I have a solution to the money problems at Albion

[Digweeds Trousers]

People are rightly worried about how we are going to fund wages and keep players such as Nicolas.

I have the perfect solution.

We play ourselves for nothing. Perfect!!

Now all we have to do is cobble together a team from NSC, write to McGhee and say, we cn help. OK we will have to make sacrifices like train twice a week for an hour. I will stop smiking and try to lose a couple of pounds, but I really do think I have struck Gold.

I play at Centre Half for Pembury in the Kent County League on a Saturday. Have also plied my trade in the Southern Cheshire league playing for styal.

Now who else is ready to help the Albion??

Answer and volunteers below please.

PS I think we should expect expenses for travel from DK but he will be delighted I'm sure as we could make a huge cut in his wage bill.

 

[On the Left Wing]

People are rightly worried about how we are going to fund wages and keep players such as Nicolas.

I have the perfect solution.

We play ourselves for nothing. Perfect!!

Now all we have to do is cobble together a team from NSC, write to McGhee and say, we cn help. OK we will have to make sacrifices like train twice a week for an hour. I will stop smiking and try to lose a couple of pounds, but I really do think I have struck Gold.

I play at Centre Half for Pembury in the Kent County League on a Saturday. Have also plied my trade in the Southern Cheshire league playing for styal.

Now who else is ready to help the Albion??

Answer and volunteers below please.

PS I think we should expect expenses for travel from DK but he will be delighted I'm sure as we could make a huge cut in his wage bill.

Yep, sign me up. I am still of playing age (by Peter Shilton standards), I don't drink or smoke, but am almost two stone overweight and have part of one lung missing ... but I can kick a ball and reckon I'm not as fat as Butters. I play centre back.

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

OTLW - marvellous news my good man. Five minutes in and we've already got a central defensive partnership. I tell you what, this scouting/management thing is an absolute doddle.

 

[Wardy]

Sign me up for a Center Forward. Not that good but a good learner.

 

[Lammy]

I too can play centre back!

At least until my knees give out! I'm also about 2 stone overweight but that will soon be shifted with some proper training! I'd even be prepared to fund my own travel to home games but not my half time jaffa cake!

I'm in!

 

[Braders]

hotshot striker here

 

[Digweeds Trousers]

Right, well do we play three at the back then wioth wing backs. Are there any pacy full backs out there with the engine to tuck in when we defend and bomb forward on the break. tactics are not a big issue at the moment as the internationals give us a bit of time but I would appreciate some help on the coaching side and man management side.

What about the good women of NSC - can they help as well??

 

[Lammy]

As usual the Albion is going to be a little lightweight in midfield...

 

[n1 gull]

I'm happy to help out at Right back, I play every week in the Islington league. Nursing a bruised shin at the moment, as some twat clattered me last night whilst losing cup game lost 4-1 doh!

 

[JJ McClure]

I can play in goal, but only in a fairly poor Will Packham stylee.

 

[Deportivo Seagull]

Me ..... I can play either wing or full back ..... however not with a round ball ...

 

[Braders]

right so its

gk - 80s seagull
rb- n1 gull
cb-otlw
cb-digweed
cb-lammy
lb-Dick Knights Mum
mf-?
mf-?
mf-?
st- wardywonderland
st- me

 

[Perry's Tracksuit Bottoms]

I'm absolutely appalling, but what I lack up in ability I make up for in enthusiasm. I bloody love it, me. I've always had really quite deludedly unrealistic about a scout spotting me playing in the park one afternoon (if you saw me kicking a ball about in the park you'd realise how deluded I am).

Never the less, I reckon that I could manage a fluke winning FA cup goal and go down in Albion history as a total legend. So can I be a one man up front goal machine please?

 

[Perry's Tracksuit Bottoms]

Ok so there's only midfield left. So I'll play there where I can hang around and loook interested and wait for my moment of glory as I nutmeg a load of Man U players Escape To Glory style and get my moment of magic.

 

[Seagullible]

I'd like to challenge for the keepers place - I have semi-pro experience

 

[Dick Knights Mumm]

Can I fill the problem left-sided position. I can't kick with my left foot but that shouldn't be a problem.

 

[Simster]

Can I fill the problem left-sided position. I can't kick with my left foot but that shouldn't be a problem.

I can, I am a gifted left sided player, and you're in my place. Now get back to your amateur Portslade effort.

 

[Marc]

I'd like to challenge for either RB or LB please...or take a seat on the bench!

 

[The Large One]

I'll be physio. I don't know anything about the human body or the human condition, but I do make a damn fine banoffee pie.

 

[SurreySeagulls]

As I am a qualified Referee I will stand in instead of the appointed Referee and donate my match fee to the Albion. I promise to be as unbaised as I can be, but you can expect the Albion to beat the longest winning streak in British history.