The Apprentice 2016 thread

[Pavilionaire]

There's a fine crop of snatch there. Setting Skybox to Series Link...

 

[Badger]

Some offices will be missing their BELLCHEESE for a few weeks.

Who do we think is going to be the overconfident one who "steps up to the plate" to lead the team on the first week? Only to completely COCK everything up and get booted out before they've even moved into the house. My money is on monobrow.

 

[LlcoolJ]

"Sometimes I feel like James Bond when I'm in my suit..." blathers Oliver Nohl-Oser (wtf?).

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/profiles/106Qp3mGBmfCBXgVkp119fb/oliver-nohl-oser

That's nice for you, but unfortunately Oliver, everyone else is seeing Tim Nice But Dim. Not James Bond, not at all actually....

 

[bhafc99]

That BBC gallery puts you off any of the totty. You look at the scrubbed-up studio shots of, say, Alexsandra and Jessica, and you would. And then you look at the real-life shots down below, and... nah.

 

[LlcoolJ]

He's 37, runs a men's beachwear company.

He's 37!? That tough paper round didn't help him lose any weight.

 

[el punal]

Obvious that Dillon will be the first one fired. You can always tell who the first one to go will be when these are released.

That Dillon is definitely Lorne Malvo from Fargo - the TV series.

 

[Badger]

There's a BLOKE called Courtney.

He looks like he should either be in a boyband, or work as an estate agent. I am curious to know what kind of "novelty gifts" his company produces.

 

[LlcoolJ]

That BBC gallery puts you off any of the totty. You look at the scrubbed-up studio shots of, say, Alexsandra and Jessica, and you would. And then you look at the real-life shots down below, and... nah.

There's been some serious turd polishing going on there. Oliver looks even more like TNBD without the smoke and mirrors.

 

[happypig]

Dillon St.Paul will be this year's absolute WANKER.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p048trss

"I'm FAMOUS for the TRUTH BOMB". Yeah, well famous.

 

[MattBackHome]

"Good morning everyone. Now we're here in the world famous Tate Modern.

Now art is big business. Every year people spend millions to decorate their homes with pieces of art.

Now I want YOU to sell as much art as possible. You gotta find the art and sell it for as much profit as you can. Ok?

And when you canvas for suctomers, don't paint yourselves into a corner or you won't be able to brush it off in the boardroom. Understood?

Now for the teams. Jamal? I want you to join Team Thrust. Sinead, you go over to Team Priapism."

 

[Blue Valkyrie]

Obvious that Dillon will be the first one fired. You can always tell who the first one to go will be when these are released.

Haven't they already lined up potential first fire-ees for both the men and the women so that the 'good tv' candidates don't get binned in week 1 ?

 

[Billy the Fish]

And then you look at the real-life shots down below, and... nah.

Nuts or Zoo must've got the glamour shoots in early this year, are they both really hairy then?

 

[Garry Nelson's teacher]

Here we go again: totally formulaic +horribly contrived + ghastly people trying to impress an even ghastlier one = compulsive viewing.

 

[Raleigh Chopper]

I don't like Karren Brady she is lucky and useless.

 

[scamander]

I daresay it gets posted on here each year but just in case...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ss-59fi4nM

 

[Westdene Seagull]

There's a BLOKE called Courtney.

He looks like he should either be in a boyband, or work as an estate agent. I am curious to know what kind of "novelty gifts" his company produces.

He doesn't even look old enough to have pubes !

 

[Lady Whistledown]

This chap probably sprays himself with a cologne called Alpha Male. Also from Essex. High chance of him being a total weapon, I'd imagine.

 

[Bry Nylon]

He doesn't even look old enough to have pubes !

Have to say, I'm glad it isn't my IP address linked to that statement on an internet message board...

Expect Inspector Knacker of the Yard to be round presently, Westdene...

 

[Wrong-Direction]

"I'm the female version of Jim Carrey"

Hope there's more babes like this

Sent from my SM-A310F using Tapatalk

 

[Bry Nylon]

Late entry: Samuel from Wembley. Samuel lists tact, discretion and judgement among his many qualities.

"Everybody at work calls me Big Sam. My wife calls me a Big ****."