[Humour] Joke du Jour

[Brovion]

A man was paddling in his kayak in a river in northern Canada near the Arctic circle. It was freezing cold and he was worried that, despite his warm clothes, he'd die of exposure. He stopped paddling, and rummaged around in his equipment until he found his small portable gas stove. He lit it and put it by his feet, and soon the heat from the stove had indeed warmed him up.
Unfortunately he then went over some choppy water, the stove toppled over, set fire to the kayak, the kayak disintegrated and the man sadly fell into the water and drowned.

And the moral of the story is: You can't have your kayak and heat it.

 

[Is it PotG?]

Frankly anyone lighting a stove in a kayak is asking for problems. Common health and safety would have prevented such a mishap.

 

[Dick Swiveller]

A remote part of Canada and the man died? How on earth do you know the full details leading up to his demise? Don't think you are in CSI Canada and can piece together this seemingly unlikely series of events from the remaining evidence.

 

[narly101]

Canoe provide evidence of this man's demise? One thing that should be staring everyone in the face is that even had the stove not toppled over, it is likely that as he was using an enclosed seat kayak (incredibly likely considering he was in the wilds of Canada) and putting the stove at his feet, it would have set light to the top of the kayak. The man's a buffoon and deserved his fate.

 

[Insel affe]

A man was paddling in his kayak in a river in northern Canada near the Arctic circle.(Hmm There is a place called the Arctic Circle, but it is in Alaska part of the USA on the Yokon River, is this the one you mean ?) It was freezing cold (No Shit Sherlock) and he was worried that, despite his warm clothes, he'd die of exposure. He stopped paddling, and rummaged around in his equipment until he found his small portable gas stove. He lit it and put it by his feet, and soon the heat from the stove had indeed warmed him up.
Unfortunately he then went over some choppy water, the stove toppled over, set fire to the kayak, the kayak disintegrated and the man sadly fell into the water and drowned.

And the moral of the story is: You can't have your kayak and heat it.

Apart from that, it still was not funny

 

[Harry Wilson's tackle]

If it was freezing cold how could he be paddling a kayak? The river would have been frozen, surely?

 

[Eggmundo]

Tragic story - my condolences to his family. :-(

 

[Withdean11]

A poetry contest had come down to two semi-finalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck. They were given a word, then allowed a minute to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was "Timbuktu".

First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination: Timbuktu.

The crowd loved it! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went,
Met three sluts in a pop-up tent.
They was three, and we was two,
So I bucked one, and Tim bucked two.

 

[schmunk]

If it was freezing cold how could he be paddling a kayak? The river would have been frozen, surely?

 

[el punal]

A man was paddling in his kayak in a river in northern Canada near the Arctic circle. It was freezing cold and he was worried that, despite his warm clothes, he'd die of exposure. He stopped paddling, and rummaged around in his equipment until he found his small portable gas stove. He lit it and put it by his feet, and soon the heat from the stove had indeed warmed him up.
Unfortunately he then went over some choppy water, the stove toppled over, set fire to the kayak, the kayak disintegrated and the man sadly fell into the water and drowned.

And the moral of the story is: You can't have your kayak and heat it.

That, my son, is taking the biscuit!

 

[Hampden Park]

not a kayak in sight

 

[bhafc99]

A man was paddling in his kayak in a river in northern Canada near the Arctic circle. It was freezing cold and he was worried that, despite his warm clothes, he'd die of exposure. He stopped paddling, and rummaged around in his equipment until he found his small portable gas stove. He lit it and put it by his feet, and soon the heat from the stove had indeed warmed him up.
Unfortunately he then went over some choppy water, the stove toppled over, set fire to the kayak, the kayak disintegrated and the man sadly fell into the water and drowned.

And the moral of the story is: You can't have your kayak and heat it.

Was his name Hal, and did he steal the kayak from his son?

 

[Thunder Bolt]

Kayaks are only 6-8 feet long so how would he be rummaging around in his equipment to find a small gas stove? How much equipment did he have to rummage around in? How did he fit a small gas stove in the kayak?

 

[schmunk]

Kayaks are only 6-8 feet long so how would he be rummaging around in his equipment to find a small gas stove?

 

[Frankie]

Tragic story - my condolences to his family. :-(

I don't think this is a true story , it has more holes in it than a blazing Canadian Kayak .

 

[Thunder Bolt]

That's a canoe, not a kayak.

 

[Dorset Seagull]

Was his name Hal, and did he steal the kayak from his son?

My dad's name is Hal but I don't own a kayak

 

[Gazwag]

We should all wear our moose badges to remember him and stand together to sing My heart will go on

 

[bhafc99]

Was his name Hal, and did he steal the kayak from his son?

My dad's name is Hal but I don't own a kayak

Hal Robson-Kanu.

 

[Superphil]

Been here ages. When does the joke start?