[Help] Sad, but necessary advice needed. Dog put to sleep..

[sydney]

Not the cheeriest of posts, but our (specifically Mrs Nose's as she has always been her dog) Cavalier King Charles Spaniel is a month away from being 14 years old - and has had a degenerative condition where her head tilts and her back legs are losing control. The vet thinks she may have had multiple mini-strokes, along with a common syndrome where the spine and rear legs start losing communication with the brain, and she's not living a life I would call fulfilled in any sense. She keeps losing bladder and bowel control every few days - and it's making the old girl thoroughly miserable, even though she doesn't appear to be in 'pain' as such.

We've used that last sentence for a few months now, but the old girl just hobbles around and falls over all the time - along with the messy accidents, and she can't walk more than 100 metres any more. She sleeps most of the time and when she's awake she gets no real pleasure from life. She's been such an active, happy, mischievous, loving, agile, active dog her whole life - and part of a loving family who adore her. It can't be pleasurable for her any more to be like this.

The time is coming where we need to start thinking of having the old lady (her name is Poppy) put to sleep, but it's not something I've been through before.

I'm looking for practical advice from people who have experienced the same thing. Do you 'book a time / day' - or do you make the wait as short as possible and just say to the vet 'what have you got, and soon'?

After the deed has happened, do you literally get presented with your dead pet? Does the vet 'store' the pet for you? (we want her cremated at Raystede), or do we have to ring Raystede and get them to liaise with the vet? Or, do we take her straight to Raystede for 'storage'?

I literally have no idea, so I'd really appreciate a plan of action from someone who has been through this... I'd usually just hit Google for my problems, but this is different.

I don't often ask for help here, but you're good and caring people and I'm sure you can help in what is going to be a real wrench for the whole family...

your pup is lucky she hasn't got an NHS number , if she did they would keep her alive till the bitter end .....is she in pain or distress or happy and daft , only you know ....xx

 

[Knocky's Nose]

Update...

I rang the vets at 9am this morning and we had the option of 11.30am this morning, but we felt that was very sudden.

She's going to be fussed and pampered today and tonight, then tomorrow late morning we're taking her down to the vets.

It'll be a huge 'release' for us all, as well as the upset. Seeing her slowly deteriorate, day by day, has been upsetting for us all to watch for almost 9 months now - with it now resulting in her only single pleasure in life is the five minutes she spends eating her dinner. No walks longer than 100 yards, she can't go up and down stairs to follow us round the house like she used to, and she pretty much every time now falls back into her poos and wees when her legs go. It's not fair on her.

So, loads of love tonight - and tomorrow she can be a dog again, begging for food and running around like a puppy being annoying with all our 'rellies' up above.

Thank you all, again, sincerely.

 

[sydney]

Update...

I rang the vets at 9am this morning and we had the option of 11.30am this morning, but we felt that was very sudden.

She's going to be fussed and pampered today and tonight, then tomorrow late morning we're taking her down to the vets.

It'll be a huge 'release' for us all, as well as the upset. Seeing her slowly deteriorate, day by day, has been upsetting for us all to watch for almost 9 months now - with it now resulting in her only single pleasure in life is the five minutes she spends eating her dinner. No walks longer than 100 yards, she can't go up and down stairs to follow us round the house like she used to, and she pretty much every time now falls back into her poos and wees when her legs go. It's not fair on her.

So, loads of love tonight - and tomorrow she can be a dog again, begging for food and running around like a puppy being annoying with all our 'rellies' up above.

Thank you all, again, sincerely.

you are doing the right thing mate , hard as it is ....it would be so much easier if they could talk ...

 

[Ooh it’s a corner]

Right choice KN - you’ll all be sad but she’ll be happy and then you will too - eventually honestly!!

 

[zefarelly]

you are doing the right thing mate , hard as it is ....it would be so much easier if they could talk ...

We've had this discussion. In some ways I'm pretty glad they can't!

Celebrate the life @Knockys Nose.

 

[SittingbourneSeagull]

Really sorry to hear that. We had to do the same with our much loved Whippet 2 years ago. Same sort of problem in that his legs kept giving out.

We had him put to sleep at the vets which wasn't pleasant (although that wasn't their fault) and would have opted for it to be done at home if I had thought of it, but sadly was a bit numb at the time.

We had the choice of a mass cremation or individual. We opted for the latter although much more expensive, and we got his ashes and spread them around all of his favourite walks and of course the garden.

Its horrible having to make these choices but you are being kinder in the long run. Best of luck.

 

[Doonhamer7]

our Jack Russell was put down when key hole surgery investigation showed she was riddled with cancer. we were given 4 options for the disposal : 1. Vet disposes off, 2. Cremation as individual, 3 cremation - as a group, 4. Come and collect the body.

