsapp group was "under NO circumstances stay at the Adelphi. It's an expensive shithole"

A couple spring to mind but for different reasons.

A few years ago I went on an analyst trip to China and we stayed in a hotel on the waterfront at Yantai. Looked ok and the rooms were good with a decent view.

It was only when went down to dinner we discovered the place was just a massive knocking shop. When we sat down, no one could understand why we’re all a space apart from each other at the table. After about ten minutes a bunch of attractive ladies walked in and sat in the empty seats. They were dressed “provocatively” and proceeded to laugh at everything we said and were overly tactile to say the least. After we had eaten they all followed us into the bar and made it very clear what they wanted to happen next.

I’d had enough by this point and went up to my room. Only to discover there were another bunch of them on my floor all dressed in kimonos! Ignored them and went to bed.

Next morning at breakfast we all just looked at each other and said “did that really happen?”. No idea if any of my colleagues took up the offer.

Second one is the Norbreck in Blackpool. Just a shithole occupied by noisy oiks.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

Played ex-pat football in Taiwan when I was living over there. There was a tournament every quarter and they were all over the island. The autumn tournamnent one year was in Tainan, a place where, at the time, the girls selling beetle nut from huts on the road went naked after midnight. The players were booked in to a "players hotel" and the coach and his mate booked a 4 star "management hotel". The players hotel called itself Business Mans Hotel in its English translation but was, of course, a knocking shop. As we checked in our hands were scanned for wedding rings and those not wearing one were asked "you want fukky-fukky?".

I went upstairs and while there were free, non-stop adult movies on the default TV channel the shower had seen better days and the bed was only intended for one thing, and that was not sleep. Presumably as some sort of protection for the girls you could also turn on the room lights from the outside. More of that later.

We went out to a few bars including one that was also very obvioiusly a knocking shop, but after 3am everywhere seemed closed (unlike Taipei which is a 24 hours city). Presumably this was why everyone made their own entertainment of a weekend. We got a beer in a 7-11 but drinking it on a street corner wasn't the same so I retired back to the room, to be joined in the lift by a girl wearing a mini skirt and not much else carrying a French Tickler.

I'd just about got to an alcohol induced sleep through next door's moaning when Bolly, our Polish/Irish striker (and there's a combo that makes you mad as a hatter) turned on my room lights from the outside and screamed "WAKE UP YOU F***ING BORING ENGLISH C***, I'M GOING BACK OUT".

The breakfast was so disgusting that there was no one sat down to eat it when I took a look. I wandered over the road to McDonalds to find the whole team ordering Mc Muffins.

We didn't play so well on the Sunday.

 

[Trufflehound]

The Black Coffee Hotel in Chengdu, China. A former bomb shelter, it was built in underground vaulted rooms with no windows and no ventilation. Once inside you lost track of time, and you got periodically concussed by banging your head on the low ceilings. Humidity was around 100%, so everything you owned became permanently damp, and there was always moisture dripping off the mouldy walls. The passage to the communal showers involved walking on loose brick stepping stones across a flooded corridor and side-stepping the breaststroking rats. Once you got to the showers the walls were black with mould, and the shower 'water' was actually super-heated steam that left users with second-degree burns. The toilets were just a communal gutter with no running water where the turds got flushed away with a hose regularly once a day, whether they needed it or not.

I stayed there a week.

In Thailand I nominate the On On Hotel. Part of The Beach was filmed there - it was supposedly the place Leonardo di Caprio stayed in Bangkok, except that it was actually in Phuket Town. Just your standard Asian Chinese hotel (i.e walls that don't meet the floor or ceiling) but the infestation of cockroaches had to be seen to be believed - I'm talking THOUSANDS per room, rather than the odd one or two.

And many such cheap places in Asia double up as short-term brothels as well as hotels and rat, cockroach 'n' bedbug farms. There's nothing like coming back to your room and seeing the manager in the hall, peeking through the keyhole of the room next door, jerking himself off in time to the goings-on he was watching (that was in Baguio in the Philippines - fortunately I forget the name of the hotel).

Stayed in a lovely place in Gorkha, Nepal, where the floors were concrete, the walls bare breezeblocks, and the windows were just holes in the wall, no glass or anything.

 

[Boroseagull]

This year, May in fact - I left a cruise ship at Vancouver harbour and thought 2 nights in the city would be rather pleasant. Well it probably would have been except for a dreadful mistake of booking the Patricia Hotel - East Hastings Street - Vancouver. Struggling with suitcases outside the harbour I asked the very affable Canadians we met where East Hastings Street was - incredulous looks and a forthright 'you really don't want to go there' answer. In the end our party of 4 found a taxi driver to take us (it was only a couple of blocks away), albeit with some reluctance. Approaching the street we soon saw why - the drug ridden, drop out, waster capitol of Canada was before our eyes. Never in all the cities in the world in my life have I seen anything like it before. Filthy, dirty people acting like zombies, pavements filled with dirty rags and cardboard - and our hotel was in this street!

The bouncer let us in, although he did ask why good looking folks like us were staying here - good start. Our room? Well, basic is the word, just about fitted wife & I, but our suitcases needed to be stacked on top of each other. The room shared a wall with the lift shaft, and the lift was operating 24 hrs a day - I'm sure they rented rooms by the hour at night. No air-con and the room stifling. Bathroom? Ha - a shower with a wonderful selection of mould growing, a loo and a sliding door that didn't! The washbasin was in the bedroom. An interesting selection of stains on the wall and the single bedside cabinet, as for the floor carpet we were so glad to have taken the slippers from our cruise cabin!

The only good thing about the place was (as it was unsafe to venture out after dark) they had their own micro brewery pub and the food was reasonably good, a further bonus was Wednesday evening was R & B night and the group were brilliant. But the hotel - YUK!!

2 nights at this hotel seemed a lifetime but a Greyhound bus down to Seattle and a stay of 2 nights at a wonderful hotel near Sea-Tac redressed the situation, as did Seattle - wonderful city!

 

[Goldstone1976]

God, I thought I had some bad hotel stories, but they pale into utter insignificance compared to some on this thread.

 

[Guinness Boy]

And many such cheap places in Asia double up as short-term brothels as well as hotels and rat, cockroach 'n' bedbug farms. There's nothing like coming back to your room and seeing the manager in the hall, peeking through the keyhole of the room next door, jerking himself off in time to the goings-on he was watching (that was in Baguio in the Philippines - fortunately I forget the name of the hotel).

.

One of the guys I worked with in Taipei was a big rasta who talked like Ali G (and was also sadly a Palace fan). He'd moved there from a project in Bangkok. His reason? "When you walk to work and you see man eating poontang for breakfast it's time to leave"