[Humour] Joke du Jour

[hart's shirt]

This is just one more example of both the evils of the internet and the dangers of copying what is popular online.

The tragic demise of the gentleman was more than likely caused by imitating the foolhardy and reckless Kayak Andy.

As far as I'm concerned, he's got blood on his hands.

Skip to 14:00 onwards for the incriminating evidence.

 

[Albalbion]

A poetry contest had come down to two semi-finalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck. They were given a word, then allowed a minute to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was "Timbuktu".

First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination: Timbuktu.

The crowd loved it! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went,
Met three sluts in a pop-up tent.
They was three, and we was two,
So I bucked one, and Tim bucked two.

I certainly hope the redneck was disqualified as he did not actually use the word Timbuktu.
I'm all for having a bit of poetic license, but that example is 'extracting the urine' so to speak.

Also, if he cant understand a not altogether common but certainly not unheard of word like Timbuktu, I have trouble believing he could have made it to the final in the first place.

 

[schmunk]

Hal Robson-Kanu.

Is he 6-8 feet long?

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

Don't accept this. If this were a kayak, as opposed to a canoe, it would have had an airtight splash deck applied. The stove would have used up all of the oxygen and therefore would unlikely have been able to start the said fire. Perhaps this was a ruse and there was foul play afoot?

 

[Tim Over Whelmed]

A poetry contest had come down to two semi-finalists: a Yale graduate and a redneck. They were given a word, then allowed a minute to study the word and come up with a poem that contained the word. The word they were given was "Timbuktu".

First to recite his poem was the Yale graduate. He stepped to the microphone and said:

Slowly across the desert sand
Trekked a lonely caravan.
Men on camels, two by two
Destination: Timbuktu.

The crowd loved it! No way could the redneck top that, they thought. The redneck calmly made his way to the microphone and recited:

Me and Tim a-huntin went,
Met three sluts in a pop-up tent.
They was three, and we was two,
So I bucked one, and Tim bucked two.

Why did Tim get two, did you toss for it?

 

[The Brighton Bear]

The so-called moral of the story is rubbish too "You can't have your kayak and heat it."

You can if you stay on firm ground.

 

[Jack Straw]

The punch-line reminds me of an old saying, "You can't have your cake and eat it." Quite a coincidence?

 

[Norman Potting]

If I had a Kayak I would call it Beram. But I haven't.

 

[schmunk]

The punch-line reminds me of an old saying, "You can't have your cake and eat it." Quite a coincidence?

Wow, that is a coincidence.

 

[Winker]

Shirley the moral of the story is that if you are freezing in that situation, then pull over to the bank are make a camp, cook some hot food and drink and call for help. I can't believe he didn't think of that.

 

[Eeyore]

The OP is not telling the truth.

Heating apparatus for kayak seats are readily available.

https://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Kayak-Pa...ontracting-Cover-Hand-Hold-Grip-/141652131288

Just because a man makes improvised and foolish efforts to do so should not detract from normal evidence that such a process is possible.