Parliamentary Labour Party imploding

[Thunder Bolt]

A man of principle it seems, though.

Isn't that the Labour supporters wanted? A man who sticks to his principles?

 

[JC Footy Genius]

A massive amount I would say. Many of the people I come into contact on a daily basis actually get their understanding of the current state of the nation directly from what they hear or read in the media. If the press say an individual is a clown most people blindly believe it as they don't have the time to research the real facts behind any story.

That may be true but having the press portray an individual as a clown doesn't necessarily effect voting intentions, the Current Mayor of London being a prime example.

 

[pastafarian]

From Labour-uncut website

The A-Z of Corbsplaining

There’s been a lot of change in the Labour party of late – new people joining, new faces at the top and new language being used.

To help readers, Uncut has produced this handy guide to Corbsplaining, keeping you up to date with the party’s exciting new vocabulary.

Print it out, take it to your local CLP meeting and dazzle Labour friends and colleagues with your Corbsplaining skills.

Next stop, the NEC!

A

Assist members making their voice heard*


*Use veteran hard left organisers to corral a herd of £3 hipsters to deselect troublesome MPs.

Austerity – Any cut to public spending, of any kind, at any point, by any level of government.

Does not include cuts to military spending, which are completely different and fine.

B

Britain– Socialist utopia with a progressive majority that opposes all austerity

Apart from at general elections

Burnhamite– A malleable substance that can bend and merge to form any shape required of it before ultimately imploding.

C

Corbynite– A rare and abstruse substance that destroys the trust of voters.

Campaign Group – A group of MPs who do not campaign but do tweet a lot.

D

Democracy – A vital part of civilisation, to be protected and supported at all costs.

*Not applicable to residents of Iran, Russia, Donbass, Gaza, Lebanon*or*Venezuela.

E

Engaging in the name of peace – chillaxing with terrorists.

F

Friends– a neutral term that in no way conveys warmth or respect.

What? Those guys? Sure, we had a few beers, high-fived a few times, played a short game of ‘Holocaust: fact or fiction’ and, yes, we hugged. But honestly, I barely know them.

G

Government – An oppressive institution that corrupts any who serve in it. Something that Tories, red Tories and imperialists ignobly aspire to run.

H

Hilary Benn– “A Benn not a Bennite.” Although quite happy to work for one.

I

Israel– The country that must-not-be-named, like a geographical Voldemort.

J

JC –Initials of both Jesus Christ and Jeremy Corbyn. Coincidence?

Jeremy Corbyn– Visionary. Genius. Cardigan-wearer.

K

Kinder, gentler politics– The practice of constructive and vibrant democratic protest.

Features include shouting, “Red Tory scum,” and the generous gift of high-velocity saliva.

L

Livingstone– Combination of intellectual touchstone and jobbing recruitment consultant, finding policies and advisers for the dear leader.

M

Miliband– Previous leader of the Labour party, whose ideas were insufficiently leftist, causing the electorate to vote Conservative in protest.

Momentum– A spontaneous social movement, rising up to enact change in Britain.

Not at all run by hard left organisers to deselect Labour MPs with absolutely no connection to Militant infiltrators expelled from the Labour party a generation ago.

N

Neo-liberal– Believers in the market. Known to burn villages, eat babies and join the parliamentary Labour party in order to propagate pro-village-burning and baby-eating polices.

New politics– What to call the absence of a party policy. Allows the shadow cabinet and the leader to hold opposing views without anyone looking incoherent or shambolic. Apparently.

O

Osborne– Cunning and evil manipulator of the working class’ false consciousness. Preys on voters by talking about their concerns in a language they understand.

P

The Prime Minister– What the leader of Conservative party is called until at least 2025.

The People– People who live in North London and/or work in the public sector.

Prior diary commitment– What you organise quickly just after the Labour party press office schedule a tricky interview.

Q

people’s QE– The printing presses of the Weimar republic.

R

Red Tory– Honorific, often suffixed with the word “scum.” Applied to anyone in the Labour party who does not have a “Jez We Can” twibbon on their Twitter profile.

S

Smear –The journalistic practice of reproducing past statements by the leader and shadow chancellor, then asking them whether they still hold these views

Shadow First Secretary of State– A prestigious appointment to the frontbench. Definitely not a tokenistic afterthought.

Suit– the favoured attire of the paterno-capitalist class.

T

Tax avoidance– Magical source of unlimited funds which will be forthcoming*following a “government crackdown.”

Trident –A three-pointed spear, which will be standard issue for all British forces as a result of vital cuts to defence spending.

Twitter– The voice of the people of Britain.