 

[zefarelly]

our Jack Russell was put down when key hole surgery investigation showed she was riddled with cancer. we were given 4 options for the disposal : 1. Vet disposes off, 2. Cremation as individual, 3 cremation - as a group, 4. Come and collect the body.

Ashes seems logical/best. Knowing our luck, After a lifetime of harassing foxes, if we buried him in the garden the foxes would come and dig him up!

 

[Grizz]

We had our 14 year old Staffie put to sleep back in June and I have to admit I'm still devastated. She had a brain tumour and the time and date were pretty much thrust upon us, as we didn't know about it until she started having fits and she degenerated very quickly and within a week or two the day came when we had to make a decision. You could just tell the lights were on, but she wasn't really there anymore.

Things I learnt from that day. Make sure that if you want to be there at the end then your vet allows that. Ours was towards the end of the last lockdown and our vet wouldn't allow us in, said we'd just have to hand her over. We couldn't do that, so don't be frightened of saying no to that. We found another vet who had facilities to enable us to be there with Rosie and was happy to take her on and get the notes from our vet.

Have a chat now about what you want done about his ashes. They'll ask you about caskets or just in a nicely done packet depending on what cremation centre they use. If you take him in a collar or harness, do you want to keep that when they're done or let them donate it to a dog charity that can reuse it. Do be worried about sobbing your heart out in front of strangers, let it flow, christ I know I did.

Afterwards give each other time to process his death, but also talk about him a lot. Rosie was one of a kind, we looked at videos, photos and it was quite cathartic for us. Don't be in a hurry to remove things like blankets or beds or toys, but when you do just chat to each other and say are you ready, or do you mind if I put this away.

I think that's about it, though it's been 8 months now and I'll be honest I still fill up regularly when something catches me unaware. It was the most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced, even though I know it was the right thing to do for Rosie.

 

[Brovion]

Update...

I rang the vets at 9am this morning and we had the option of 11.30am this morning, but we felt that was very sudden.

She's going to be fussed and pampered today and tonight, then tomorrow late morning we're taking her down to the vets.

It'll be a huge 'release' for us all, as well as the upset. Seeing her slowly deteriorate, day by day, has been upsetting for us all to watch for almost 9 months now - with it now resulting in her only single pleasure in life is the five minutes she spends eating her dinner. No walks longer than 100 yards, she can't go up and down stairs to follow us round the house like she used to, and she pretty much every time now falls back into her poos and wees when her legs go. It's not fair on her.

So, loads of love tonight - and tomorrow she can be a dog again, begging for food and running around like a puppy being annoying with all our 'rellies' up above.

Thank you all, again, sincerely.

Got quite choked reading this thread, but 100% you are doing the right thing. We did exactly that with our last spaniel: we booked a slot for the next day and spent the time between the phone call and when it was time to take him down to the vets telling him how much we loved him. I was strangely ok until I got to the vets when I collapsed in a blubbering heap. They were brilliant (It was Grove Lodge down Preston Drove). After it was over we went for a walk and a BIG drink and talked abut him, and yes it did feel like a release. Sad but, well it will come to us all.

We've still got his ashes (and those of our other spaniel). They'll go with whichever of us goes first.

All the best.

 

[Icy Gull]

Update...

I rang the vets at 9am this morning and we had the option of 11.30am this morning, but we felt that was very sudden.

She's going to be fussed and pampered today and tonight, then tomorrow late morning we're taking her down to the vets.

It'll be a huge 'release' for us all, as well as the upset. Seeing her slowly deteriorate, day by day, has been upsetting for us all to watch for almost 9 months now - with it now resulting in her only single pleasure in life is the five minutes she spends eating her dinner. No walks longer than 100 yards, she can't go up and down stairs to follow us round the house like she used to, and she pretty much every time now falls back into her poos and wees when her legs go. It's not fair on her.

So, loads of love tonight - and tomorrow she can be a dog again, begging for food and running around like a puppy being annoying with all our 'rellies' up above.

Thank you all, again, sincerely.

It’ll be really hard for you but quick and painless for Poppy. Went through very similar to you with our 16 year old, also called Poppy in January 2019. We prevaricated (in truth I did, my wife had to convince me, but I was being selfish) for about a week and it still hurts remembering how upset we were after she was gone. Lots of tears but fabulous memories. Nobody can make it easy for you, just console yourself that you are doing the right thing

Feel for you

We didn’t think we’d ever get another dog but almost a year to the day afterwards we did, and we often call our new dog Poppy in error.

 

[maltaseagull]

I am crying while reading these posts.
We are about to go through this with our cat Iswed.
He was an abandoned cat the we took in in 2005. We think he is 16ish.
He has seen our grand kids grow up from toddlers.
End of last year he seemed to be panting. Vet diagnosed enlarged heart causing restrictions on his lungs.
No cure, tablets for treatment but only way to give him tablets is in his food but he's not eating as much.
He can still jump onto the sofa and bed but sleeps early all day. Still likes fuss.

