The most stupid Shoplifter EVER!

[Basil Fawlty]

Today at work. The call was for code five, which means every male in the shop has to become a Security guard. I bolted out the door, but I decided to wait for back up. Because in this day and age, you just don't know what would happen. When I got back-up. Our temperaily Duty Manager caught up with him by his car putting in the goods into his boot, and we demanded the goods back. But I've missed one thing out, this man walked out with £140 worth of goods. He handed over the goods, then started walking with us. But then pegged it out of the car-park. He left the car open. In the car, there was a baby buggy, and baby car-seat.

So imagine this. The Son- "So what did you do today Daddy?"
Daddy- " I went shopping Son."

 

[Evil Edna]

ahhh the old code 5

 

[Southover Street Seagull]

Why was he the most stupid shoplifter ever?

 

[Gotsmanov]

Who stole the baby?

 

[NMH]

Why was "every male in the shop" having to "become a security guard"?

Why did the temporary Duty Manager catch up with him first, and not you?

Why did you say you missed one thing out, when you didn't even have to edit your post?

Will you be writing the next James Bond book?

 

[beorhthelm]

the most stupid shoplifter story ever, methinks. take some english writing lessons and try again, i couldnt follow that brain dump.

 

[Mendoza]

this is no way as good as the Wedding Zinger!!!

 

[Uncle C]

If everyone including the shop lifters know about code 5 then its no longer a code and why not just announce "we have a shoplifter".

 

[Barrel of Fun]

How did we know the baby was a son and would he be of the age to construct a sentence like that?

Technically we can add lying to the list of misdemeanours as the father wasn't 'shopping', as he told his 'son', that would involve exchanging money for goods.


When working at Cheltenham as a steward, our code name was 'Mr Walker'.

Mr Walker has left the stadium - A fire
Mr Walker has lost his son - Fight etc. etc.

 

[Stoichkov]

He handed over the goods, then started walking with us. But then pegged it out of the car-park.

Amazing. Thats the first time I think someone has 'pegged it' since the late 80's

 

[Stinkers Bridge]

What is a code 4 ?

What is a code 3 ?

What is a code 2 ?

What is a code 1 ?

 

[Johnny Crumplin Football]

Amazing. Thats the first time I think someone has 'pegged it' since the late 80's

Almosts as rare as scarpered

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Just like spomething out of Black Hawk Down - we have a code 5 I repeat we have a code 5.

Cue four sweaty students coming out of the staff room to take on the bloodthirsty hordes of downtown Mogadishu armed with a walkie-talkie that has a range of 5 yards and a half-eaten Subway.

Must be a really potent deterrent to would-be shop lifters.

He sounded a real hardened criminal - 'he handed the goods over and then started walking with us' - must have been nerve-racking - you;re right you necer know what could happen so you were right to wait for back-up. He could have pushed you against the car or thrown a Twix at you.

Glad you had the bugger nailed down and secure - 'then he pegged it'.

All round good job by your security team then eh!??

 

[Gazwag]

Maybe it was a stolen car.

And what thing did you miss out.

Did you get chance to put your Robin outfit on

 

[Gazwag]

Amazing. Thats the first time I think someone has 'pegged it' since the late 80's

In todays Argus: -

Kev on the right, temperaily Duty Manager on the left with the still open car.

 

[Easy 10]

So imagine this. The Son- "So what did you do today Daddy?"
Daddy- " I went shopping Son."

The Son- "Well where the f*** is the CAR then ?"

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Or:

Son: ' That's the third this time this week you've come back with f*** all Dad'

 

[Barrel of Fun]

Or:

Son: 'Never mind that. We've got a code brown going on here'

 

[Nibble]

Chances are it wasn't even his car and was probably borrowed to shoplift in. A lot of pro shoplifters share cars.

Also your shop is extremely irresponsible asking it's staff to become security. A man who is walking out of your store with goods is not an urgent assistance case. If he was kicking off I could understand but even then you shouldn't be expected to step in, nor should you if you are not licensed or insured and your manager should know better. He should also fork out for some security not just for stock loss but to protect his staff. But them retail managers and heads are notoriously tight.

 

[Buttinhams]

Did he look anything like this?