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SHould I give him some LETTUCE ?

Should Bruce get his LETTUCE ?

  • YES - give it to him Easy, you f***ing TYRANT. Seed must be WELL boring. Lettuce is probably one of

    Votes: 18 36.7%

  • NO - Bruce must learn some RESPECT. How dare he try to BITE the hand that feeds him. Lettuce rations

    Votes: 20 40.8%

  • Are you some kind of spacko Easy ? Go and do something USEFUL with your afternoon, instead of menata

    Votes: 11 22.4%
  • Total voters
    49


Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,426
Location Location


Bruce is after something. He's not actually HUNGRY, because he has both seed AND millet in his cage. No, he'd invading my favourite armchair because he has one thing on his birdy brain right now, and thats a nice big juicy LETTUCE LEAF thats been run under the tap. Now normally I'd feed it to him without a second thought. However, Bruce has MACKED me off recently in a couple of ways.

1. He LUNGED at me last night when I was changing his water, and when I chastised him, he skulked back to his perch and HISSED at me.

2. He started screeching at seagulls at about 7am this morning. Not normally a problem, but I'm currently enjoying a few days off work, and the LAST thing I want to hear in the morning is this gobby bastard giving it LARGE first thing in the morning from the safety of his cage to a bird that could comfortably swallow him whole.

Therefore, I place Bruce's lettuce fate in the hands of the NSC bretheren. Do I (once again) give in to his INCESSANT demands and give him the damn lettuce. Or do I refuse, and teach the squawky little tosser a LESSON ?
 




B

B.M.F

New member
Aug 2, 2003
7,272
wherever the money is
He should be punished and learn to respect his master.
 


Barrel of Fun

Barrel of Fun

Abort, retry, fail
Aug 22, 2005
52,833
Sūþsēaxe: The Land of the South Saxons
Bruce needs to be put in his place. He must realise that he is an inferior species to us. The lettuce leaf will have to wait until he has learned some manners and accepts that you are his master. If he does not play ball then you must tell him about birds that are being eaten by Pelicans, in St James Park and how the Brighton to London link is only 48 minutes on the fast train.
 


Uncle C

Uncle C

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2004
11,711
Bishops Stortford
Wring its f***ing neck - vermin:wave: :yawn:
 


R

REDLAND

Active member
Jul 7, 2003
9,443
At the foot of the downs
Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!
 






Guinness Boy

Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,354
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
Not only would I hold back the cheaky beggers lettuce - I'd take it out of the fridge, add some tomatoes and dressing and eat a nice SALAD in front of him. That'll learn him for macking you off.
 


Commander

Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,581
London
REDLAND said:
Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!
Click to expand...

Yeah, and I'm sure he'll survive for a long time, won't he?
 




Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,426
Location Location
REDLAND said:
Let him go free, keeping animals in cages for self gratification is wrong !!
Click to expand...
He's not in a feckin cage, he's on my ARMCHAIR (as usual).
And thats ANOTHER thing. He shat all down the back of it the other day. Nope, I'm afraid its all stacking up for millet-boy....
 


Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,426
Location Location
Marshy said:
Your sofa disturbs me greatly Easy........:D
Click to expand...
That was the missus's choice. And comfy though it is, her choice in men is clearly just as poor.

:down:
 


Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,426
Location Location
Guinness Boy said:
Not only would I hold back the cheaky beggers lettuce - I'd take it out of the fridge, add some tomatoes and dressing and eat a nice SALAD in front of him. That'll learn him for macking you off.
Click to expand...
That is an EXCELLENT shout, G B.
I am a notorious salad-dodger, but in this case, I think I'll make an exception.
 






Guinness Boy

Guinness Boy

Tofu eating wokerati
Helpful Moderator
NSC Patron
Jul 23, 2003
37,354
Up and Coming Sunny Portslade
He shat on your armchair? Right forget my last post, take his lettuce and add chicken, bacon, parmesan and croutons and eat a full CEASAR in front of him. While drooling and smacking your lips.

A man's armchair is SACRED :smokin:
 


Commander

Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,581
London
Easy 10 said:
He's not in a feckin cage, he's on my ARMCHAIR (as usual).
And thats ANOTHER thing. He shat all down the back of it the other day. Nope, I'm afraid its all stacking up for millet-boy....
Click to expand...

Punish him, Easy. Clip his wings or something.
 




R

rospants

off to ronan in the park!
Jul 11, 2005
2,059
brighton
Perhaps hes playing up because he secretly hates lettuce, and knows that if hes naughty he wont get any. I think you should force feed him the lettuce, that'll teach him
 


Marshy

Marshy

Well-known member
Jul 6, 2003
19,955
FRUIT OF THE BLOOM
Easy 10 said:
That was the missus's choice. And comfy though it is, her choice in men is clearly just as poor.

:down:
Click to expand...

its got to be late eighties early nighties....
i was expecting 3 geese flying up the wall as well to be honest.
 


Commander

Commander

Arrogant Prat
NSC Patron
Apr 28, 2004
13,581
London


Easy 10

Easy 10

Brain dead MUG SHEEP
Jul 5, 2003
62,426
Location Location
Marshy said:
its got to be late eighties early nighties....
i was expecting 3 geese flying up the wall as well to be honest.
Click to expand...
laurence_lb.jpg

"Oh your sofa is soooo 90's"
- Marshy, yesterday.
 






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