We have to decide when suffering is too much v quality of life. Not easy.
Sympathy to all posters who have had to make this decision.

 

[PTC Gull]

A friend sent me this after we lost our Charley last year. She passed peacefully at home, and we were and still am, sad about it. But this helped a lot. Hope it helps you.

 

[atfc village]

We had our 14 year old Staffie put to sleep back in June and I have to admit I'm still devastated. She had a brain tumour and the time and date were pretty much thrust upon us, as we didn't know about it until she started having fits and she degenerated very quickly and within a week or two the day came when we had to make a decision. You could just tell the lights were on, but she wasn't really there anymore.

Things I learnt from that day. Make sure that if you want to be there at the end then your vet allows that. Ours was towards the end of the last lockdown and our vet wouldn't allow us in, said we'd just have to hand her over. We couldn't do that, so don't be frightened of saying no to that. We found another vet who had facilities to enable us to be there with Rosie and was happy to take her on and get the notes from our vet.

Have a chat now about what you want done about his ashes. They'll ask you about caskets or just in a nicely done packet depending on what cremation centre they use. If you take him in a collar or harness, do you want to keep that when they're done or let them donate it to a dog charity that can reuse it. Do be worried about sobbing your heart out in front of strangers, let it flow, christ I know I did.

Afterwards give each other time to process his death, but also talk about him a lot. Rosie was one of a kind, we looked at videos, photos and it was quite cathartic for us. Don't be in a hurry to remove things like blankets or beds or toys, but when you do just chat to each other and say are you ready, or do you mind if I put this away.

I think that's about it, though it's been 8 months now and I'll be honest I still fill up regularly when something catches me unaware. It was the most heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced, even though I know it was the right thing to do for Rosie.

Mate i still get teary now 21 months after losing my dog . He is always there in memories ,places we used to walk him i can still picture him when i go there now.

 

[Super Steve Earle]

It's worse to keep a pet because you can't say goodbye, than to let them struggle on. Best to let go with no regrets. It comes to all pet lovers in the end. When we took our much loved cat to the vet for the final time, we'd probably held on to him for a week too long. It's hard. The vet was lovely and our cat died peacefully in my wife's arms. We went back a week or two later and picked up the ashes in a little casket with a brass plaque. I can't imagine taking home his warm body. The casket was buried in the garden under the bird table and we removed the plaque to pop it on the bird table. He was much loved and incredibly missed, to the extent that only now, 7 years later, we are thinking of another pet. But we have always kept his photo out and still have a little word with his memory as we pass by.

 

[Trevor]

Only done cats. The thing I would say is this is your last gift to your pet. You have made the difficult and correct decision that you do not want to put her through further suffering and that her quality of life is not really there. The event itself will be very peaceful. All the very best

 

[Knocky's Nose]

Once again, a final thank you to everyone who contributed to this thread. She was very peacefully, calmly and lovingly put to sleep at Midday today. No stress, done by the same vet who gave her the 8-week injections when she was a little puppy (so she was pleased to see him again this morning, as she always was).

Now to move on, remember the good times, and know that she's at peace.

Here she is, with her sad 'scrounging' face on. Always worked a charm on us soft-arses...



RIP Poppy, and to all the pets the good people here on NSC have loved and lost.

 

[dazzer6666]

This thread is NSC at it's very best.

RIP Poppy.

 

[Lenny Rider]

Saddest day of my life, Cassie was riddled with cancer, actually took her in to the Vets room and just as the vet was putting her down she started wagging her tail.

Had her wrapped in a blanket, went straight back to work placed her in an infants casket and then one of the gents at work buried her in my back garden, we later have had a small tasteful head stone put on the spot.

Take care Knocky

 

[lawros left foot]

Once again, a final thank you to everyone who contributed to this thread. She was very peacefully, calmly and lovingly put to sleep at Midday today. No stress, done by the same vet who gave her the 8-week injections when she was a little puppy (so she was pleased to see him again this morning, as she always was).

Now to move on, remember the good times, and know that she's at peace.

Here she is, with her sad 'scrounging' face on. Always worked a charm on us soft-arses...

View attachment 133702

RIP Poppy, and to all the pets the good people here on NSC have loved and lost.

Thinking of you today, mate.

One of the hardest things you’ll ever have to do. I had to have my Dalmatian , Spot ( I know) put down, a few years ago now. He became epileptic and was fitting about 40 times a day in his last week. It still breaks my heart, and although I did the right thing, and it would have been cruel not to do it, there’s still a little of me that feels guilty. I don’t even really know what for.