U

USA– Hotbed of evil. Source of global imperialism and all human misery. Answer to the question “Who’s fault is it?” whatever the context.

V

Vladimir Putin– Heroic scourge of imperialist oppression and enabler of freedom. Generously provides Russian troops to neighbouring countries to help make sure they are enjoying their freedom enough.

W

Watsonite– an unstable magnetic substance, irresistiblyvdrawn to centres of power and liable to suddenly self-destruct without warning.

X

X – the mark voters put to the left of their chosen candidate’s name on the ballot paper. Unfortunately, there’s not much to the left of Jeremy Corbyn.

Y

Young people– They who will propel Jeremy Corybn into Number 10, thanks to their famous propensity to vote in general elections.

Z

Zero– the number of elections Labour will win before 2025.

worth a second go

 

[JC Footy Genius]

'The UK unemployment rate fell to a seven-year low of 5.4% in the three months to August, official figures have shown.....

The number of people out of work fell by 79,000 between June and August to 1.77 million, the Office for National Statistics said.

The number of people in work rose by 140,000, bringing the employment rate to 73.6% - the highest since records began in 1971

In the three months to August, workers' total earnings, including bonuses, were up 3% from a year earlier - slightly less than expected. Excluding bonuses, average weekly earnings growth slowed slightly to 2.8%.'

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-34526655

Time for a radical change to Socialist policies anyone ?

 

[1066familyman]

worth a second go

Why, did the blue tac holding it up on the posh boys 6th form common room wall cause it to fall down?

 

[Surf's Up]

worth a second go

Haha - nearly spat my cornflakes out laughing - thanks for this...missed it first time around. Its totally childish of course and reads like something that Private Eye might have published in the 1970s. And in that sense it rather humorously demonstrates just how far the Labour Party have come in the intervening years!!

 

[pastafarian]

Why, did the blue tac holding it up on the posh boys 6th form common room wall cause it to fall down?

i dont know

is this a semen related question,or **** on a biscuit type stereotypical question,perhaps knob a pig

help me out here.......i need some more clues

 

[El Presidente]

left and right or right then left

You do the okey-hokey and you turn around,

That's what it's all about

 

[Herr Tubthumper]

"There was a 4,600 rise in the number claiming jobless benefits to 796,200 in September."

"Wage growth remains weaker than before the financial crisis"

"The number now working part-time rose 68,000 to 8.35 million."

"We'll probably see some slowdown in overall GDP growth in the third quarter"

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-34526655

Time for a radical change to Socialist policies anyone ?

 

[soistes]

I've lost count of how many times I've read articles like this one spelling out how basic economics does not require a country to run a permanent surplus and that it would be bonkers to have an Osborne-type rule requiring governments to do so. Sadly the message never seems to get through and the dominant Thatcherite mistake based on a daft analogy between a household budget and the macro-economy seems to be permanently engrained in public consciousness.
http://www.theguardian.com/commenti...g-within-means-economic-labour-john-mcdonnell

 

[beorhthelm]

I've lost count of how many times I've read articles like this one spelling out how basic economics does not require a country to run a permanent surplus and that it would be bonkers to have an Osborne-type rule requiring governments to do so.

ive lost count of reading an economist elsewhere the next day saying how wrong the first is. its not Thatcherite, its differing views on best economic strategy. and the point of targeting a surplus over a medium term is that to ensure that debt is sustainable. if one continues to run deficits, eventually there is a shock and you have to cope with that with little fiscal room to maneuver. even in the Keynesian model you are supposed to pay back the money in medium term and get the debt down. we got into a cycle were we ratchet up the spending after every economic shock, with rare reversals.

McDonnell's getting panned for the u-turn more than the policy itself. three weeks ago he supported it, now he doesn't, with apparently no discussion with any of the shadow cabinet or even leader, he has reversed a major policy. whats happened in those weeks, whats changed? he hasn't even made a case for the change, except that its "anti-austerity". thats not a coherent economic strategy, to effectively say you will target a perpetual budget deficit.

and i find this part particularly troubling from an economist:

McDonnell pointed out that running a budget surplus means taking demand out of the economy, so there is an economic illiteracy in wanting to run one more or less permanently.

. implies without government the economy is incapable of generating any demand.

on the other hand McDonnell does have one good point, that he should be held to:

He also argued that surplus should be run only on the current (consumption) component of the budget, and that deficit could – and should – be run on the capital (investment) component of it. His view was that if you borrow to invest, the debt will more than pay for itself in the long run as the investment matures and raises the economy’s output, and thus tax revenue.

that means running a surplus on the welfare, pensions, etc spending components, with only a deficit from infrastructure expenditure such as road, hospitals, schools etc. i dont think that quite what he has in mind though.