[Misc] OT - Sexual Harassment at Work - BBC article and quiz

[Hamilton]

Well the '99.9999999% of victims' quote didn't hammer it home. It was so obviously bollox!

Er, yes it did, and the point wasn't.

 

[METALMICKY]

Funny you say that as I covered this topic in class today with a group of teens. They collectively came to the conclusion that approaching a women in public to ask her out (in a bar, cafe etc) is unacceptable.

Coming from the 80's nightclubbing period it could have been carnage with harassment claims. Basically Most mainstream clubs would have 20 mins of ' slowies' whereby blokes would circle the dancefloor before requesting a slow dance from gaggles of girls who would be disappointed if they never got asked. The worst the bloke might face would be the ' walk back to the pavilion' and hoots of derision from his mates.

 

[Wilko]

Coming from the 80's nightclubbing period it could have been carnage with harassment claims. Basically Most mainstream clubs would have 20 mins of ' slowies' whereby blokes would circle the dancefloor before requesting a slow dance from gaggles of girls who would be disappointed if they never got asked. The worst the bloke might face would be the ' walk back to the pavilion' and hoots of derision from his mates.

Slowies, also known as the erection section.

 

[Triggaaar]

This is all pretty horrifying stuff, and while my "99.999999% of victims" quote was designed to just hammer a point home, the point stills stands

I just thought your keyboard was broken.

 

[colinz]

As a hot blooded heterosexual male, I can claim to have myself a few times been sexually harassed in the work place. Trouble is I'm guilty of having done it myself on multiple more occasions.
Only once been called up to HR and that was because a woman I didn't even fancy, complained over a comment I made about what she was wearing.

 

[sussex_guy2k2]

Well, it sort of remotely is...

The Crime Survey for England and Wales estimated that 20% of women and 4% of men have experienced some type of sexual assault since the age of 16, equivalent to an estimated 3.4 million female victims and 631,000 male victims. That means that 84% of crimes were suffered by women.

Of the crimes suffered by men, fewer than 0.1% of men had experienced rape or assault by penetration. This trend is not the same for women.

By gender, females are most likely to experience sexual assault between the ages of 10-19. For males it is 5-14.

This is all pretty horrifying stuff, and while my "99.999999% of victims" quote was designed to just hammer a point home, the point stills stands - women experience far more cases of sexual harassment and crime than men.

You're quoting statistics without knowing the law. That never helps your argument.

 

[BrickTamland]

As previously mentioned, if you match with a woman on tinder she has contributed to the 2 way consent of attraction. If you approach her in a coffee shop she has not. That is the theory btw and not my opinion.

And, yes, I would say we already have a socially awkward tech generation.

It does make sense though. A good female friend of mine was, whilst in a relationship, asked out by a guy in a bookstore. She politely declined and continued to browse before realising he was never more than a metre away. He followed her around some shops before she confronted him. He kept telling her how beautiful she was and that she ‘wanted him really’ and was just ‘playin hard to get’. She had to phone her boyfriend to come and meet her, when he arrived the creep surprisingly disappeared. This guy was in his 30s and in a suit, not your generic creepy lowlife.


Whilst of course singular anecdotal situations don’t necessarily count as the norm it isn’t always as ‘rom commy’ as it sounds.

I personally met my longtime girlfriend on tinder, and the majority of my friends in relationships met their friends online, mostly tinder, too. (That’s not to say tinder is perfect or safe by any means)

 

[The Antikythera Mechanism]

Women wear perfume to smell good and attract compliments. If they didn’t want compliments they’d just have a quick squirt of toilet duck.

 

[grubbyhands]

Women wear perfume to smell good and attract compliments. If they didn’t want compliments they’d just have a quick squirt of toilet duck.

Yup!

 

[pearl]

Be pretty creepy not to get 7/7 tho eh? No 'management training' required. Hopefully.

really? I got 3/7

 

[Wilko]

It does make sense though. A good female friend of mine was, whilst in a relationship, asked out by a guy in a bookstore. She politely declined and continued to browse before realising he was never more than a metre away. He followed her around some shops before she confronted him. He kept telling her how beautiful she was and that she ‘wanted him really’ and was just ‘playin hard to get’. She had to phone her boyfriend to come and meet her, when he arrived the creep surprisingly disappeared. This guy was in his 30s and in a suit, not your generic creepy lowlife.


Whilst of course singular anecdotal situations don’t necessarily count as the norm it isn’t always as ‘rom commy’ as it sounds.

I personally met my longtime girlfriend on tinder, and the majority of my friends in relationships met their friends online, mostly tinder, too. (That’s not to say tinder is perfect or safe by any means)

You are right that some guys do not seem to read the signals. Shame we have lost that 'eyes across a room' connection but maybe that is a bit old school idealistic.

 

[pearl]

You are right that some guys do not seem to read the signals. Shame we have lost that 'eyes across a room' connection but maybe that is a bit old school idealistic.

yeah, this thread is well depressing

 

[wellquickwoody]

but I'd never think it was acceptable to compliment a women's perfume at work.

Thank God I have no need to date anymore, FFS.......

 

[schmunk]

Thank God I have no need to date anymore, FFS.......

Not since "the incident"...

 

[Wilko]

[/B]

yeah, this thread is well depressing

I think so but likewise a few of my female friends have said they would love to be approached a bit more often in a cafe or a pub. I guess the key as a guy is that if she is clearly not interested then accept it and move on.

 

[narly101]

I think so but likewise a few of my female friends have said they would love to be approached a bit more often in a cafe or a pub. I guess the key as a guy is that if she is clearly not interested then accept it and move on.

This is the bit that disturbs me the most. The fact that a "no" in this instance can be ignored by some men. At what other points through that man's life is another "no" ignored. If the lady isn't interested, she isn't interested, doesn't then give you the right to creep her out, and stalk her, because "she's playing hard to get". Really not difficult to see what the problem here is.

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

Blimey. I complimented our receptionist on her new haircut yesterday.

I'm just waiting for the HR call now.

 

[pearl]

I think so but likewise a few of my female friends have said they would love to be approached a bit more often in a cafe or a pub. I guess the key as a guy is that if she is clearly not interested then accept it and move on.

But why should the guy do the approaching? IN this gender neutral society why don't women have a bit more balls (so to speak)

 

[METALMICKY]

Yup!

And then you have the polar opposite scenario and how to deal with it. Senior admin manager who is grossly overweight ( let's call her Natasha) visits our office and within 5 mins of sitting next to me I clearly detect ' a womanly smell'. Then within 5 mins everyone clocks it and someone declares that the office smells of cat urine! Three of us who then own cats get the third degree as to whether we one of our pets has piddled on our coats or rucksacks. I kid you not!

Say you smell nice you're in trouble! Then when someone has a serious feminine hygiene nobody says anything!

 

[mejonaNO12 aka riskit]

Senior admin manager who is grossly overweight ( let's call her Natasha)

Fatasha?