Well you see it's like this:
1. You find out and make a short list of rich people.
2. You prepare a letter pleading for them to take over your club.
3. Send letters to all these people. (Check spilling and garmmar)
4. Wait 7 days and follow-up by phone.
5. One will be taken by your plight and invest £500m so that Victor and Niles Winrock will stay and lead you to everlasting success.
6. You will all live happily everafter.
Easy really.
Dear Carwash.
Your uncle Nigel has died in Nigeria and you need to send me £50,000 in order that I can release funds in the region of...etc, etc