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NSC sorts the national debt
- Thread starter Brighton TID
- Start date
brakespear
Doctor Worm
- Jul 7, 2003
- 47,641
Sell Portsmouth (the city) to France. Should raise £100. Maybe £150 if you throw Southampton in too.
brakespear
Doctor Worm
and extra-heavy tax every time Al Murray appears on Dave.
D
Deleted member 2719
Guest
Stick Blair and Brown in the stocks and pay to throw
1. eggs £10 each
2. Bricks £1000 each
3. Grenades £10,000 each
Well it wouldn't raise alot but it would fun to watch.
.
1. eggs £10 each
2. Bricks £1000 each
3. Grenades £10,000 each
Well it wouldn't raise alot but it would fun to watch.
.
- Jul 7, 2003
- 47,641
Or every time John Barrowman appears on TV, anywhere.
brakespear
Doctor Worm
Lewes' best seagull
New member
- Jan 31, 2008
- 1,145
Get out of Afghanistan.
Alternatively, just tax when somebody says "would/should/could of"
Wouldn't raise much, but I'd be f***ing pleased.
Alternatively, just tax when somebody says "would/should/could of"
Wouldn't raise much, but I'd be f***ing pleased.
severnside gull
Well-known member
Some tongue in cheek some less so........... 
close down all quangos and sell the properties they occupy
close down HMRC and replace the civil servants with private sector companies on commission competent to pursue the billions of outstanding tax currently defaulted or lost in the system
sack everyone in the NHS with the word administrator or executive in their job title (and see if anyone notices)
ditto local government
time-limit payments such as housing benefit, incapacity benefit, unemployment benefit etc; cancel family tax credits to single parents under 25; child allowance likewise and cancel all payments other than basic pension to non-UK residents
get together with all major nations to tax bankers' bonuses up to 90% and create a special rate of corporation tax for financial institutions' surpluses
dismantle final salary pension schemes in the public sector
cancel the nuclear deterrant
get the f*** out of Iraq and Afghanistan
pay MP's a fixed salary with no expenses
ban all salaries for elected local government officials and replace with the old system of fixed nominal expenses for attendance leaving the salaried staff to manages service while the elected officials set policies
leave the EU
and to solve police concerns over the effects of cuts......
-issue police officers with voice activated word processors to save time report writing
-increase tax on alcopops, spirits, beers over 5%ABV and ciders by 200%, restore licenced hours; ban all on-street drinking and increase the use of on street fines for public order offences
-automatic suspension of licence for any establishment selling alcohol underage
-automatically send cars of anyone drink-driving or driving without tax and insurance to the crusher
-privatise arresting of bail absconders and collecting of fines with bounty hunters on a commission
-expand community service in preference to prison sentences with tasks such as street cleaning or removing graffitti on a target basis where standards are independantly assessed and if not met result in an automatic doubling of the sentence.
-get rid of all chauffered cars for senior officers
-reduce civilian admin staff by 50% (and see if anyone notices)
close down all quangos and sell the properties they occupy
close down HMRC and replace the civil servants with private sector companies on commission competent to pursue the billions of outstanding tax currently defaulted or lost in the system
sack everyone in the NHS with the word administrator or executive in their job title (and see if anyone notices)
ditto local government
time-limit payments such as housing benefit, incapacity benefit, unemployment benefit etc; cancel family tax credits to single parents under 25; child allowance likewise and cancel all payments other than basic pension to non-UK residents
get together with all major nations to tax bankers' bonuses up to 90% and create a special rate of corporation tax for financial institutions' surpluses
dismantle final salary pension schemes in the public sector
cancel the nuclear deterrant
get the f*** out of Iraq and Afghanistan
pay MP's a fixed salary with no expenses
ban all salaries for elected local government officials and replace with the old system of fixed nominal expenses for attendance leaving the salaried staff to manages service while the elected officials set policies
leave the EU
and to solve police concerns over the effects of cuts......
-issue police officers with voice activated word processors to save time report writing
-increase tax on alcopops, spirits, beers over 5%ABV and ciders by 200%, restore licenced hours; ban all on-street drinking and increase the use of on street fines for public order offences
-automatic suspension of licence for any establishment selling alcohol underage
-automatically send cars of anyone drink-driving or driving without tax and insurance to the crusher
-privatise arresting of bail absconders and collecting of fines with bounty hunters on a commission
-expand community service in preference to prison sentences with tasks such as street cleaning or removing graffitti on a target basis where standards are independantly assessed and if not met result in an automatic doubling of the sentence.
-get rid of all chauffered cars for senior officers
-reduce civilian admin staff by 50% (and see if anyone notices)
... and James Corden
And I like the idea of a fine for anyone who says "Can I get...?" Perhaps we should have English language police patrolling the streets handing out fines to dickheads in Starbucks.
Come to think of it, there should just be a tax on Starbucks.
Bevendean Hillbilly
New member
How much would that raise? about 30 quid.
Finch
Active member
This is probably pointless to mention, but the role of administrators is generally to save money.
You can make Orthopaedic surgeons spend their day on the phone requesting medical records, but its not going to be very efficient when you could be paying someone a lot less to do it.
withdeanwombat
Well-known member
No wonder the country's in debt.Perhaps they would prefer to buy Sussix ?
Maybeifwestoppedusingspaceswecouldsaveafewbob.
The Great Cornholio
New member
I think you will find that the vast majority of these properties are leased. And as the government are finding out, closing quangos not only leads to thousands of people out of work but massive shortfalls in redundancy payments and pension funds.
And despite the perception of hundreds of thousands of Sir Humphreys, I still fail to see how replacing not for profit organisations with private sector firms making huge profits is going to save money.
severnside gull
Well-known member
fair enough but in my experience Clerks do the same job for much less money
severnside gull
Well-known member
The Great Cornholio
New member
OK - well let's take a Quango the Government has already abolished - the Audit Commission. Are you happy for councils to spend their money as they see fit without external auditing?
For every Advisory Committee on Historic Wreck Sites, there is a Quango that independently monitors the work of government. You may trust politicians to act in the public interest every minute of every day. I sadly do not share your trust.